Forty Deuce

Uninspired

That's me, trying to come up with something, anything, to say about things that happened in Linz and Osaka today.  Okay, I guess Sania had a nice win over Shahar.  I know it's not exactly an upset, given their head-to-head, but with their current rankings, Shahar's recent win streak, and all Sania's injury troubles, it is an outcome I was a little surprised to see.  Especially considering the last time I saw Sania, she was getting double bageled by Flava Flav at USO.

Also, Franny won.  Also, Makiri had to retire with a knee injury.  I can't even be bothered to look hard enough to find pictures.

Linz:

Singles - First Round
(4) Carla Suárez Navarro (ESP) d. Katarina Srebotnik (SLO) 62 64
Petra Kvitova (CZE) d. Andrea Petkovic (GER) 61 64
Urszula Radwanska (POL) d. (WC) Yvonne Meusburger (AUT) 76(6) 61
Ioana Raluca Olaru (ROU) d. Lucie Hradecka (CZE) 62 26 61

Osaka:

Singles - First Round
(4) Francesca Schiavone (ITA) d. Anne Kremer (LUX) 75 62
Sania Mirza (IND) d. (5) Shahar Peer (ISR) 36 63 64
(7) Melinda Czink (HUN) vs. (WC) Ryoko Fuda (JPN) 64 64
Mathilde Johansson (FRA) d. (8) Yaroslava Shvedova (KAZ) 75 26 75
Viktoriya Kutuzova (UKR) d. Maria Kirilenko (RUS) 62 ret. (knee injury)
Katie O'Brien (GBR) d. Alexa Glatch (USA) 63 64

Jigga Wha?

First she took out Kleybs, then Dani, and now MaKiri on her way to her first WTA final in...forever.

Fucking amazing!

Whoa.  When's the last time you've seen MaKiri in...sleeves?

Competition line FAIL.

Pic This: Fistpumps -- It's What's For Dinner

I'm starting to think that the WTA Glamour Girls aren't actually pretty. 

They just know how to put an outfit together. 

Dani looks great.  Tranny looks...confused.

Pic This: Hangover Edition

A lovely lazy Saturday morning.  I actually wish I could say I was hungover.  Then I'd have an better excuse than normal to lie on the couch under a blanket and watch tennis all day.

Nice run by Dani into the Round of 16.  I hope she's happy.

Yes, you have long limbs.  We get it.

The magic Comp Kit runs out of gas.  But a fantastic run for MaKiri.

Flying Jo.

10% pasta, 90% win.

Pic This: Muggy

Day 3 is in the books and the first rounds on both sides are complete.  

Hike up your socks, folks, it's just getting interesting.

Surrealism.

Still the best hair in tennis.

The WAGs are out in full force.

Happy and no headlights.  Win.

Do *Not* Fuck With The Competition Line

Take note, Boots. 

MaKiri sheds the weight of expectation and the 30lbs of unnecessary fabric to advance to the third round by beating #12 seed A-Rad, 64 26 64.  

Holy what?

Pic This: In Like A Lamb...

Day 1 is on its way into the books. 

And except for a few moments of stress, it was pretty snoozy.

 

Fed won easily, though Devon Britton, the young American, showed some stuff to be excited about.

 

Makiri won easily in her new Adidas Competition gear. 

Hmm...maybe it *was* the clothes.

 

Don't tell Aga, but that ain't a checkmark on her kit.

Just Short.

It was a day of strong challenges that fell just short as, for the most part (*cough*AnaAga*cough*) the seeds came through.  MaKiri stuck with JJ for much of the first set before she dropped the tiebreak 8-6.  From there, JJ took the second set 63 for the win.  But don't worry MaKiri, you still double bageled her and spat in her face at the net in the fashion department.

In the now-more-frequent-then-we'd-expect Woz/Woz match, Caro survived a scare from Aleks, dropping the first 46 before coming back to take the next two tight ones, 64 64.  Maybe Aleks is saving herself for Canadaland.

As for my favorite racquet smasher with a vagina (an important distinction so long as Marat is still playing), Bepa got 'sticked in the second by Kleybs and had to battle out the third to a 75 win.  Survive and move on, Casper.

