Forty Deuce

It Couldn't End Any Other Way

For a second there I thought Bali was immune to the "limping to the finish line" theme.  Shame on me for forgetting that Marion was involved.  

I didn't see the match, but from the pictures it looked like Mono was in some real pain and did try to fight through the injury.  She actually had set point at 5-2 in the first before Rezai was able to reel off the next 5 games.  After that, Mono retired in tears, giving Rezai the title and her Top 30 ranking.

And as if it couldn't be more ironic, the retirement means Mono will stay outside of the Top 10, allowing her the opportunity to play as many tourneys as she wants next year.

Look, I have no doubt that she was hurt this time.  But at what point do you not look around and realize that you've retired from so many frickin' matches relative to other WTAers, that clearly there is something wrong with your training regimen.  It's really ridiculous and, honestly, irresponsible.

All that said, mucho congrats to Aravane!  A nice little cap to the season.

Hot French Girl on Girl Action.

An all French final in Bali as both Mono and Rezai go undefeated into the final.  It's an unlikely final but a satisfying one, I think.  I wonder what the FFT is thinking, though.  These aren't exactly their favorite Frenchies.

And correct me if I'm wrong here, but don't these two not get along?  Or am I just trying to build in some drama where there is none?  It's happened before.

If Marion wins, she's in the Top 10 and subject to the Roadmap (heh).  If Aravane wins, she'll crack the Top 30.

And Marion Makes Four

Mono and her ratty hat beat Shahar in straight sets to secure the final spot in the Bali semis.  So it'll be Mono, Kimiko, MJMS, and Aravene.

Uh...GO KIMIKO AND ARAVENE!

Bali Scores:

Group A: (1) Marion Bartoli (FRA) d. Shahar Peer (ISR) 63 62
Group B: María José Martínez Sánchez (ESP) d. (2) Samantha Stosur (AUS) 76(4) 75
Group C: Vera Dushevina (RUS)* d. Anabel Medina Garrigues (ESP) 26 61 75
Group D: (4/WC) Sabine Lisicki (GER) d. Melinda Czink (HUN) 62 67(1) 64

Bali Welcomes 90% of You.

 
Pretty sure Shahar's rockin' a flak vest under there.  Can't blame her.

The confusingly named Commonwealth Bank Tournament of Champions has kicked off in Bali.  I'm not sure anyone would describe Melinda Czink as a "Champion" per se, but whatever.  I'm tired, it's the end of the season, I'll go with it.

Here's your 12 woman field:

 

 

 

 

 

Vera is actually there as an alternate.  Sammy Stones and MJMS are also in the draw, though they were probably still on the boat from Doha.

Speaking of which, I'm craving a Pina Colada all of a sudden.  Not virgin.

Here are the groups:

GROUP A

Marion Bartoli

Shahar Peer

Magdelena Rybarikova

GROUP B

Samantha Stosur

Maria Jose Martinez Sanchez

Agnes Szavay

GROUP C

Yanina Wickmayer

Anabel Medina Garrigues

Kimiko Date Krumm

GROUP D

Sabine Lisicki

Melinda Czink
Aravane Rezai

The ladies will play Ring around the Robin, and the top player from each group will advance to the semis.

For more on how Indonesia knows how to throw a party, read this.

I'm Guessing The Theme To This Junior Prom Is "Island Paradise"

And that motley crew is your Bali field.  I'm sure the WTA was stoked to see that their headliner was Marion Bartoli.  Then again, I'm sure the WTA was stoked that they could even put together a field given the number of ladies who were refusing to play Bali.  I still think it's BS that there are women who were ranked higher than these ladies who didn't "qualify" for Bali because either they won the wrong tournaments or they didn't win a tournament at all.  But congrats to these ladies, who I'm sure will put on a solid tournament (and I mean that with no sarcasm at all).  I am firmly in the Sam/Sabine camp, with Kimiko serving as a spoiler. 

