Forty Deuce

Serena. For. The. WIN.

See the awesome reactions by Caro and Lindsay, after the jump.

Caroline Wozniacki Sitting In A Tree. Oh, Wait...

Again, if you're not on Twitter, I get it.  But far be it from me to let this slide.  Caro is like, an insanely good Twitter-flirter.  And, not to imply anything, but she's the village bike of the tennis Twittersphere:  Everybody gets a ride:

Fer:

 

Nole:

 

And of course, The Tall One:

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Hey big-timer!! How is life? havent heard from you in a while!

John
@CaroWozniacki don't try this crap again woz! Another text I sent you and another heartbreak for me btw fantasy soccer??? cmon now

Vika:
@JohnIsnerTennis @CaroWozniacki should I just follow u guys?

John:
@vika7 woz never responds to my texts. congrats btw

Vika:
@JohnIsnerTennis she always responds u on the other hand not really))))

John:
@vika7 hmmmm im not so sure about that

Caro:
@vika7 What?? I always answer your texts.. How can you be on his side? Very disapointed !!

Vika:
@CaroWozniacki I'm with u I said he doesn't answer. How could u think about me! Lol

Carol:
@vika7 Hahah!! Sorry girl!! My bad!! You are right!! thanks

John:
@vika7 stop taking here side vika!

....
Few day later
Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis what happened?

John
@CaroWozniacki rolled my ankle up 5-3 in the first set . Good job today!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:05:56 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Nooo! How bad is it? did you get an mri?
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:06:26 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John
@CaroWozniacki I just did. I think ill be fine but it looks nasty ugh.
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:07:35 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Oh im sorry! I know, have been there! Is it very swollen?
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:08:41 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John:@CaroWozniacki unfortunately yes. I know u have been here before!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:10:03 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Ok Rest up well!! Ice ice ice.. leg up and you will be ok!! (Says the expert.. haha)
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:11:32 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John:
@CaroWozniacki thanks doc!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:12:40 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis haha! You are welcome.. any time lol
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:13:52 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

It's gotten to the point that the tennis elder statesmen are on the case:

The BryBros:

 

Lindsay:

Oh, Woz.  You're such a tease.  It's kind of awesome.

(Screencaps from Tennis Forum)

Dubs Luvs.

If the ladies singles final was a bit of a snoozer, the doubles final more than made up for it. DavenBer eventually pulled it out in a tight super-tiebreak, 75 67 10-8, but it was a really entertaining match to watch. You'd think Zheng/Chan would have a tough time getting the ball past the tall American ladies, but they were lobbing like mofos. It was hilarious.

Congrats on the comeback, Lindsay. As for you, Liezel, well, I don't understand you and I dare say I'm going to stop trying. She was playing with some kids yesterday and hit a kick serve at a poor 10 year old girl. Even Lindsay called her out: "A kick serve? Really, Liezel?"

Whatevs.

"Mommy, You Said The F Word!"

Davs was on the practice courts yesterday with Liezel and let me just say, the woman can still hit the smack out of the ball.  That said, she's going to need to work on her dubs skillz:

It was a fun practice to watch. Minus the ear piercing musings of one Liezel Huber.

LiezelPort? DavenBer?

Lindsay's finally here.  She's playing dubs with Liezel.  

Here's the dubs draw in case you're interested.

Believe it.

Air Quotes: No, Lindsay

Fom Jezebel:

Lindsay Davenport, who is a friend of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren, says the media's "insinuation that [Elin] would be aggressive or attacking is just preposterous. ... She always handles herself with class."

Let's assume for a second that the situation was reversed and the allegations were that Tiger was aggressive and attacked Elin.  Lindsay's "insight" into the situation would sound pretty preposterous, no?  In fact, it would sound pretty damn ignorant and disgusting.

True BFFs

Cute interview by LindsayKAD James LaRosa of Lindsay and Corina.  I'm kinda "meh" on Lindsay but I do love me some Corina.  Speaking of which, did you guys know she was diagnosed with leukemia in 2001, beat it, and came back?  Pretty rad, that one.

Thank God I'm Actually Going To Indian Wells (I Think).

Guess who's commentating for FSN during Indian Wells:

Lindsay Davs and Justin Gimelstob.

Nein Danke.  If I'm not actually at Indian Wells I'm definitely scouring the web for a Eurosport stream.

Is that a Baby Bjorn Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?

Lindsay's pregnant.  So she's not going to play AO.  Think maybe she should have ran that test a few weeks ago?  Probably.

But on the serious, congrats, Linds.  I hope to God your next kid's head is smaller than Jagger's.  That's just...ouch.

Oh Dear God. LET. IT. GO.

Lindsay's entered the Australian Open. 

*insert hard core eye roll*

Air Quotes: Now Everyone's Piling On

"I think in the eyes of most of the players and the fans and media from around the world she is the #1 players.  She doesn't play week in and week out like Jelena Jankovic does but she is the most dominant player.  If you look at this tournament she has a winning record against every single player in this field.  On the side, Jelena Jankovic was 1-4 versus top 5 players.  That's not a record that you can say a dominant #1 can have."

-- Lindsay Davenport, on Serena as the most dominant player on the tour

Lindsay Davs in Doha

During Tennis Channel's broadcast of the Pennetta/Garrigues semi in Zurich, Corina Morariu said that Lindsay would be joining them in Doha to help with the commentating duties. 

