Forty Deuce

Thanks, Japan.

I'm finally back in the Bay Area after a five week jaunt from Indian Wells, Miami, and then to Tokyo to visit my sister for a week.  It was another long stretch of 2011 wherein I lived out of my suitcase, relying on the generosity of others.  Thanks others!  You were so generous!

Anyway, this isn't a travel blog so I'll make this short and sweet.  Tokyo was absolutely amazing.  Just...everything about it was fascinating.  The Japanese are such a strong, noble, classy, no-nonsense people.  Of course as tennis fans, we already know this.  Kimiko's got more class and grit in her cute little haircut than both tours combined.  Kei, I was totally rooting for you, dude.  And Ayumi...sometimes you remind me of my kid sister and it makes me happy.

All this is to say, go to Tokyo if you get the chance.  It's pretty much ridiculously safe.  I was there on the 31st floor of a residential high-rise during the 7.4 aftershock and seriously, the building creaked a bit and that was it.  Nothing fell, no pets were harmed, and 30 minutes later, I went back to sleep.  Considering the fact that Loma Prieta (the 1989 Bay Area quake) was a smaller quake and like, freeways collapsed and San Francisco was on fire, Tokyo's preparedness was pretty fucking amazing.  Besides, refusing to go to Tokyo these days because of safety concerns is like refusing to go to San Francisco after an earthquake hits Fresno. 

I'm not saying go to Sendai with your surfboard or head up to Fukushima and ask for a tour of the reactor core or anything.  But Tokyo itself is fine and so worth going to.  I was there for a week and I still felt like there was so much more to see.  Mind-blowing food, fantastic cafes, and three-story secret bars that only accomodate 10 people.  How could any of that suck?

So yeah.  Everybody chill out about Tokyo.  I'm already scrounging pennies in order to try and finance a trip in September for the Toray Pan Pacific Open. 

Last, I will share with you this tennis-nerd idiocy.  I was walking around the city with my sister:

Me:  This intersection looks familiar.

Sister:  Oh, it's pretty famous.  There are pictures of it everywhere.

Me:  No...I don't think I've seen a picture of it.

Sister:  Really?

Me: Oh.  Nevermind.

Sister: What?

Me: Nothing.  Well, there's a video of Ana Ivanovic crossing this intersection.  That's where I saw it.

Sister: ...

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand scene.

(Pics: Getty)

Pic This: To the Dearly Departed.

We just didn't have enough time together.  Makes me way emo.

Good Lookin' and Lookin' Good.

The faves were looking sharp today and in the case of Rafa and Muzz, they saw their draw potentially open up.  After falling behind an early break to Hajek, Muzz turned on the afterburners, blitzing his way to an easy and very fun to watch straight set win.  It was a sexy performance and one I haven't seen in quite a long time.  Andy was attacking his returns, cracking backhand winners, and dictating play with his forehand.  Lovely stuff and hopefully an omen of good things.  The other good news for him: a gassed Fernando was upset by FaBrows Fognini.  Then again, Andy would probably rather play Fer on grass than Jo, who notched a four set win.  So...six in one, I suppose.

Rafa notched a fairly straightforward win over Project 45, who, I thought, acquitted himself well.  Kei didn't roll over, instead making tactical adjustments as the match progressed to give himself a chance.  I was impressed and I hope the kid stays injury free.  Incidentally, my sister, who's been living in Tokyo for the past year and is in town for a visit, informed me that it's not "Cup 'o Noodles".  It's just "Cup Noodles".  Check the package next time.  This totally blew my mind.

I love love LOVE Masha's kit.  Love the jacket, love the dress, and love that she dished a stick and bagel while wearing it.  As for Serena, well, her tennis was dominant.  She fired down 15 aces.  And thankfully she left that piece of fabric on her shoulders in her bag while she played.  All I know is that while Serena makes me want to donate blood, I feel like hiring Masha to sue the shit out of Serena for fucking up the donation procedure.  

But this is a tennis blog and I know you tune in to hear my always insightful analysis.  So here it is:

These four players played good.

Fin.

Churnin' Butter

Oh I've missed you and your legendary Ho!Yay!

I'm a bit busy with some personal stuff this week (don't worry, it's nothing serious or anything) so I apologize for falling behind on the blogging.  To be honest, I normally don't feel bad about it (because I'm a dick) but seeing as how Wimbledon starts in less than a week, I feel particularly derelict in my responsibilities to you, the sometimes-loyal-but-would-totally-stab-me-in-the-back reader.

