Forty Deuce

Pic This: Muggy

Day 3 is in the books and the first rounds on both sides are complete.  

Hike up your socks, folks, it's just getting interesting.

Surrealism.

Still the best hair in tennis.

The WAGs are out in full force.

Happy and no headlights.  Win.

Pic This: In Like A Lamb...

Day 1 is on its way into the books. 

And except for a few moments of stress, it was pretty snoozy.

 

Fed won easily, though Devon Britton, the young American, showed some stuff to be excited about.

 

Makiri won easily in her new Adidas Competition gear. 

Hmm...maybe it *was* the clothes.

 

Don't tell Aga, but that ain't a checkmark on her kit.

Chakka Fierce

I don't know why.  But I laughed.  Out loud.

She looks great though.

Chak-er

 

Well you go on with your bad self, girl.

The Yale Open kicked off yesterday with a mild upset, as Chakky took out #4 seed Nads, coming back from a bagel in the first to take the next two sets 76 64.

As for today, A-Rad was under serious threat from Roberta Vinci but came away with a three set win, 76(5) in the third.

Today's OOP:

Stadium (from 10.00hrs)
1. Agnieszka Radwanska vs. Roberta Vinci
2. ATP: Nielsen vs. Kendrick
3. ATP: Gil vs. Baghdatis (NB 13.00hrs)
4. Ai Sugiyama vs. Amélie Mauresmo
5. Svetlana Kuznetsova vs. Zheng Jie (NB 19.00hrs)
6. ATP: Gicquel vs. Querrey

Grandstand (from 10.00hrs)
1. ATP: Kim vs. Gabashvili
2. Francesca Schiavone vs. Magdalena Rybarikova
3. Patty Schnyder vs. Virginie Razzano
4. ATP: Lapentti vs. Ram
5. Garbin/Medina Garrigues vs. Bondarenko/Bondarenko

Court 1 (from 10.00hrs)
1. Elena Vesnina vs. Gisela Dulko
2. ATP: Phau vs. Becker
3. ATP: Lu vs. García-López
4. Yanina Wickmayer vs. Alisa Kleybanova (NB 15.00hrs)
5. Dekmeijere/U.Radwanska vs. Chuang/Yan

Court 2 (from 10.00hrs)
1. ATP: Bolelli vs. Rochus
2. Ekaterina Makarova vs. Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova
3. Iveta Benesova vs. Varvara Lepchenko
4. ATP: Parrott/Polasek vs. Chardy/Santoro
5. ATP: Fyrstenberg/Matkowski vs. Kas/Petzschner

Court 3 (from 10.00hrs)
1. ATP: Zverev vs. Starace
2. ATP: Golubev vs. Cuevas
3. ATP: González vs. Acasuso
4. Borwell/Kops-Jones vs. Niculescu/Olaru

Sniper! Sniper!!!

The seeds went atumbling today.  #2, 3, and 4 are out of Eastbourne. 

I'm not entirely sure how a struggling Chakky beats a well-rested JJ on grass in the first round.  But it happened.  And it was a head scratcher.  JJ blamed the change in surface and lack of motivation:

"It took me a while to get the rhythm out there.  And then for some reason from staying so low and getting those low balls my legs got so tight and so tired, and especially in the third set I didn't have the energy in my legs anymore to bend down."

"It was obviously my first match on grass. I'll play Wimbledon and then we'll see. At least I can take a few weeks off then. I wish I could take a break now. I need to get to where I want to play tennis again."

Yikes.

Another head scratcher?  Not that Kuz lost to CanWoz, but that she got bageled in the first set and only took three games off of her.  But we'll cut The Kuz some slack here.  She's not a robot:

"I played for two months on clay and I have it almost in my blood.  I don't have to think about the tactics. I know how to defend, how to attack and what time; how to serve and this and that. And on this surface, everything is opposite. For me, it's too much to change in three days."

The less shocking upset of the day was Momo over Bepa in three.  Nice to see that while Bepa has added much needed strapping to her ankles, she has not gone away from her Casper routine.  I'm just shocked her towel wasn't blue.  Then she'd be *completely* invisible, just like she likes it.