Doha 2009: Race to the Bottom

Dinara, Serena, Caro, Sveta, Venus, Elena and Vika are already in.  That means there's one spot left for the Year End Championships in Doha...

... and, with two weeks left, five players within striking distance.

 

(There are zero decent pictures of Marion out there.  Kinda funny.)

Jelena, Vera, Aga, Flavia and Marion.  Five players, 450 points, one spot.  And they're all playing at least once in the next two weeks.  And, obviously, not only is the one spot at #8 open, but both the alternate spots are up for grabs, too.  Given that for the last two years, alternates have both played and won matches at YEC (including Aga and Marion), you can bet no one's taking those spots or potential points for granted either.

Jelena and Vera are numbers 8 and 9 in the Race right now, respectively, and are separated by a mere five points.  They are both playing Moscow, and, of course, are respectively the defending champion (JJ) and and finalist (Bepa).  It seems natural to assume that, between those two, whoever goes farthest in Moscow will end up with the final spot for Doha.  That really takes the whole thing right down to the wire, since the Moscow final is a mere two days before start of play in Doha.  Game.  On.

However.

Aga, who vaulted herself back into YEC contention with her finals showing at Beijing this week, is currently #10 in the race (225 points behind JJ at #8, 200 points ahead of Flavia at #11) and is slated to play both Linz and Moscow.  A good showing at both could put her right up there, especially if one or both of JJ/Vera crashes out early at Kremlin Cup.  Plus, she should be super-motivated: she's on a hot streak, she's defending points from Doha last year, and a win at Linz would also qualify her for the Baby YEC in Bali.

Flavia, currently #11 in the Race, is 425 points out of 8th, which seems like a lot until you consider that she, like Aga, is playing both Linz and Moscow.  Since Flavia's already qualified for the Baby YEC, but can't go because of her Fed Cup commitments, it might be that she shows up at both tournaments extra hungry to make it into Doha, either fully qualified or as an alternate.  

Marion is #12 in the race, 450 points out of #8 and 225 points out of #10.  She's playing Osaka this week and, as the #2 seed, has a decent shot at the title, particularly if Caroline Wozniacki's health is still iffy.  On the one hand, since she's so far out of #8 and (unlike the two players directly in front of her) is only playing once, her odds for making the cut seem bad.  On the other hand, if I had to pick the steadiest competitor out of all five of these women... it might just be Marion.

So, there you have it.  On paper, it looks amazing.  As for the reality... well, God knows the WTA has had a hard time living up to billing this year, but I still kind of can't wait.

Huh. Ok.

Nice to see you're so excited about making your second straight semifinal by beating Lena, Agi.  Don't ever change.  Kuz cruised over Pavs in straight sets, setting up a fantastically headcasey semifinal against...

The Serena Slayer.  Big ups to Nads, who followed up her win over Serena with a three set win over Bollitieri Beater Shuai Peng.  Peng took the first set in a tiebreaker and was playing really well until she hurt her left leg.  From there is was just a matter of time before Nads ran away with it, though seriously, she was still Nadsy about it.  Headcases forever!

And in the "Wha happen???" story of the day, Mono somehow rallied from 63 51 down to win over Bepa.  What. The. Fuck. Vera.  She only won 7 points in the second set after leading 5-1.

Pic This: Can You Do Something About the Hair?

I've come to the obvious realization that any picture of Mono doing anything is funny.

The Vagina Monologues

Even after Kim dropped the first set 75, was there really any doubt that she'd pull this off against Mono?

 

And after Kimmy won the second set 61, was there really any doubt that Mono would call a MTO for what looked like a broken vagina?  Ok, yes, that picture doesn't capture it.  But when she was lying on the ground and the trainer was palpating, it looked like a broken vagina, or at least a vaginal sprain.  And as I said on Twitter, I don't know the specifics of Mono's anatomy so I'm going to stick with broken vagina.

Mono-Free

And thus, the comeback officially begins.


Kimmy dumped the 12th seeded Mono, 64 63.