This could get interesting.  Lindsay's never hidden her lack of fondness for our current #1 and she obviously loves the Williamses and Baby E.  I would love to hear her do the color commentary for her one of JJ's matches.  Colorful, indeed.

US Open Day 3 Results: Bye Bye Bepa, Hello Jo!

My Latvian boy Ernests made it through in 4 sets to set up a probable Friday night matchup with Andy.  If Andy wants a test he's going to get one.  Ernie, for better or worse, always plays as if he has nothing to lose.  Probably because he comes from a filthy rich family.  Seriously, boy, why are you playing tennis?  Go home and drive your sportscars!

Nole looked great in his straight set win over Clement.  Unfortunately the match wasn't without incident as Nole rolled his ankle returning a serve in the third set.  He called for the trainer and looked alright, but who knows.  But really, he looked sharp, orange and turquoise Adidas gear notwithstanding.

As for A-Rod, he kicked off his 2008 campaign with a new "coach" in PMac, and improved form against The Magician.  Andy reminded me tonight of how good he can be, which was encouraging.  But once again it was a match that was marred with a touch of controversy.  On the second to last point of the match, A-Rod smacked a 140mph body serve that almost took Fabrice's head off.  Fabrice was none too happy and basically stood there while Andy aced him for the match.  Afterwards, Andy was extremely apologetic.  But something tells me Fabrice is a little miffed to lose so badly to the young brash American at his last US Open.

For the rest of the men, no huge surprises, though the start of the day saw retirements and withdrawals from Janko and Youzhny.  Robby Ginepri had a nice win today, as did Chris Guccione (as coached by Killer Cahill).  New Haven champ Marin Cilic fought hard for a 5 set win over French cutie Julien Benneteau.  And welcome back Jo Wilfried Tsonga!  He didn't look too sharp today, which is understandable since he's coming off injury, but he did win which means we'll get to see more of that million dollar smile. 

 

Meanwhile, Kuzzie is doing what she does and quietly making her way through the tournament.  She beat my girl Sorana Cirstea (seriously, people, keep an eye on this girl) in straight sets, but Sorana showed a lot of fight in the first, taking Kuzzie to a tiebreak.  Cirstea's got a great serve and solid groundstrokes.  She just needs the consistency and maybe some fitness work.  And she also needs to not wear that stupid Adidas petal dress. 

As for Lindsay, with Bepa's surprise loss today and JJ's struggles, boy, she's looking pretty good.  I've been really impressed with both of her matches.  If she can get past Mono Bartoli in the next round and stay injury free, I think she's clear into the quarters to potentially play JJ, who I can see her beating.  So keep an eye out on this bottom half.

As for the rest of the Ladies, I've already mentioned the Bepa upset.  But look out Britain!  Anne Keothavong had a huge win over Franny Schiavone.  I love Anne.  Her accept is lovely.  In another upset only on paper, Zheng Jie beat Annabel Medina Garrigues.  On the other hand, Pazcek lost to Rybarikova 1 and 2.  A real shame as I was expecting at least a run to the third round after her success in Montreal.  But don't lose faith in the youth of the tour.  Ski Boots and Vika Azarenka both had solid straight set wins today and will play each other on Friday.  Go Ski Boots!

Lastly, I leave you with this:

Seriously, I could just write an entire blog on JJ.  But it's just too easy.

Air Quotes: Hmmm...I wonder who she's talking about?

"I try to bring as little drama as possible, unlike some other players we have."

-- Lindsay Davs, on why fans gravitate to her no-nonsense style.

US Open Opening Ceremonies: Less fireworks, more hotness.

I could have done without the Jersey Boys, whose lead singer sounded like he was just castrated before taking the stage.  The presence of Forrest Whittaker was also random and at times distracting.  But the parade of Champions was really cool, even if Pete, Andre, Steffi,Justine, Jimmy, and The Rafter didn't show up.

Yeah, y'all looked nice and all.  But let's pause a moment to appreciate the Champions of HAWTNESS.

Tasty tasty treats, my friends.  Don't fight it.  Just sit back, enjoy, and let the Hawtness flow right over you.

BREAKING NEWS: Lindsay withdraws from singles.

Whatever.  She's still planning to play doubles though. 

"You gotta know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away..."

Lindsay Davs has pulled out of next week's East West Bank Classic in LA.

Seriously.  Just call it a career, Linds.

"Load Tlip!"

Let the US Open Series begin.  Anyone want to set the line for how many top 20 withdrawals we'll see this year?

Here's the new commercial for 2008:

From Rafa's improved-but-still-broken-English and Ana's weird jazz hands, to Masha and Nole's curious absences (hmm...), it's pretty entertaining.  Though I do have one question: In what way, shape, or form is Nicole Vaidisova still relevant?

Speaking of Rafa's broken English, here are the outtakes from last year's commercial:

My favorite part is Justine's snarky "That's my name. I remember that."

Just like Lindsay, this is getting old.

Lindsay Davenport has pulled out of Stanford due to a bum leg.  She has been replaced with Alexandra Wozniak.  Combined with Elena D.'s withdrawal, this Stanford draw is so frickin' weak.  Just give Serena the check now and save us all the energy.