As for A-Rad, how do you get bageled by Mama Bammer?  I think her new Babolat skirt distracted her.  She's never seen a logo before.

Singles - Second Round
(4) Elena Dementieva (RUS) d. (Q) Yanina Wickmayer (BEL) 63 64
(5) Jelena Jankovic (SRB) d. (WC) Maria Kirilenko (RUS) 76(6) 63
(7) Vera Zvonareva (RUS) d. Alisa Kleybanova (RUS) 64 16 75
(8) Caroline Wozniacki (DEN) d. Aleksandra Wozniak (CAN) 46 64 64
(9) Victoria Azarenka (BLR) d. Anna Chakvetadze (RUS) 64 62
Melinda Czink (HUN) d. (11) Ana Ivanovic (SRB) 76(6) 75
Sybille Bammer (AUT) d. (13) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) 60 75
(14) Flavia Pennetta (ITA) d. Agnes Szavay (HUN) 62 64
Sorana Cirstea (ROU) d. Anna-Lena Groenefeld (GER) 63 62
Daniela Hantuchova (SVK) d. Alona Bondarenko (UKR) 75 16 64
Peng Shuai (CHN) d. María José Martínez Sánchez (ESP) 57 62 61
(WC) Kim Clijsters (BEL) d. Patty Schnyder (SUI) 62 75

Doubles - First Round
Kirilenko/Vesnina (RUS/RUS) d. Chuang/Yan (TPE/CHN) 64 60

MaKiri + Aga = Hilarity

Yan and Chuang somehow survived this...

To get this:

Congrats to them because they totally deserved it, bageling MaKiri and Agi in the first set and them taking the super-tiebreak.

These two somehow win doubles matches despite the fact that Aga insists on trying to be the "better doubles player" but kinda sucks.  MaKiri on the other hand is just a quintessential doubles player.  She just has such great court sense.  But then Aga decides that she'd like to run across the net to poach a ball she has no business poaching and leaving the cross court wide open.

But they're still hilarious to watch.  It's weird to think what the hell these two have to talk about but they're actually quite talkative with each other.  And MaKiri smiles quite a bit when she's playing with Agi.  I think they're planning to play together in Cincy.  MaKiri said that since they've been playing together they keep making finals so they'll just keep on going.

Pic This: We Do The Mash

Big Masha practicing with Lil' Masha at Stanford.


Love the dude trying to ignore those short-shortedness that's going on right in front of him.

STELLLLLAAAAA!!!

On your marks, get set, go!

Oh, and to add insult to injury, MaKiri's being moved over to Dinara's asexual Competition Line.  I guess Ana and Sorana will be the only ones holding down the Adilibria line.

Read more about it at TSF.

MaKiri Likes Them Hairy

MaKiri is blogging from Bastad this week.  Here's a couple of cute bits from her blog:

The best thing [about the player's party] came at the end. There was a magician who was doing some really funny tricks with some of the players, and Caroline Wozniacki had to kiss him for him to do the final trick, and when she did, he pulled a card out of his mouth! It was really funny.

There was one other funny thing I've done here... I did an interview with a men's fashion magazine and they were asking me how I felt about men who take a lot of time to make themselves look nice, and then they asked me about men who shave their legs... I said for me, it's not a very manly thing to do! Haha. I know they're trying to look very nice but for me, I guess men should just have hairy legs.

Doesn't Igor wax his chest?  Am I wrong on that?

Why Must You Torture Me, Tennis Gods?

Bye bye, Pavsy.  You lost to MaKiri in straight sets.  I don't know what to say to that other than it was her best surface and maybe you were distracted by the awesomeness that is her Stella McCartney kit.

Oh well.  Go MaKiri!

And in the other upset of the day (and I mean "upset" because I am upset), Olivia Newton John beat Sorana in three sets.  This, I am not ok with.  And no, boys, they did not just start making out and rolling around on the clay together.  Sorry to disappoint.

Fashion Fight! Fashion Fight! Fashion Fight At Lunch!

The Stella McCartney showdown took place on Center Court (?) between old Stella model MaKiri and new Stella model SkiBoots.  And since a catwalk wasn't actually involved this one proved spectacularly uninteresting at Boots dusted the MaK, 0 and 4.

