Forty Deuce

Pic This: LaMonftage

Another day, another Gael montage.  He won.

Get Off Your Knees, Gael. Inappropriate.

TMF dispatched LaMonf pretty handily, though the Pastry had his chances to take the first set.  Who knows what would have happened if he had taken it.  But congrats to Roger.  Apparently ALL OF PARIS  wants him to win.

Q. It looks as if Gaël Monfils had some very warm words for you at the end of the match. Do you get the sense a lot of people are pulling for you this week, that they'd love to see you finally do it on Sunday?

ROGER FEDERER: Yeah, I mean, I feel it since a few years now, to be honest with you. But this year even more extreme. When I walk on the streets or drive in the transportation or I go for dinner, everybody is like, This is your year. You've got todo it.

They're screaming from their scooters and out of the car. They even get out at the red lights and want me to sign an autograph or take a picture. It's quite incredible this last couple of weeks.

I'm torn.  On some level I want Roger to take it so that EVERYONE CAN STOP TALKING ABOUT IT.  But something tells me even if he takes it EVERYONE WILL KEEP TALKING ABOUT IT.

Apologies for the all capping.  I'm having difficulty controlling THE VOLUME OF MY VOICE.

Gael Monfils: The JJ of the ATP

 

Going through the pictures from yesterday it finally dawned on me as to why I have a love hate relationship with LaMonf.  He's the JJ of the ATP.  Or at least the JJ of old.

There's always drama in his matches, he runs down everything, he frustrates his opponents to no end, he calls the trainer all the time, and even if you don't watch his matches you can tell crazy shit happened just by looking at the pics.

He's so entertaining to watch but at the same time I find myself rolling my eyes a lot of the time, what with all the histrionics.

Kid does things on court that are just mindboggling.  But in-between those amazing points are points of idiocy or unnecessary drama, faux heavy breathing, etc.  I'm conflicted between being totally entertained and kinda wishing he'd just cool it and just play.  Not unlike how I feel about JJ at times.

And he's a drama queen.  Obvs. 

Someone find me some glitter!

Oh, and in case you missed it, disgustingly awesome:

Pic This: Ultimate Miscellany (ATP Edition)

Not that creepy out of context, maybe, but imagine Maximo Gonzalez sitting just like this, unblinking, for an entire changeover.  Because that's what he did.

Britain's Got Talent.

Love.  The Bullring just looks like the coolest place to camp out for a day.

Is there any better combination in tennis than good sports photographers and Gael Monfils?  92%.

Where there is a 92%, there must be an 8%.  In this case... Igor's hair, lending itself to general dorkitude.

Tennis as Art: The Scream

Heh.  Mutt and Jeff.

Sadness.  Still cute, though.

Freaky.

Pic This: And By Rabbit I Mean Rochus.

Yucky day.  Wet and windy conditions for all.  Not that it really had any impact on play.  Overall, kind of a boring day on the courts.


Hold up.  He ain't done yet, folks.  Let's see if he can pull a rabbit out of his hat tomorrow.


Snot Rocket and furry friends scampered away with a win.  Thank God.  I was getting worried.


I am digging the yellow that Nike's rocking for the boys.  So fresh and so clean.


Fed is balletic, Rafa is powerful, but for my money, Nole has the best action shots in the biz.  And if I haven't said it yet, mucho kudos to Adidas on their choice of blue for the clay court season.  It looks fantastic against the red clay.


Oh, Gypsy.  I want so badly to hate you, especially when you bounce Dani "Just Give Her A Damn Chocolate Tart" Hantuchova. But then you smile that dorky but sweet smile and not even my hater heart can...well...hate.


I'm gonna go out on a limb and say those are some British fans. 

I don't know what gave it away...


Dear Cone.  Please win tomorrow.  I miss your "Sacrebleu!" game faces.


I could stare at those long gangly Elf arms all. day. long.


One word.  700,000 syllables. 

Comfortability.


I'm not sure beating Blah on clay is worth "shitting the pants" but ok.


Jo Belly!


Phillipe Chatrier is officially christened.

Bring on Round 2!

1-1

That's Serena's new record against Klara Zakopalova for the '09 clay court season.  So... there's that.  I can't really say anything about anyone's level of play since I didn't watch very much of it, but I can say that Serena's knee wrap looked oddly high tech.  Although I could be making that up in my head.

I don't think she's even wearing jewelry from her own line. What kind of marketing strategy is that, Serena?  

There were other matches this morning, of course, mostly wrapped around a two hour rain delay...

Jelena's new not-entirely-horrible, but not-entirely-awesome Anta dress made its debut today. That's also a pretty good summary of how she played against Petra Cetkovska-- it's kind of like her game is currently on a factory reset: the big problem is gone, but none of the old programming has been reinstalled yet. Competent, and certainly enough to get her through the first two or three rounds, but not entirely solid yet. Meanwhile, look who's wearing pink!