Thankfully there are other great tennis bloggers who aren't ignoring the tennis.  I don't really like churning links, but again, it's the week before Wimbledon and I feel like if I don't set the table for all the jokes I plan to drop in the next couple of weeks, well, the jokes will fail.  And nothing pisses me off more than someone making unfunny jokes especially when that someone is me.

So here's my churnalistic attempt to get you caught up with the goings on in Yellow Ball Land.  And by "Yellow Ball Land" I mean tennis, not Asian porn.  Get your head out of the gutter and into the game, pervies.

• Uncle Jamie throws his Wimbly thoughts out into the information superhighway.  You should read it because I always agree with him.  Except for the times when I don't.
• Stephanie Myles, thankfully, breaks down how the Wimbledon seeds are calculated for the ATP side.  Why did she feel compelled to Mathnet?  Because Fed has been seeded #1 and the Twitterverse had a cow.  And by Twitterverse I mean me because I was apparently the only one in the world who didn't know that the formula only applies to the ATP, not the WTA.  My thoughts in a nutshell: I don't really care that Fed's #1.  It had no effect on the draw.  It's more symbolic than anything else, you know, like THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND.  But what does annoy me is that this formula isn't used for the ladies.  Think about it and you will come to the same conclusion that I did: Wimbledon hates Venus.
• C Note read at Down The Line that Franny is referring to herself in the third-person.  C Note thinks it's just...weird. 
• GoToTennis sat on a conference call with Brad and Mary and didn't bother asking whether there would be a "Big Babe Tennis 2: Electric Buggaloo" installment this year.  Also they both pick Rafa to win.  Where was Aunty Pimmy?!?
• I love Andy Murray.  Just thought I'd mention it.
• Vika and Sveta won back to back matches.  That seems like news.
• You don't want to know how this makes me feel, Roger.
• Best. Coach. EVAH.
• Sam just wants to make the fourth round at Wimbledon.  Now if people could please stop paying attention to her, I'd appreciate it.  Thanks.  Meanwhile, she's doing ok on grass so far, making the quarters of Eastbourne against Elena Baltacha.
• Boom Boom Sabine is out of Wimbledon.
• Great piece on Shazza in The Guardian.
• JJ's boxing.  If JJ doesn't like fistpumps in her face, I can't think she's a fan of fists in her face.  Also, "WATCH THE NOSE!"
• Welcome back, Kimmy.  I see you've left your mercy in Belgium.
• Thanks to Jane Peng for getting Boyfriend to link to my Rafa piece.  That's how the Kong rolls.
• WTA Boo Boo Boo Watch: MaKiri retired with an ab injury; Aravane retired with a right wrist injury; Nails also retired.
• ATP Boo Boo Boo Watch: Nico retired with a right hip injury; Feli retired two points from losing with some sort of injury, I'm thinking it was either a brain injury or World Cup fever; Special Kei also retired.
• Via Twitter, Nalby announced he's not playing Wimbledon.  So enjoy your crumpets as per yoosh.
• I would like to be introduced to these "people" who thought it was the coolest thing they'd ever seen.  Seriously, Serena.  I want a list.  Tweet it.  
• Oh, and Rafa's in Mallorca hanging with Xisca.  And probably crying.  A lot.

And that's the news I care about.  Oh, Ana lost to PetKo.  Shit happens.  Moving on.

Pic This: RG Day 2

It was a warm on in Paris today.  And the heat brought out the crazy.

It's not so much that Feli likes to show leg, it's that his legs refused to be contained.

 

I'm flattered by the offer, but no.

Oh no you di'n't, JJ.  Allison will cut you.  She'll do it.

DonotlookherintheeyeDonotlookherintheeyeDonotlookherintheeye...

Fuck!  Too late.

More after the jump.

Thursday @ IW: Andy's Special, Bethanie's Back, and Masha's Homeless

You Win Some, You Lose Some

 
Fun times at the SAP Open last night.  Of course, it could have been a lot more fun if Ernie didn't serve like a moron, but whatever. 

 

Love All and I sat third row courtside, right by the player's entrance.  The row in front of us was empty and a number of players came out to watch and sat right in front of us. 

We were right behind Canas and Ginepri, and Haas and Querrey also hung around.  That was kinda cool.