A fantastic win for Kim and this has to give her a boost of confidence.  That said, come on, it's was against the always inconsistent Mono, who's never been able to really follow up a good run at a tourney.  Someone mentioned that she served 25% in the first set.  That's not going to cut it. 

But Kim still brought and she still notched the win.  Mucho props. 

But don't count me on the bandwagon just yet.
 

"He's Such a Copycat."

A few of you have written inquiring as to when the next installment of the Forty Deuce podcast would be up.  Here's the deal: It is SUPER awkward to do a podcast by yourself.  And with my partner in crime (heh), Love All, off at an undisclosed location for much of this year, I've had to shelve the podcasts.  Unfortunately my dog has very little to say about tennis.

But you can't say that I don't listen so here's the next installment, wherein I've roped in Forty Deuce regulars Sodapop, Carrie, and Victoria, to talk about everything from my general apathy towards Ana's losses, illegal immigration, and Stan's second fiddle, to how badly the WTA marketing department has failed, our love for tennis umpires, and the intimate details contained in Sodapop's diary.  You'll have to excuse any technical issues.  I'm still trying to master it all.  But I'll get it all worked out and I can promise your tech savvy and topically focused p-casts in the future.

I'm warning you, it's a long one and very WTA heavy.  Perfect for sitting in traffic while you're on your way to wherever you don't want to be.

Download Here.

Venus Gets Mono'd

Well Stanford was the Williamses in a nutshell.  If it ain't a Slam, Serena can and will lose early and Venus, while more consistent than Serena, can go wonky at any time and lose to consistent hitters. 

Hell of a performance by Mono, who wavered a bit but sacked up and courageously stepped up her game late in the third for the win.  This is only her first WTA Premier title.  I really didn't think she had it in her.  I figured, as most of us probably did, that she'd crumble under the pressure.  So all credit to Mono for finding the will to fight on, especially after missing her chances serving for the match.  I guess the bathroom break after the second set helped.  Amazing what five minutes in heaven with your laminated picture of Pierce Brosnan can do.

I hope she doesn't get eaten by that bear!!!

Pwnd

Hrmph.  That wasn't supposed to happen.

Granted I missed the third set because I had to make a Sprinkles run.  But at least for the first two sets, JJ was playing the way she needed to play: aggressively.  She was going for her shots and leaning into her groundies, really forcing Mono to play defense.  Had two match points points and couldn't convert and then she played a shit tiebreak in the second.  But I figured she'd be fine in the third.  Tells you what I know.

Lynn and Eva taking in the match and getting some sun.  Eva kept hamming it up with those fans. 

The people sitting around me kept looking at weird, wondering why I was taking pics of something other than the court.  Whatever.  This coming from people who, in response to me shouting "C'mon, JJ" whispered, "JJ?  Why is she calling her JJ?"

I've Got Some Lotto Numbers, If You're Interested.

Remember this?  Yeah, the "C" Stands for "Cleo", bitches.  It's so on.  From TennisReporters.net:

[A] coy Bartoli said that she preferred to face crushed Jankovic rather than the German because ‘ I always beat her.’ Bartoli is 4-3 against Jankovic and has won their last three matches. JJ was a bit stunned to hear the comments.

“She talks like she’s just Serena Williams,” Jankovic said. “Everybody had a right to say what she wants. I’m not really focused on Bartoli. She’s not like my biggest rival or someone I look up to or I’m scared of. She’s just one of the players on tour, not a big name, or someone who is making the big results or headlines in the game."

When she left the press conference to go for a doping test (something she wasn’t pleased about given that she might have to stay on site past midnight), Jankovic added with a smile, “Bartoli is going to get it tomorrow.”

It's enough to make me actually ditch work to watch a Mono match.  Hmmm...that's an idea...