But if a catwalk had been involved I think MaKiri would have dished out some bagels.  Yes, Stella, Boots will guarantee that your clothes are seen more often at tournaments.  No doubt.  But MaKiri looks so graceful and elegant when she hits the ball that the pics from her matches are basically a catalogue (minus J Peterman descriptions, which is a shame). 

That said, she's adorable and I'm sure your clothes will look amazing in all the trophy ceremony pictures. 

Clearly All That Fashion Was Weighing Her Down

Gotta love it.  MaKiri actually wins a match but now that she's no longer wearing Stella there are no pictures of it anywhere.  But at least she won.  Bethanie, Cone, and Chak all crashed out *and* there are no pics of them. 

But now let's not wallow in the negative.  Let's give some love to some of my favorite B-Listers:

Melanie Oudin notched a three set win over #29 seed Sybille Bammer.  Well done, kid.

Wimbledon frontrunner, Slammin' Sammy Stosur, needed three sets to take out Bethanie.  Sad that B-Matt had to take one for the team here but, "Sammy Sammy Sammy, Oi Oi Oi!"

And Nails kept it classy in covering up her tat and tossed a bagel Voskoboeva's way. 

Go China!

Stella McCartney Decides She'd Like Her Clothes To *Actually* Be On Display

 
In case you missed it, Stella McCartney for Adidas has dumped MaKiri and is going to go with Ski Boots.  You can't blame Stella.  Does anyone around here know what her current line even looks like? 

Sorry, MaK.  Looks like it's back to Adilibria for you.  Stella don't just give that shit away.  You gotta earn it.

Same Ol', Same Ol.

The Shazz and the Shoulder returned to England victoriously, beating Stephanie Dubois 4 and 2.  She'll play Alexa Glatch next, who "upset" Bethanie 76 63.  That's juicy.

Different day, same result.  Makiri looked great in her Stella, still lost to a lower ranked player, this time U-Rad. 

Singles - First Round
Alexa Glatch (USA) d. (9) Bethanie Mattek-Sands (USA) 76(2) 63
Urszula Radwanska (POL) d. (10) Maria Kirilenko (RUS) 63 63
(12) Tamarine Tanasugarn (THA) d. Julie Coin (FRA) 76(1) 61
(13) Magdalena Rybarikova (SVK) d. Akgul Amanmuradova (UZB) 64 64
(14) Roberta Vinci (ITA) d. Severine Brémond (FRA) 63 62
Yanina Wickmayer (BEL) d. Anastasija Sevastova (LAT) 64 63
Jarmila Groth (SVK) d. Vania King (USA) 64 64
Maria Sharapova (RUS) d. Stéphanie Dubois (CAN) 64 62
Olga Govortsova (BLR) d. Chan Yung-Jan (TPE) 76(7) 62
Melanie South (GBR) d. (WC) Katie O'Brien (GBR) 64 16 76(5)
(WC) Elena Baltacha (GBR) d. (WC) Georgie Stoop (GBR) 63 64
(WC) Naomi Cavaday (GBR) d. Julie Ditty (USA) 62 76(2)

Blink And You'll Miss Them

They came, they saw, they said "Nah...I'm over this."

Too bad.  Makiri's white and purple Stella number looks, as always, rad.  And what's up with Chakky's overheatedness?  Did the pink skirt bring out the color in her face?

Love ya, Bethanie.  But is that skirt made of basketball short material?  Just checking.

Oh, Flavs.  Sadness.  More sad?  The fact that Sergio Tachnini NEVER gives you anything fun or cool to wear.  Would it kill them to migrate away from the navy blue pallette?

More IW Stalkerazzi Footage

I'm starting to feel like I'm the Perez Hilton/TMZ of Indian Wells.  That makes me very very sad.  Oh well.

More random video from around the grounds this week:


Hint to Dina: Kuzzie will totally be friends with you if you would stop noshing for a second and say hello. It's the little things, girl.

>br> Rafa getting swarmed by fans after his win over Elf yesterday. He proceeded to hit the practice courts for some more reps. I guess he wanted to burn off those cookies.