Also losing today? Domi, Sorana, and AKO.  You know who didn't lose?  Dina, who bageled and 3'd ALG.  And no I'm not surprised that it's been over 2 hours since that match ended and there is no story in my newsfeed abou this.

As for the boys, both the top two seeds are out of Eastbourne S'Hitogenbosch.  Fer, lover of grass, lost to Benjamin Becker and Tommy Boredo (I can call him that now that we're off clay) lost to MAR-COS BagDAHtis *clapclapclapclapclap*.

Over in Eastbourne, Igor (top seeded Igor?) followed his ladyfriend out of the tournament,  losing to Fancy Dancy.  Nice day for the Canucks.

Eastbourne Results

Women
Singles – First Round

Aleksandra Wozniak (CAN) d. (2/WC) Svetlana Kuznetsova (RUS) 60 63
Anna Chakvetadze (RUS) d. (3) Jelena Jankovic (SRB) 67(5) 63 62
Amélie Mauresmo (FRA) d. (4) Vera Zvonareva (RUS) 63 16 63
(6) Caroline Wozniacki (DEN) d. Alisa Kleybanova (RUS) 63 62
(8) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) d. (Q) Urszula Radwanska (POL) 61 61
Marion Bartoli (FRA) d. Gisela Dulko (ARG) 63 61
(Q) Vera Dushevina (RUS) d. Ai Sugiyama (JPN) 67(6) 75 64
(Q) Ekaterina Makarova (RUS) d. (Q) Jarmila Groth (SVK) 76(7) 61

Doubles – First Round
(4) Stosur/Stubbs (AUS/AUS) d. Chuang/Mirza (TPE/IND) 75 64
Mattek-Sands/Petrova (USA/RUS) d. Senoglu/Yan (TUR/CHN) 61 64
King/Zheng (USA/CHN) d. Kleybanova/Makarova (RUS/RUS) 76(7) 63

Men
Singles - Second Round
[4] F Santoro (FRA) d R Ginepri (USA) 46 64 61
[8] G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) d Y Lu (TPE) 64 67(0) 76(3)
I Ljubicic (CRO) d [WC] J Goodall (GBR) 63 75
J Tipsarevic (SRB) d [Q] B Klein (AUS) 76(5) 61

Singles - First Round
[Q] F Dancevic (CAN) d [1] I Andreev (RUS) 76(6) 62
J Benneteau (FRA) d [5] M Youzhny (RUS) 46 64 64

Doubles - First Round
M Fyrstenberg (POL) / M Matkowski (POL) d [1] L Dlouhy (CZE) / L Paes (IND) 61 76(3)
L Arnold Ker (ARG) / M Kohlmann (GER) d A Seppi (ITA) / L Zovko (CRO) 64 36 10-6
[WC] C Fleming (GBR) / K Skupski (GBR) d M Melo (BRA) / A Sa (BRA) 64 46 10-8
J Coetzee (RSA) / J Kerr (AUS) d J Benneteau (FRA) / F Santoro (FRA) 62 61
[3] B Soares (BRA) / K Ullyett (ZIM) vs [WC] J Erlich (ISR) / J Murray (GBR) 46 76(6) - to finish Wednesday

S'Hitogenbosch Results

Women:
Singles - Second Round
(3) Flavia Pennetta (ITA) d. (Q) Ksenia Pervak (RUS) 61 61
(WC) Yanina Wickmayer (BEL) d. (4) Sorana Cirstea (ROU) 64 63
Tamarine Tanasugarn (THA) d. (7) Iveta Benesova (CZE) 63 61
Kristina Barrois (GER) d. (WC) Michaella Krajicek (NED) 64 63

Singles - First Round

(1) Dinara Safina (RUS) d. Anna-Lena Groenefeld (GER) 60 63
Nathalie Dechy (FRA) d. (2) Dominika Cibulkova (SVK) 63 36 63
Alona Bondarenko (UKR) d. Stéphanie Foretz (FRA) 64 67(1) 63

Doubles - First Round
Lefèvre/Védy (FRA/FRA) d. (WC) Flipkens/Kerkhove (BEL/NED) 62 64

Men:
Singles - Second Round
[Q] B Becker (GER) d [1] F Verdasco (ESP) 75 76(4)
D Sela (ISR) d [5] I Kunitsyn (RUS) 64 63
I Navarro (ESP) d [6] M Gicquel (FRA) 64 36 75
M Llodra (FRA)d [Q] K Vliegen (BEL) vs 62 63