Thursday's Results:
Singles - Second Round
(1) Serena Williams (USA) d. Melinda Czink (HUN) 63 76(7)
(2) Venus Williams (USA) d. (Q) Alla Kudryavtseva (RUS) 61 75
(4) Jelena Jankovic (SRB) d. Sabine Lisicki (GER) 26 62 64
(8) Marion Bartoli (FRA) d. (Q) Melanie Oudin (USA) 75 64

Doubles - Quarterfinals
(3) Mattek-Sands/Petrova (USA/RUS) d. Kleybanova/Rodionova (RUS/RUS) 64 46 1210
(4) Cirstea/Kirilenko (ROU/RUS) d. Coin/Pelletier (FRA/CAN) 63 63

Friday's OOP
Stadium (from 12.00hrs)
1. Hantuchova vs. Dementieva
2. S.Williams vs. Stosur (NB 14.00hrs)
3. Jankovic vs. Bartoli
4. Sharapova vs. V.Williams (NB 19.00hrs)
5. Black/Huber vs. Chan/Niculescu

Do. Not. Cross. Tranny.

I'm not entirely sure how this happened.  Well that's not true.  It happened because she's Mono and this is what she does.  #1 FedKAD was serving for the first set at 5-3 (I believe) and went on to lose 75 60. 

You do not. mess. with this.  Fact.

Pic This: Feel Good Edition.

Wow.  Those guys are really talented.  You really have to keep your head still.


I could just drink a whole bottle of vodka off that.  After I do my laundry, of course.


Uh...don't you have a "not feeling too good" wife to get to? 

Can't you survey your conquered kingdom another time?


Round 2, Phil.  Round 2.

Props to AiRon Woman.  She is a thousand years old, this is her gajillionth Slam, and she's into the third round.  Unfortunately she's going to have to crush the soul of her BFF in the next round.

Jesus, are they teaching everyone at the Bunny Ranch the Jackknife Pump?


I just can't get over that hair.  Seriously, kid, give you big brother my number, k?


So...I'm going to go out on a limb and say the competitive fire hasn't died.


I don't know why but pics of an exhausted Mono always crack me up.


Word.


Fair and balanced.


A smiling Dani will always warm the cockles of my cold dead soul. 

Or at least the black cavity where my soul used to be. 

Obligatory Nole shot for donkeygrooming, seeing as how her other two faves are now out of the tourney.

He covered up the GOATknuckle!  Mirka totally reads Forty Deuce, y'all.


Man.  Vika looks weird.

This totally endeared me to Tommy, who I have always felt bad for but never really felt *anything* for.  A really cool unscripted moment.

Ack!  Mirka shaved her head!!!

CanWoz Is Doping. You Heard It Here First.

Fantastic run for my favorite Canuck.  There's just something so damn likeable about her.  The French-Canadian-Polish accent, the perpetual smile, the little extra chub, the completely mismatched and out of season Adidas gear.  What's not to love?  So good on her for this impressive run.  Just goes to show that on fast(ish) surfaces, she's a dangerous lurker.  Remember what happened last year in Stanford?

So we get yet another Woz-Woz matchup.  I wonder if CanWoz was waiting courtside to give Caro a high five this time.  Yeah, probably not.  We all know how that worked out last time.

As for the other semi it'll be an all French affair (seriously, why can't you girls play on CLAY?).  I guess I'll go with the Gypsy on this one, mainly because she dumped A-Rad out today.  Can't wait to see Agi's artistic rendering of that one.

(6) Caroline Wozniacki (DEN) d. (Q) Ekaterina Makarova (RUS) 63 62
Virginie Razzano (FRA) d. (8) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) 76(5) 75
Marion Bartoli (FRA) d. Anabel Medina Garrigues (ESP) 61 64
Aleksandra Wozniak (CAN) d. (Q) Vera Dushevina (RUS) 61 60

Uh...Moving On To Wimbledon...

   

Boots, Mono, Gypsey, CanWoz, Dushevina, A-Rad, Makarova, and AMG.  These are your quarterfinalists at Eastbourne, a WTA Premier tournament and Wimbledon warmup.  Lena, Sam, Chak, Jay Z, and Momo all out today.  Nads and Nails had to retire with injuries.  Tough luck.