Vika goes down 2-5 against Bepa.


Cahill and Mats hitting with Ski Boots. Gotta love the idiots behind me who thought he was Lleyton Hewitt.


MaKiri watching Igor beat Jo.


Marat says goodbye to Indian Wells.


Match point.

Random Smatterings From Around The IW Grounds

I will always, always, always love Agi's "who farted" face.  It pwns.

 
Rafa's butt.

Muzz looking good in red while practicing with a shirted (!) Ross.

The Kaiser of Techno trying to jog off his loss to Fer.

Dani heading to practice.

MaKiri noshing on a Drumstick while on her way to watch Igor play Lubey.

"Is now a good time for an autograph?  Oh you can't hear me?  Cool."

New Forty Deuce fave Anastasia Pavlychenkova.  That's the last time you'll see me spell that.  She shall heretoforth be known as "Latisha".  Look it up.

Momes having a grand ole time, playing soccer and pulling a Chastain.

(Pics for Forty Deuce by Love All and C Note)

Pretty FTW!

Just took the first set. Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

MaKiri Cheers On Her Man

And she's wearing the raddest Stella McCartney jacket ever. And silver Adidas kicks. Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

Pic This: Hey Look! It's The Masha That's Still In The Tourney.

Pic This: New BFFs?

Posing sopping wet in bikinis together will do that to you.

Yay Igor! Aw...Igor.

From MaKiri's SI Interview

Do real guys have a shot?

Sorry, this place is no longer vacant.

The world's hottest athlete is...

Portuguese footballer Cristiano Ronaldo

Also, this cracked me up because I don't think she's being ironic, sarcastic, or kidding at all:

People have said that I look like...

Not sure who do I look like, but people say I look like a princess.

Pic This: Masha Mash Up

For All The Marat Love You Had To Endure

I now give you the WTA ladies of SI.  Mind you, I'm drafting this post with my office door open.  Risky.  Very Risky.

I had heard about this shoot a few months ago but I didn't know that Dani was participating.  I mean, Tati, sure.  What else does she have on her schedule other than smoking and hanging out at cafes.  And of course MaKiri is the go-to glamour Masha on tour who doesn't say no to stuff like this.  But good for Dani.  I still want to feed her a sandwich or four though.

The full set of pictures can be seen at SI's site.  There's also video.  A look at the pics makes a few things clear.  Dani will not smile, Tati will not keep her clothes on, and MaKiri is way cuter on the tennis court.  That last one I'm sure the boys will disagree with but her whole spread (ahem) wasn't all that spectacular. 

Tati's the most natural of all of them.  Girl takes a good picture.  Though really, are we that surprised?  She's French, which means she likes getting naked and hates people flipping her off.

 

 

 

 

 

Soak It In Boys, Cuz This Is All You're Gonna Get

MaKiri got dumped by Sara Errani, 60 64.  I love the color combo on the new Stella dress.  Hate the doily embellishments at the hem.


Not that the guys are looking at either the colors of the hem anyway.



Gotta give her credit though.  She was throwing everything at Errani to try to distract her:

Sydney Practice Pics (100% Guaranteed Radek-Free)

Ah, Makiri.  The Anti-Radek.


All eyes are on Nole and his head/Head in Sydney.  So it's nice to see him hitting the courts hard.





I mean, when is Dani NOT practicing. 


I'm not going to lie.  Nalby's blonde 5 o'clock shadow always creeps me out.


The Airon woman, still going strong.

Ladies Roundup: Wednesday

Maria Kirilenko is quite the conundrum.  Well, I guess the Cone is kinda nutso too.  But seriously, Lil Masha, winning the first set 61 and then losing the match 16 62 61?  That's not right.  I'm so curious to know what the hail happened.

Otherwise, a pretty uneventful day in Linz.  A-Rad beat Kanepi in straight sets, Flava Flav beat Agnes in straights, and in the two marginally surprising results, Mama Bammer beat Tranny and Kvitova dusted homegirl Tamira Paszek.