Singles - First Round
M Baghdatis (CYP) d [2] T Robredo (ESP) 75 62
[Q] T de Bakker (NED) d B Phau (GER) 76(3) 26 63

Doubles - First Round
[1] W Moodie (RSA) / D Norman (BEL) d [WC] T de Bakker (NED) / J Huta Galung (NED) 64 76(5)
[WC] R Sluiter (NED) / P Wessels (NED) d [2] F Cermak (CZE) / M Mertinak (SVK) 76(3) 67(4) 10-4
[3] C Kas (GER) / P Petzschner (GER) d O Hernandez (ESP) / F Verdasco (ESP) 67(2) 63 10-8
J Brunstrom (SWE) / J Rojer (AHO) d D Vemic (SRB) / M Zverev (GER) 76(8) 62
O Marach (AUT) / D Skoch (CZE) d P Andujar (ESP) / D Ferrer (ESP) 62 63
A Clement (FRA) / M Gicquel (FRA) d R Wassen (NED) / I Zelenay (SVK) 64 62

Even The Gays Hate Viko. That's All I Needed To Know.

The ingenues pose for French FHM (I think).

Somone was acting a diva and someone got jizz in her hair.  Just sayin. 

Do NOT fuck with the 'Mo's.


For a midget she definitely works what she's got.


Chakky!  Well done with your ridix long hair.  I think it kind of steals the show.


Ah, A-Bond.  Sluttin' it  up as per yoosh.

Blink And You'll Miss Them

They came, they saw, they said "Nah...I'm over this."

Too bad.  Makiri's white and purple Stella number looks, as always, rad.  And what's up with Chakky's overheatedness?  Did the pink skirt bring out the color in her face?

Love ya, Bethanie.  But is that skirt made of basketball short material?  Just checking.

Oh, Flavs.  Sadness.  More sad?  The fact that Sergio Tachnini NEVER gives you anything fun or cool to wear.  Would it kill them to migrate away from the navy blue pallette?

Pic This: Rome If You Want To

It's just so damn poetic.  You can't make this shit up.

  
So.  Close.


What the what was going on Vika's quarterfinal match? 
All I have are pictures of her with her ass on the clay. Not that I'm complaining.

 
Does anyone really know where JJ's game currently ranks relative to the other ladies? 
I'm finding it really hard to handicap her chances at RG. 

Also?  With as much hairspray as you use on that ponytail,
I really don't think you should be noshing on it, honey.


LOLZ.

Get a sponsor, Agi.


Come on, ladies.  Get it together for RG.  Stop being retarded in third sets.


The Cone won!  And then she lost.


Not sure I'll ever get sick of Dina's "Ecstasy on Clay" modern art piece.

 
So.  Close.

Fed Cup Foto Fun

Sigh.  I'm really sad that I was too drunk and hungover to enjoy this round of Fed Cup in any meaningful way.  I guess I'll just have to piece it all together CSI style:

  
I love how JJ gets away with this shit.  Classic.


"Pop the corks, boys.  Mama's thirsty!"


Sigh.  Oh, Chakky.


"It's the one that says 'BADASS MUTHAFUCKA', motherfucker!"

 
"Drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry."


Heeeeeeeeere's Kimmy!

(Also, I'm pretty sure there's a gyno joke I could make but seriously,
I'm not firing on all cylinders quite yet.)

 
Rad!


"Will you give all you can give
So that our banner may advance
Some will fall and some will live
Will you stand up and take your chance?
The blood of the martyrs
Will water the meadows of France!"


It takes a pretty dress and a million dollar smile, too.


Huh?  What's Bepa doing here?


All that's missing is a can of Fosters.


Liezel rocks her O face.


Heh.  Heh heh.  The world is changing, indeed.
 

Acne, cold sores, and manhands.  I don't think you're ready for this jelly, World Group.

I Don't Know, Russia. I'm Not Feeling It.

Italy's got their game faces on. 

And never underestimate what Tranny can do during Fed Cup.  Or Flavs for that matter. 