I don't mean to belittle the players that are left (go Boots, CanWoz, and A-Rad!) but this tourney sure took a hit on the marquee today.

Singles - Second Round

Virginie Razzano (FRA) d. (1) Elena Dementieva (RUS) 60 36 76(4)
(6) Caroline Wozniacki (DEN) d. Samantha Stosur (AUS) 61 57 61
(Q) Vera Dushevina (RUS) d. (7) Nadia Petrova (RUS) 57 10 ret. (right low back injury)
(8) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) d. Li Na (CHN) 31 ret. (left abdominal strain)
Marion Bartoli (FRA) d. Anna Chakvetadze (RUS) 75 63
Aleksandra Wozniak (CAN) d. Zheng Jie (CHN) 76(3) 63
Anabel Medina Garrigues (ESP) d. Sybille Bammer (AUT) 61 75

(Q) Ekaterina Makarova (RUS) d. Amélie Mauresmo (FRA) 76(8) 76(13)

Doubles - Quarterfinals
King/Zheng (USA/CHN) d. Dushevina/Voskoboeva (RUS/KAZ) 62 75
Amanmuradova/Sugiyama (UZB/JPN) d. (WC) Borwell/Keothavong (GBR/GBR) 76(3) 63

Doubles - First Round
(1) Black/Huber (ZIM/USA) d. (WC) Ivanovic/Lisicki (SRB/GER) 61 62
Husarova/Kirilenko (SVK/RUS) d. Craybas/Kudryavtseva (USA/RUS) 62 57 1917

As for the boys, Dima battled past Boggy to guarantee the possibility of a Dima/Nads Introduction to Eastbourne Pubs video.  So that's nice.

Singles - Second Round 
[2] D Tursunov (RUS) d [Q] A Bogdanovic 67(2) 64 76(5) 
D Istomin (UZB) d [6] S Querrey (USA) 36 76(3) 64 
L Mayer (ARG) d J Benneteau (FRA) 64 64 
[Q] F Dancevic d [WC] J Ward (GBR) 76(6) 64

Doubles - Quarter-finals 
T Parrott (USA) / F Polasek (SVK) d [2] M Bhupathi (IND) / M Knowles (BAH) 76(5) 64 
[3] B Soares (BRA) / K Ullyett (ZIM) d [WC] C Fleming (GBR) / K Skupski (GBR) 63 67(5) 10-7
J Coetzee (RSA) / J Kerr (AUS) d [4] M Mirnyi (BLR) / A Ram (ISR) 63 64
M Fyrsentberg (POL) / M Matkowski (POL) d L Arnold Ker (ARG) / M Kohlman (GER) 63 64  

Doubles - First Round
[3] B Soares (BRA) / K Ullyett (ZIM) d [WC] J Erlich (ISR) / J Murray (GBR) 46 76(6) 10-7

Air Quotes: Words Fail Me

Actually, I don't even know where to start with Mono's press conference from today.  But it's a must read.

Q. You said her attitude was a bit strange. What do you mean by this?
MARION BARTOLI: Well, it's her clan. When I made unforced errors, her team would shout. It's not sportslike. They're Italians.
Q. You're Italian too. Your grandfather, as well, is Italian.
MARION BARTOLI: I'm from Corsica.

...

Q. What next, then, for you?
MARION BARTOLI: I think there's something called Wimbledon next, so I'll try and get ready for grass. This is it. I'll practice again. That's the only thing I can do.
Q. Maybe you will not really like my question, but don't you think that it's something else that has to be changed when you contemplate a new tournament? It's time for a turn around for you.
MARION BARTOLI: Do you have ideas for me?
Q. Or your coach?
MARION BARTOLI: Oh, you mean changing coaches? You think my coach is really bad?

Grumpiest Opening Ceremonies Ever

Come on, Ladies.  You don't even have the jet lag excuse. 

And don't get me started on what Viko is trying to work there.  I know you're really excited to wear non-Dri-Fit clothes but that's not an excuse to wear every single piece of non-workout clothes you have.  That's at least 14 pages of InStyle crammed into one look. 