The matches were drama filled for stupid reasons, primarily related to the poor line calling.  Elf went a little nuts on the umpire in the second set, slamming his racquet into the padding by the umpire's chair.  He then went off to sulk at the back of the court.  Sensing this as my moment, I yelled "Vamos!" pretty loudly (there weren't that many JMDP fans in the arena) .  All of a sudden Elf started spouting off in Spanish for a good 15-20 seconds.  I have no idea what he said but I'd like to believe that my well-timed "Vamos!" instigated it.

Elf is damn impressive to watch live.  The kid is tall and not as lanky as he seems on TV.  He's seems sturdier.  And boy can he cover the court.  I have no idea how he doesn't trip over those legs of his, but it's impressive.

 
As for Ernie/Andy, it really came down to Ernie just serving like crap.  Couldn't get a first serve in to save his life in the first set, and he couldn't get a second serve in a few times, throwing in back to back double faults eary in the first set. Twas a real shame he couldn't make more of a match of it.  There were about 4 of us in the crowd rooting for him.  Again, I got a lot of weird looks from the people sitting around us whenever I cheered for Ernie.

Andy was Andy.  His serve is ridiculous when you're sitting that close.  Seriously, you can't see the ball. 

The Andy/Ernie match ended on a weird note.  Andy served an ace that Ernie thought was out.  They had some words at the net and kept glaring at each other while they were packing up their things.  During his post-match interview Andy was asked what was said, to which he replied "Pleasantries.  You know it's Valentine's Day" or something to that effect.  Charming to some I'm sure.  Not to me.

You're not as funny as you think you are, Andy.  Just sayin'.

Capped off the night with a nice In 'n Out run.  Fun times.  Hopefully, depending on who makes the semis and final, I'll make it down there again this weekend.

Here are links to the rest of the pics:

http://tinyurl.com/am5fny
http://tinyurl.com/d3vkre
http://tinyurl.com/ajkjdr

I hope they work.  Let me know if they don't.

Here were the scores out of San Jose:

[1] A Roddick (USA) d E Gulbis (LAT) 63 76(3)
[2] J Del Potro (ARG) d K Nishikori (JPN) 62 62
[3] J Blake (USA) d F Serra (FRA) 64 63
[5] M Fish (USA) d [WC] J Isner (USA) 62 67(4) 75
[6] S Querrey (USA) d D Gremelmayr (GER) 63 62
[Q] T Widom (USA) d T Dent (USA) 67(5) 63 62

That's a lot of red, white and blue.

Young and Old Gather In The 'Ho

 

The SAP Open in San Jose kicked off yesterday and Pete Sampras shook the dust off his Pro Staff to show the packed crowd what it kinda sorta looked like when he used to play, if he was slower, less flexible, less explosive, and wasn't as good.  He was supposed to play Blah in the exo but Blah, ironically, had to pull out due to a sore back.  So in stepped Tommy Haas.

What is this, 2002?


The night session was capped with Special K taking on the ever annoying Gilles Muller.  Kei took him out in straight sets, 75 62.

Scores:
[4] Radek STEPANEK (CZE) d [Q] Dominik MEFFERT (GER) 5-7 6-3 6-1
Christophe ROCHUS (BEL) d [7] Igor KUNITSYN (RUS) 6-2 7-6(7)
Tommy HAAS (GER) d [WC] Loerschke POERSCHKE (GER) 6-1 7-6(8)
Taylor Dent (USA) d Bobby REYNOLDS (USA) 6-3 6-4
Florent SERRA (FRA) d Jarkko NIEMINEN (FIN) 7-5 6-7(1) 6-4
Kei NISHIKORI (JPN) d Gilles MULLER (LUX) 7-5 6-2
Denis GREMELMAYR (GER) d Roko KARANUSIC (CRO) 3-6 7-6(4) 6-2

Asia In Da House!

It started out as a rough day for Team Asia, as we saw Project 45 go down listlessly to the douchestamped Melzer.  The kid just didn't look right all match and I wonder how much of it had to do in the drop in confidence because of the arm injury that forced him out of Auckland last week.  He lost 75 62 61.

But the ladies kept their end of the bargain.  The un-Nike'd Zheng Jie won in straights over Camille Pin, 63 63.  And Shuai Peng scored a bit of an upset when she beat Tranny Schiavone 76 61.