Over in Luxembourg, Chakky failed to even match Baby Ana's result from yesterday, failing to take a set off Benesova and losing listlessly in straight sets, 62 64.  And thus ends Chakky's horrible year.  Here's again hoping she gets it together.  Other than Chakky, all the seeds came through, with Dani scoring a nice win over Lisiki 60 62, and Ski Boots, Na Li, Cirstea, and Momo also winning.

So, OOP for Thursday, where the top seeds in both tourneys will be in action (Ana and Lena):

Linz:
Centre Court (from 14.00hrs)
1. Llagostera Vives vs. Zvonareva
2. Cibulkova vs. Pennetta
3. Ivanovic vs. Bammer (NB 16.00hrs)
4. Srebotnik vs. Petrova
5. A.Bondarenko vs. Schnyder (NB 20.15hrs)

Show Court (from 14.00hrs)
1. Bartoli vs. Kvitova

Luxembourg:
1. Medina Guerrigues vs. Castano (12.30hrs)
2. Dementieva vs. Dulko
3. Groenefeld vs. Mauresmo

MaKiri's Revenge

That pic is just making me laugh and laugh and laugh.

Hottie Bowl 08 was another tight one (hah!) but in the end (hah!) MaKiri won 75 62, sending SuperGirl home to think about the year that might have been (hah...no wait, that didn't work).

In other news, Vika slammed the door on Momo's not-so-great season, 62 61, and in the battle of players who seem like they should be better than they actually are, Alona Bonderenko overcame The Cone in three sets, 16 63 76(6).

After the standard set by today's hotness, tomorrow's OOP is looking decidedly "not hot."  But I'm sure the quality of tennis will be high.  Maybe.  Eh, except for the Dushevina and Woz matches, probably not.

Centre Court (from 14.00hrs)
1. Bartoli vs. Szavay
2. Niculescu vs. Chakvetadze (NB 15.15hrs)
3. Schnyder vs. Kvitova (NB 18.00hrs)
4. Dushevina vs. A.Radwanska (NB 20.30hrs)

Court 2 (from 13.00hrs)
1. Wozniacki vs. Schiavone
2. Medina Garrigues vs. Li (NB 18.30hrs)

Form an Orderly Queue, Gentlemen.

Tomorrow's OOP for Zurich:

Centre Court (from 12.00hrs)
1. Groenefeld vs. Kvitova (Singles Q Final)
2. A.Bondarenko vs. Cornet (NB 14.00hrs)
3. Hantuchova vs. Kirilenko (NB 18.00hrs)
4. Mauresmo vs. Azarenka

Court 2 (from 12.00hrs)
1. Sugiyama vs. Dushevina (Singles Q Final)
2. Arvidsson vs. Benesova (Singles Q Final)
3. Niculescu vs. K.Bondarenko (Singles Q Final)

Here's a preview for the boys:

It's amazing to look back and see the type of shotmaking Dani is capable of.

Trophy Hoister Sunday: JJ, Andy, Jo, and MaKiri

A nice little weekend for tennis, I thought.   

Let's start in China.  Where it was 57 degrees at the start of the match.  But JJ summoned the power of Burberry to steamroll Sveta, 63 62.  Was there any doubt that JJ would win?  As loyal Forty Deuce commenter CMS said, "Well since JJ can't get #1 with the title here, my money's on her."  So true, CMS.  So true.

There's nothing flashy about JJ's game to me, but it's just solid.  Her game consists of getting balls back and not missing.  She figures out how to get it done and one thing that I will always tip my cap to her for is her ability to read the game and construct points (unless under stress in which case she loses it a bit).  JJ never looks like she's actually that fast but before you know it, she's on the ball.  She anticipates really well in, in the way that Roger's quickness is very much tied to his anticipation.

Back to back finals for Kuzzie, so that's gotta feel good.  But her finals record now goes to 1 and 11 over the past two years. 

As for Andy, a really solid performance, winning 64 67 63.  He was tested but he was serving well and playing his weird "power pusher" game.  As for Dudi Sela, dude (hah!), you hung with the big boys this week.  Good on you.  Hope this win gives Andy some momentum going into the indoor season and the YECs.