Heh.  Caption it in the comments.

Casper Books It

Shhhh...Don't scare the ghost...

Bepa the Baker destroyed Mono, winning 63 60 in about an hour.  She looked sharp, that's for sure.

She'll play the winner of tonight's Dokic/Dinara match.

Au Revoir

 

So that happened.

Numero Uno with a bullet, JJ, ran into the French firing squad that is the new slim and trim(ish) Mono Bartoli, losing somewhat listlessly, 61 64.  Everyone probably thought I was nutso to pick this as a possible upset match, but to me it was always a horrible matchup for JJ.  As much as Ricardo Sanchez keeps trying to convince the world otherwise, JJ's serve has not improved.  It's pure absolute puffball shit.  It's not world class.  Even Love All turned to me and said "Jesus, even you could serve harder than that."  Believe me, that's saying something.

And Mono may not be great if you can move her around on the baseline, but put her three feet behind the service box and give her a spinny sub 90mph serve, and she will hurt you.  And that's what she did to JJ.  She put too much pressure on JJ service games and broke her repeatedly, leaving JJ desperate to break back and just failing to play with intelligence or purpose.

But all credit to Mono.  JJ may claim that she "let" her player her game, but no way.  Mono just took the game to JJ and challenged her and JJ had no answers.  The key to her game today was her serve and her return of serve.  She dominated on both counts, which meant that even if the rallies went 50/50 or 70/30 to JJ, Mono still had the answers.  Good for her.

JJ's going to have to really look at this loss.  Sure, she can chalk it up to Mono's "lucky day" but if her team is worth anything they have to know that this match showed the world that despite all her claims to the contrary, her weaknesses are still very much there and attacakable.  Her serve has NOT gotten better, and her movement doesn't look particularly better either.   She seemed slow, though I don't know if that was her or the fact that Bartoli's shots made her look slow.  If I'm one of the other players on the tour I'm thinking she's the same old beatable JJ from 2008, and that all that hard work and extra muscle tone that she keeps bragging about just means she's more durable over the long run.  But the game is the same.

This Could Get Interesting

 

JJ and Mono came through today and will meet in the next round.  I'm really intrigued by this one.  Obviously you never know what you're going to get with Mono, and she hasn't exactly been dominating in the early rounds (she needed three sets to finish Lucie).  That said, she's fitter and we know she can cause problems for the top players. 

As for JJ, she's progressing through in straight sets, but the wins have never been convincing.  For all the talk about her getting stronger to get more pop on that serve, that thing is still a duck.  She's still extremely vulnerable on her own serve. 

I'm not saying Mono FTW.  But if JJ doesn't up her form dramaticaly, this isn't going to be a cakewalk.

"Who You Gonna Call? Ghostbusters!"

 
Two very different roads to the finals, but hey, a final it is.  Bepa manhandled a very exhausted Mono, 60 62.  Bepa is playing with such confidence and conviction, it's really great to see.  For whatever reason, I've always had a soft spot for her, so I'm psyched she's officially qualified for Doha. 

As for Ana, it was a typical Ana.  Absolutely on fire in the first set, let down in the second set, and a grind out third set.  She served horribly throughout the match (37% in the first set!) but when it counted in the third set and she absolutely had to hold, she didn't miss a first serve.  No doubt she's going to need to pick it up against Bepa.  Agi also deserves some props.  This is the best I've seen her play since Eastbourne.  Hopefully she uses the off season to work on her fitness.  She needs to get stronger.

One more note about the Ana/Agi match.  Why, oh why, can Ana not play aggressively ALL THE TIME.  There were flashes of that killer/angry instinct and then something would go wrong and she'd get distracted and have a let down.  Also, Ana had some great net play in the first and second set, but then she got tenative and stayed on the baseline in the third.  I have a feeling that of all the top players, Ana will benefit the most from on-court coaching next year. 