Man. If, in some alternate universe, it ended up being a Dinara/Sveta final, Sveta would immediately have the upper hand because Dinara would be so. Jealous. Sveta played a really solid match against Claire Feuerstein, a French journeywoman who turned out to be much better than anyone thought she'd be-- possibly including Feuerstein herself.

'Round the ATP side, Nicolas Lapentti did his part to get Philippe Chartrier back on schedule by retiring down 4-6, 1-3 to Nole.  

  

Lapentti rolled his ankle-- which was already heavily taped-- towards the end of the first set, and obviously never got comfortable again. Nole looked calm and collected, had some silly misses, but mostly looked in perfectly good shape for the beginning of the tournament. 

Other results thus far: Monfils, Kohlscreiber, JMDP, Gicquel, Seppi and Disco Tommy all through easily in straight sets. Juan Monaco just knocked out Marcos-- Marcos, we hardly knew ye.  Caro, unsurprisingly, took the third set against Vera D fairly easily (6-1). The Gypsy prolonged Dani's misery by beating her in straight sets, Ruano Pascal did the same to Nikki V. Aleks Wozniak went through in 3, U-Rad went out in 3. Lena D through in straights, but went down a couple of breaks in the first. Sania's out and Dokic is through (only her second win since the AO?!). Quality guy Ivan Ljubicic is in a deciding set with Ferrero and Jo Willy and Apricot Bars are locked down in battle on Chartrier, but ESPN2 has decided I'd rather watch Blah. They are incorrect. Thank god for livestreaming. One note: conditions today have been terrible-- hours of rain delays this morning, terrible wind ever since. It looks like hell out there.

Pic This: Claymates

Pics from around Roland Garros. 

Given the gross grip on that Prince racquet, I think we all know who that is.


What's up with the blue and yellow, Adidas?  Are those going to be the summer colors? 
Also?  Shorts and Ana just do not get along. 


Who the hell is Flashman?



Game faces.


All of a sudden I'm craving beef jerky.  Mmmm....


And chicken wings.  Shit, I really need to get out of bed and eat lunch.


Please tell me she's wearing go go boots too.


Is it just me or is A-Rod wearing a shirt that almost kinda fits him?


Hey Muzz!  Get to the semis and then lose to Rafa 60 60 60 in 48 minutes, k? 
That's the gameplan.  Break!


Dude!  Stop it!


Roger's planning a Surfin' Safari, apparently.
 

Does that tape on her shoulder *really* do anything? 
All it seems to do is scream "HEY LOOK!!! I HAVE A BAD SHOULDER!!!"


Ah.  The backwards cap of dorkitude makes a triumphant appearance.


Gilles x 2.  I know this is super random, but I have always found G Mulls to be kinda cute.


The BunBand is back, folks.  Dina means business. 
And she's practicing more "Ecstasy on Clay" moves.


You're hot.  We know.  Stop it.  Or don't.  I don't know.


Only Jo's smile could distract me from the dead raccoon on his head.


Run, cameraman.  Run.  It's like fuckin' Cloverfield.

Pic This: Who Put a 6-Year-Old in Charge of the Doubles Draw?

Gael and Stan put in an appearance at EuroDisney to play an exhibition match.  From the look on Stan's face, I'm not sure this is what they were expecting.

Drama Queens

Yeah.  Cuz that's *totally* good for your knee, asshole.

News from around RG:

Full Serbian contingent
2008 winner Ana Ivanovic had her first practice on Thursday on court No1, while fellow Serbian Grand Slam winner Novak Djokovic was out on Philippe Chatrier court late in the afternoon. Scotland's Andy Murray, who recently overtook Djokovic in the rankings to rise to No3 in the world, had a hit-out away from the cameras on court No4, while French veteran Fabrice Santoro practised twice – on centre court in the morning and No1 in the afternoon. This is the 20th French Open for "The Magician" and also his last, as he prepares for retirement. King of Clay Rafael Nadal has still yet to be sighted in Paris, however…

Monfils still uncertain
Gaël Monfils is still hopeful of overcoming the inflamed patella tendons which have kept him off court for the entire European clay season. He came through a light training session on Thursday afternoon on Suzanne Lenglen court accompanied by his coach, Roger Rasheed. The world No11 was moving around very gingerly however, and has yet to decide whether he will be able to defend the points he won here last year when reaching the semi-final. He has asked the tournament organisers for the latest possible start – next Tuesday, therefore – to give himself every chance of being able to play.

It must be trippy to walk back onto an empty Chatrier for the first time since, oh, I don't know...
ALL YOUR DREAMS CAME TRUE.


So what do you guys thing about Muzz for RG 09?  He's my big question mark.  He could crash out in the second round or make the finals.  Neither result would shock me.