Too bad Na Li isn't here. 

Auckland Roundup: Day 2

Over in Auckland, Sammy, Viktor, and Robbie all won.  For a split second I thought Robbie beat Jason Statham.  Alas, it was Jose Statham.  Less hot.

But in bad news, Special Kei had to retire with an elbow injury against Juan Carlos Ferrero.  Hope he gets himself healed for the AO.

(As aside, it totally is an Asian thing.  Kei has the racquet too.)

Scores:
[6] S Querrey (USA) d [WC] D King-Turner (NZL) 64 75
J Ferrero (ESP) d K Nishikori (JPN) 53 ret. (right forearm)
V Troicki (SRB) d I Kunitsyn (RUS) 61 62
R Ginepri (USA) d [WC] J Statham (NZL) 62 63

Wilsons Are Good Racquets

Jo started his 2009 campaign off right, beating Calleri, 62 75.

I don't know what it is, but Jo looks different.  Shorter hair?  Gained weight?  Lost weight?  I really don't know what it is.

As for the rest of the night session in Brisbane, Special Kei got a nice win over Bobby Reynolds, and Reeeshard and The Evil One also won.

Here are your scores:
[2] J Tsonga (FRA) d A Calleri (ARG) 62 75
[4] R Soderling (SWE) d J Benneteau (FRA) 63 63
[7] R Gasquet (FRA) d T Dent (USA) 75 64

There was only one ladies match on tap for the evening, and local girl Sam Stosur fell to a hopefully resurgent Lucie Safarova, 64 64.

Kei In, Ivo Out.

Special Kei used his wildcard status in Stockholm to continue his solid rise through the rankings, taking out the number 8 seed Granollers, 26 64 62.  Go Kei!  Project 45 is still alive.

Other scores from Stockholm:
D Hrbaty (SVK) d P Andujar (ESP) 62 61
N Lapentti (ECU) d I Navarro (ESP) 36 76(5) 75

OOP for tomorrow is here.  Headbandian and Super Mario are in action.

Over in Vienna, the premier men's tourney of the week, JCF scored an upset by downing Dr. Ivo, 64 76(4).  I had a feeling JCF was going to take this one but not in straight sets.  A nice win for him.  Other than Ivo's ousting, the matches pretty much went to form, with Tabasco Ivanovic, Canas, FeLo, and Moya all victorious. 

OOP for tomorrow is here.  I'll have my eye on Gonzo/Bolleli, Ernests/Volandri, and Schwank/Simon.  I may also watch those matches.

Hey O!

Project 45 Loves Cup O Noodles.

The face of Asian tennis already has a three-year deal with Sony.  Now Special Kei has signed an endorsement deal with Nissin Food Products, the maker of Cup o' Noodles, the sustenance of choice for college kids around the world. 

From Tennis Week:

The 18-year-old Japanese has signed an endorsement and patch contract with Nissin Food Product Co. Nishikori will wear the "Cup Noodles" logo on his adidas shirt starting today at the AIG Open at the Ariake Coliseum in Tokyo, Japan. Nissin manufacturers the popular Ramen instant noodle mix.

Financial terms of the deal were not disclosed.

"I am glad to announce that I have signed a contract with Nissin Food Products Co., Ltd., Japan’s most famous food manufacturer," Nishikori said in a statement. "I have loved Ramen since I was a little boy. Even now that my life is based out of the United States I continue to spend a lot of time traveling around the world and often enjoy Nissin Noodles. Instant noodles is a food culture that Nissin Food Product Co., Ltd. has spread all over the world and always reminds me of Japan.  Diet is a very important aspect of my life as a professional athlete and will be a key factor to my success as a tennis player. Through my relationship with Nissin Food Product Co., Ltd., I will be able to receive great nutritional advice and strong support regarding my diet."

As my college roommate would always say as she rested her notebook on top of the steaming hot styrofoam cup (you know, to create a tight seal for the lid as it steeps for the required three minutes), "It's brain food.  And now I have more beer money."  I argue the former point. Can't argue with the latter.

Though I will say this.  If I ate a hot cup of Cup o' Noodles before hitting the court, I'd be throwing up noodles, peas, and corn almost immediately.  That stuff is NOT good for you.

Project 45 did his new sponsor proud by winning his first round match at the AIG Open, beating Robert Kendrick in three sets.  Go get em, Kei!