UPDATED -- Pic This: "High on a hill was a lonely goatherd, lay odl lay odl lay hee hoo"

UPDATED: More from the Linz Player Party

Tammy and Tamira (apparently Tamira has decided to embrace her Austrian citizenship.  At least for today.)

Agnes and Nads (EEK!)

Mono (apparently dressed as the sacraficial virgin)

Agi (anyone get the sense that Agi's got some anger issues to work out?)

Ana and Tamira (aww...no hard feelings)

(Updated pics courtesy of itzhak at TennisForum)

Always Nice to Hear Eurosport Giggle Like Little Boys

Here are the last two games of the AI vs. Bartoli match from today.  You can almost hear the commentators wishing they were the ball at 6:40.  The boys just can't help themselves.

US Open Day 7 Results: Not Quite Ready for Primetime Player

All credit and respect to 19 year old Marin Cilic.  What a performance.  Cilic was en fuego tonight, displaying an impressive combination of size and speed.  I knew Cilic was a big server, but I had no idea the boy had such great court coverage.  He was a brick wall tonight and he frustrated the heck out of Nole.  Some of those returns that he got back were pure magic.

As for Nole, overall he didn't play poorly (and he looked good in his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle gear).  But every time he had a chance to put the pedal to the metal, he blinked.  So many opportunities to break, consolidate breaks, etc., and he muffed a lot of them.  It wasn't until the fourth set tie-breaker that his experience bubbled to the surface and he was able to outclass a gassed Cilic to win the TB 7-0. 

But it wasn't his play that concerned me tonight.  It was his lack of emotion.  Nole plays better when he's on the edge emotionally and for some reason he was quite detached and reserved tonight.  One thought that crossed my mind was that he didn't want to incite the Serb/Croat undertones to the match.  A whooping and hollering Nole probably wouldn't have gone down well, especially in contrast to the mild mannered Cilic.

Here's hoping that Nole got this out of his system and can go forward with more fire.  He's got Disco Tommy next (who impressively took out Tsonga in straight sets) and then possibly Roddick, who also won in straight sets today, and Fed.  And that's just to get to the final!  Turtle Power!

How about Gilles Muller?  Talk about an underdog.  A qualifier from Luxembourg, he toppled yet another seed in a five set comeback, beating Nico Almagro 75 in the third.  He'll play Kolya next, who beat Tursonov in straights.

Is Lena D. the only one on the ladies' side not named Williams that can win in straight sets these days?  She is just plowing through the draw, dispatching a very solid Na Li, 4 and 1.  She looks dominant, people.  Get ready for a Lena D. vs. Serena final.  That's where I see it shaking out right now.

Apart from Lena, the only other storyline on the ladies' side is how open JJ's draw is getting.  You'd think it couldn't get any easier, but then Mono Bartoli had to go and lose to 28 year old mom Sybille Bammer.  They didn't show the Bartoli match on USA, but apparently she was like a test monkey out there, calling the trainer, getting her blood pressure taken, rubbed down, and otherwise lollygagging between points.  Of course, that didn't stop her from bageling Mama Bammer in the second set (maybe Bammer's maternal instinct kicked in and she wanted to run to Rite Aid to get Mono some Pedialyte?).  So JJ gets Bammer next and then most likely Lena in the semis, unless Peppermint Patty can pull off the upset in the next round.  Doubtful.

Non-Olympic tennis. Yes, it does exist.

In my crazy Olympic fever I've neglected to acknowledge that there are other non-Olympic happenings that are providing some interesting storylines as the US Open nears.  So here's a quick recap.