Players Who Suck Take The Practice Court

How dare you show your face around these parts?  Loser.


I would kill for those legs.


I had to do a double take to recognize who this was. 


Gael is questionable for RG. He said he's hoping for a miracle in the next 6 days.  Then again he's such a drama queen, though, considering he's French, isn't saying much.


Aww...Americans on clay.  They try so hard but it still doesn't look right.


Pretty.


Anyone know what his shirt says? 

(Pics from RG website)

Irrelevant

Did no one bother to notice that the dude is on one leg right now and barely played at all during the clay season?  So, to answer your question, Tennis Magazine: NO.

This is what cracks me up about Tennis Magazine.  With storylines morphing on a daily and weekly basis, how can a monthly tennis magazine really stay relevant?  Their Grand Slam preview issues are pure crap because by the time they come out, half of the stuff they write about on the players is wrong.  They tap players who are slumping and they ignore players who are on a tear.  Meanwhile, during non Slam season, their cover stories come out of nowhere.  Who was on the cover of their March 2009 issue?  JJ, with the headline "Jelena Jankovic Tries To Make A Major Move."  I mean, yeah, she is, but how is that at all timely or relevant at that moment? 

I mean, maybe they've realized that they can't compete with the internet and tennis blogs in terms of disseminating news.  Obviously that's entirely true.  There's no reason to print scores or anything.  But even if that's the case, if you don't focus on the storylines of the moment how do you stay relevant to true diehard tennis fans?

Besides, the advantage that journalists have over us wee bloggers is that you have access.  You can talk to the players, agents, coaches, etc.  Bloggers can't really interact or get inside information unless that information is already out there.  So use that to create content that is above and beyond what those of us who can only sit and scroll through our RSS readers can regurgitate. 

The last thought I have is that Tennis Magazine has virtually given up covering professional tennis in any meaningful way and instead focuses on being a "player's magazine".  Half of each issue is dedicated to instruction, gear reviews, tennis rule interpretation, sports psychology, etc.  If that's the case that's fine.  But I don't see why can't do both and it doesn't excuse the tour coverage being flat out wrong/irrelevant.

For my money, Inside Tennis is FAR superior.  And they're able to be a monthly magazine that stays relevant and tells me shit that I don't already know.  Sure, it's not as glossy and pretty as Tennis, but the content is night and day.

All I know is that for some reason I always get excited when I see Tennis Magazine in my mailbox.  But 2 minutes later, after I've flipped through it faster than US Weekly, I wonder why I bother. 

Beaten, Broken, and Battered. But Tres Adorable.

Once again, my five years of German help me in no way whatsoever. Thanks to greenshopper for posting these over at TW. The Four Musketeers are pretty much the *only* think from France that I don't actively hate.

But Who Else Will Fly The Crazy Flag?

The RG 08 semifinalist got an MRI on his knee and the results were "not good." He's out for at least a month and he'll go back to reevaluated in a couple of weeks.  The results obviously make his return to RG questionable and his ability to defend his SF points doubtful.  Too bad, I suppose.  There is no one that I find more simultaneously exciting and infuriating to watch.

Well that's not true.  There's always this guy:

But the difference is that when I watch LaMonf play he infuriates me to the point of wanting to punch him in the face.  When I watch Marat I get infuriated and worked up in a...different way.  So yeah.

No, I Am Not Entertained, Actually.

I blame the werewolf look.  What, is he auditioning for a role in New Moon?

Gilly and the Frenchies had a tough day at the office.  And we're not talking Jo and Reeshie, two players whose games may not suit clay.  We're talking the dirtball dogs, Gilles and Gael.  Gilles lost to Andreas Beck 75 61 (6-1? On clay?), and Gael was absolutely trounced by Janko, 63 61 (Really Gael? [Insert disapproving look here]).

So the other seed is out of Fed's quarter.  No wonder the dude looks so damn relaxed.

The Marat Is Intent On Making This Retirement Tour Reflect His Entire Career

As for the boys the match of the day was Monfils/Marat. 

I'm not really sure *how* Marat blew a 5-2 lead in the third set, but he did.  I'm not convinced La Monf even knows how he did it.  After being down and out and down two breaks, the match somehow landed in his lap. 

I blame the Magic Cap of Dorkitude.  Also, memo to Adidas: Maratski hasn't retired yet.  You might want to get him the new blue kit ASAP.  Russian Smurf needs to make an appearance immediately.

In other news, Wolverine, aka, the man who cannot be killed, somehow ropped the first set to Old Man Rainer 63, only to revive himself and issue double breadsticks the next two sets.  He lives to fight another day.  Also, nice wins for Big Byrd over Blah (and for serious, Blah could not have been more Blah (or is it Blahier?) in that boring as match), and Taylor Dent continued his comeback efforts with a win over a tough but probably still injured Disco.