 
Over in Thailand, revenge is sweet (though, I don't know WHAT is going on in that pic), as Jo won 76 64.  Isn't it hard to believe that this is Jo's first singles title?  Ever?  I didn't see the match but given the scoreline, it looks like it was a really tight one that was probably decided by 2 or 3 key points. 

Another tough runner-up loss for Nole, who is still working to recapture that swagger on the court that got him his first Grand Slam title.  He's playing well, he just doesn't have that X-Factor that allows him to kick it up a notch.  But it's always nice to see that smile (standing there with good buddy Paradorn Schiripan).  Does anyone get the sense that Nole doesn't mind losing to people he likes?  Maybe I'm just making it up in my head, but his recent losses to Muzzah and Jo come to mind.


Finally, in Seoul, the ugly Stella dress that hangs off Maria Kirilenko threatened to tag her with its bad mojo (though it looks great in that pic), but MaKiri recovered from dropping the first set to dominate the rest of the match, winning  26 61 64.  Yay, Lil Mash!

Bonus: Ski Boots won a doubles title!

Pic This: MaKiri Has Stuff To Say, Dudes Could Not Care Less.

Yay, Adidas!!! You did it!!! High Five!

You made Maria Kirilenko, #1 hottie of the WTA Tour, look horrible!  She looks like Courtney Love back in her Hole days.  The only thing missing is a bottle of Jack and a cigarette. 

To quote Rich from Down The Line: "I'm not even sponsored by adidas and I want to leave."

Baby Elephant Forgets The ONE Rule of Packing: Jersey. No Silk.

Yay!  Pictures from the Tokyo Players' Press Conference Extravaganza!  Is it just me or should the WTA should out a memo to players telling them EXACTLY what the dress code is.  I mean, Ana, Dinara, and Lena look like they're going to a cocktail party, Ai Sugiyama looks like she's going to a business meeting, Dani and JJ look like they're in St. Bartz, Momo, Domi, and Agnez look like they're going to the mall, Francesca Schiavone looks like she's going to a concert, and Na Li is wearing army capris. 

I find Ana's attempts to dress up adorable because she clearly has no idea what she's doing.  It's so relatable.

Oh, honey.  You so need a Best Gay.  Because here's what my Best Gay would say: "Oh my gosh.  What.  Are.  You.  Thinking?  You cannot pack a silk dress and then put it on without steaming it first!  And don't tell me you "steamed it" by hanging it in the bathroom while the shower was running.  Because that shit is a LIE.  It doesn't work.  And honey, if you're going to wear heels, you need to OWN IT.  Don't fucking slouch down like you're embarrassed you're so tall and hot.  It's not your fault they decided to put some midget next to you.  Augh!  I don't even know why I'm friends with you.  Sometimes, it's embarrassing!  Cute Prada clutch though!"

Don't worry, Ana.  You're not the only one to suffer the Silk Faux Pas last week:

So you're in good company.

Uh, this picture is AMAZING.  Why?  Ok, I do this all the time.  I'll be dressed up for a wedding or something and I'll just be sitting there minding my own business, zoning off on some random thought, and without thinking, I relax, slouch down a bit, and then RELAX MY ABS SO THAT MY GUT IS TOTALLY HANGING OUT.  Because yes, I (and apparently Ana) have to think about it to make sure my gut doesn't hang out.  I have said it once and I will say it again: BABY ELEPHANT RULES!!!

AI and Company sharing what looks like a very genuine laugh about something.  You know, for someone who is French and therefore ostensibly up to date (whether she likes it or not) on fashion trends, the fact that Momo still wears a scrunchy baffles me. 

But honestly, everyone looked pretty good:

When will the WTA learn?  You put MaKiri in the front row.  It doesn't matter what her ranking is, it doesn't matter how successful she is, it doesn't matter if she's even there to play.  Front Row.  Always.  Come on!

Air Quotes: Way to kick a girl when she's down.

 

      

           "I think Kirilenko, in all honesty, is up a set and a break"

-- Robby Koenig, during last night's Stepanek/Andreev match, when asked by Jason Goodall who was winning the off-court battle of WTA girlfriends.  Both Nicole and Radek lost yesterday.

Thanks to Rachael from TennisWorld for the quote.