• Andy "I'm just not that into you, Olympics" Roddick loses to Juan Martin del Potro in the finals at LA.  This was shocking to say the least, especially because Andy cruised into the final.  He was serving well, moving well, and hitting solid strokes.  But by the time the final rolled around Andy was no match for the en fuego JMDP.  This is JMDP's third straight title and he ran Andy ragged.  JMDP has a lot of upside, though I'm not a huge fan of 30 foot service toss or his hitchy forehand.  But the Argentinian teenager has nerve.  He could have buckled when Roddick made a run in the second set but held his ground.  We'll see how this loss affects Andy in this week's DC tournament.  But for a guy who skipped the Olympics to be primed for the US Open, the loss was not encouraging.
• Mono Bartoli retires in the second set of her first round match against Jamea Jackson.  Let's think about this.  Bartoli hurt herself in the Stanford Final.  Two weeks later she plays Montreal and hurts herself again against Cibulkova.  Now she tried to play Cincy but is forced to retire.  Not the best decision making if you ask me.  Take the time off and get yourself fit, Marion, because clearly you are not.
• CrazySexyCool Safin retires in his opening round match in DC.  Don't know what's wrong with Marat (other than the usual mental stuff), but let's hope it doesn't affect his US Open run.

Marion Bartoli generous, spreading "mono" in Montreal.

Not really.  But apparently there's a virus going around the players in Montreal.

In her post-match press conference, Marion Bartoli said she felt horrible during her match this morning, had a fever and the shakes, and had to seek medical attention.  The trainers told her that 20 players already contacted them about experiencing flu-like symptoms and they are warning players to act as though they're playing in an anthrax infested stadium.  Don't share lollipops, no kissing in the locker room, and above all else, no playing with Marcel the Monkey.  And no, that was not a euphemism.  What are you, 12?

Ugh.  What a fustercluck.

Bartoli confuses "lack of fitness" with "mono".

On the heels of admitting that she cried endlessly after TMF lost to Rafa at Wimbly, now Marion Bartoli is saying that she was suffering from mono from January through Roland Garros. 

Riiiiight.

I saw Bartoli practicing at Indian Wells in March, and if she had mono she definitely wasn't acting like it.  She was doing all that weird "fitness" crap with her Dad in the dead heat for hours on the practice courts.  If you're body is breaking down because you're being overworked or because you lack fitness, that's not mono, honey.  Don't insult the Federers and the Ancics of the world who actually had to fight through that debilitating disease.

Week 29: Tourney Results

A fairly random and interesting week of results.  Szavay and Wozniaki crashed out of Bad Gastein, opening the door for Pauline Parmentier to prevail over a qualifier in the final. 

But more importantly, this week marked the first week of the Olympus US Open Series.  A few big names were in action (namely, James Blake, Serena Williams, and A Chak) but at the end of the day it was a couple of relative unknowns that hoisted the trophies.

 
Gilles Simon, who I had never seen play until today and who Jimmy Arias called "the most anonymous #25 in history, beat Dmitry Tursunov at Indianapolis.  Simon is a true counter-puncher who has a weak serve and no kill shot, but against Tursonov he was able to hang with the hard hitting Russian until Dima lost his patience and his nerve and started spraying UFEs everywhere.  Simon's reward?  A potential second round matchup with Roger in Montreal.

On the Ladies' side, I think everyone assumed that Marion Bartoli would walk all over the Aleksandra Wozniak, the Canadian qualifier.  But Wozniak hung in there and battled back to win the first set 75.  After that, the French Donut started to have some hip problems and hobbled all over the court.  On one hand, all credit to her (if the injury was real) to stay on the court and let Woz actually win the match.  On the other hand, it looked a little fake and at times, like gamesmanship.  I'll give Le Donut the benefit of the doubt though.

Despite Bartoli's difficulties, all credit to A Woz.  She came out with a simple gameplan, hit it deep and hit the corners, and she executed beautifully.  She also moved surprisingly well.  She'll move up to #45 now and if she can maintain her fitness and keep this level of play, there's no reason she shouldn't be a top #25 player.  She's solid.

Next Week:

• ATP: Rogers' Cup (Masters) in Toronto
• WTA: East West Bank Classic (Tier II) in LA

In Action

• All the guys will be in Toronto. 
• Jankovic, Kuznetsova, Serena (though doubtful), Vaidasova, Safina, and other top 20ers will be in LA.