[2] R Federer (SUI) d [28] N Kiefer (GER) 64 61
[3] N Djokovic (SRB) d [31] P Mathieu (FRA) 64 61
[5] A Roddick (USA) d [25] D Tursunov (RUS) 76(9) 62
[7] G Simon (FRA) d [29] R Schuettler (GER) 36 61 61
[9] G Monfils (FRA) d [22] M Safin (RUS) 57 75 76(3) - saved 2 M.P.
[10] J Tsonga (FRA) d [Q] R Kendrick (USA) 75 64
[21] T Berdych (CZE) d [13] J Blake (USA) 64 67(3) 63
[Q] T Dent (USA) d [15] T Robredo (ESP) 75 63

More From Around The Grounds

Here's the thing.  If you were to ask me what my favorite matches were this past week it would actually take some time to even recall what matches I attended.  For me, the tournaments aren't really about the tennis that's played in stadium court (though, the Simon/Lu and Rafa/Nalby matches were rad).  I can and do watch tennis matches all the time.  The real action is around the practice courts and near the player areas. 

A rare smile from Nalby on the practice courts.

Old Man Fed holding his back.  THAT must be why he lost to Murray.

Shirtless Viktor.

Sam and his Querrey Hand under the watchful eye of Jose Higueras.

The only thing we liked about Vika: Her shoes.

Flavia Stink Eye is the best.

LaMonf playing some footie.

Sveta on her way to practice.  She stuck around for a few days after she lost.  Good.  She needed the work.  Unfortunately her practices were not great.

Aww...puppy.

Creepy tennis paparazzi.  I think this is after Ana apologized to Victoria for not being able to stop for an autograph. "No, sorry."  Adorbs.

For *this* you don't put a towel over your face?  

(Pics for Forty Deuce by Love All and C Note)

Pic This: Coach Gael Keeps It Light

"A Musketeer loves women, and he loves them by taking them in his arms."

How could I forget about Team France?  They're preparing for their tie against the Czech Republic.  If it weren't for Serbia/Spain, this would be the tie of the weekend.  Because who knows what you're gonna get?  Which Big Byrd will show up?  Which Radek?  Can Jo and Gilles carry the French?  Will Reeshie and Gael have to step in?  Who knows?
What I do know is that I'd rather look at the Frenchies than the Czechies. 


So yeah, I'm gonna soak this in...

 





 

"Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Cold."

First Gonzo at AO, now Jo.  It seems Rafa's going all Kill Bill on the ATP, taking hard court revenge left and right.  Rafa gutted out a tough three set win over Jo, 64 67(5) 64, to reach the semis in Rotterdam.  Next up, La Monf and a chance to avenge his loss in Doha earlier this year.

Perhaps avenging his loss to Muzz at the USO is on the agenda too?  You might want to put some padding around your heart area, Muzz.  Rafa's a comin'.

The other semi sees Better Than Average Mario against Muzz, who has quietly made his way through this tournament.  For some reason he was tested today by Gicquel, eventually winning due to the a left groin injury sustained by Gicquel in the third.  This was tough one that really could have gone against Andy, but he found his way through, winning 76(2) 46 30.

OOP for Saturday:
1.  Mario vs. Muzz (2:00pm)
2.  Rafa vs. La Monf (7:30pm)

What Is This, Florida?

Three players were forced to retire mid-match today due to injury.  Ironically, none of them were related to cramping or the heat.  Zheng Jie was trailing 4-1 to Sveta when she fell on her already injured left wrist.  Considering she's icing it before she's even walked off the court, I suspect it might be a break of some sort.

The scariest retirement came from Vika Azarenka, who authoritatively took the first set from Serena, 63 and was down a break in the second set when you could see she started to physically labor.  It almost looked like she was hyperventilating between points.  At the changover she called for the trainer and looked like she was going to blow chunks at any minute.  After disappearing into the lockerroom to get treatment, Vika came back out and clearly looked wiped.  Watching her attempt to carry on, while fighting to just stay upright, was just scary and sad.  ESPN speculates that it's virus related and Lena D apparently confirmed that Vika did bring a virus into the tourney.  There are other reports that it was food poisoning.

Hope the kid gets better.  I know she'll recover physically.  But a retirement while a set up on Serena for a spot in the quarterfinals is going to haunt her for bit. 

The weirdest retirement goes to Monfils against Gilles.  It was two sets to one when LaMonf called it quits, citing a right wrist injury.  This wouldn't be odd except that (1) he has history of retiring mid-match, (2) it's a Grand Slam and you play through pain, and (3) after the match he said at first he thought the injury was in his head.

I don't know.  Seeing as how you have on girl who retired because she may have broken her wrist, and another who was trying to play while trying to stay upright and conscious, this seemed kinda weak.

Pic This: Gilles Gives Gael The Brush Off