As for the Russians, they come in a bit battered and shell-shocked:

Into the second singles berth steps the 22nd- ranked Anna Chakvetadze who has registered only four wins to her name this year, four less than Nadia Petrova who can count herself unlucky to be watching from the bench.

Winners of 15 of their last 16 ties, Russia will look to Svetlana Kuznetsova to provide a backbone for success. Kuznetsova is now coachless after her split last month from Olga Morozova but is enjoying a Fed Cup run of eight straight singles wins. She admits though that preparations this week have not been perfect: “We have not managed to practise indoors, only outdoors, and not as much as we should have because of the conditions but we are looking forward to the weekend.”

Chakky only has 4 wins this year?  Ugh.

Saturday
Flavia Pennetta (ITA) v Anna Chakvetadze (RUS)
Francesca Schiavone (ITA) v Svetlana Kuznetsova (RUS)

Sunday
Flavia Pennetta (ITA) v Svetlana Kuznetsova (RUS)
Francesca Schiavone (ITA) v Anna Chakvetadze (RUS)
Sara Errani /Roberta Vinci (ITA) v Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova/Nadia Petrova (RUS)

Draw day interviews with Chakky, Sveta, Flavs, Tranny, and Nads and Chevy.

Pic This: If I Could Reach Through My Computer And Hug You And Not Be Creepy, I Would.

Fuck you, Viko.

Sigh....Wasted Chance To Stinkeye Blah

Is stinkeye a verb? Whatevs. We totally wanted to go and just ask for Anna's autograph. Bepa also had an autograph session. Too bad neither of us had a copy of Kofi Annan's biography for her to sign.

Pic This: "She Had Them Applebottom Jeans, The Boots With The Ferrrr."

"Shorty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low."

Pic This: What's Gotten Into Chakky?

It's...weird.

Even Shamil's caught it.

Someone Give The Girl A Hug

Good on ya, Snot Rocket.  She hung in there and held her nerve to oust Chakky in three sets, 64 67 63.  She'll face Ski Boots next, where, sorry kid, I hope her fairytale run ends.

I was pretty surprised with how in depth and frank Mary Carillo and Pam Shriver were with her backstory.  Obviously we all know about her dad and her depression, but they were even talking about the physical abuse she suffered at his hands.  The frank talk obviously made the win all that more poignant.

As for Chakky, she just fell apart midway through the match.  She was totally in the match at all times but you could see that she didn't believe.  She could have won it but after losing the first set she left the court and when she came back she clearly looked like she had been crying.  And throughout the second set she looked like she was about to burst into tears between every point. 

Headlights Are For Cars

Flashes of brilliance in a sea of poo.  That's the only way to describe the 2+ hour match between Dani and Fosters Dellaqua.  It was a battle of nerves as both ladies were broken over and over again.  Fosters had every right to win this match, but she just couldn't shut the door on Dani.  The key was the first set tiebreak, which Dani eventually won 13-11.  She would go on to win the match 76(11) 64.

On the fashion front, I love the blue on Dani.  Also love that she's left her ponytail loose instead of that uptight braid she was rocking last year (it made her look like an insane control freak for some reason).  But please, Dani, invest in some Low Beams.  It's so damn awkward watching you play sometimes.

Nice win for Chakky over AKO, but my heart goes out to Anne.  Tough draw for her.  She played well in Auckland and deserved to make it to the second round here.  But she showed a lot of heart coming back from a set down.  Unfortunately, in today's heat, she just ran out of gas. 

One thing that stood out to me watching today's matches was the gulf in fitness levels between the top players and the second tier players.  It's mindboggling to me to see players completely tank in second and third sets because their fitness prevents them from dealing with the conditions.  I totally agree with Brad Gilbert (reluctantly) that it's inexcusable.  This is the first Slam of the year and you've had two months to get into proper shape. 

And yes, Strawberry-Lemonade Nads is still in the mix.  There's just so much unnecessary color going on in that shot.

Pic This: Hey Ladies!

  

 



 

There Must Be Some Toros In The Atmosphere

The JB Group Classic exhibition in Hong Kong officially got underway today, and Team Russia fired the first shot.  Bepa beat Zheng 76(3) 64 and Chakky beat Sania 64 64.  Bepa's match was appanrently a break-a-thon, with 13 breaks of service.

In the doubles match, Team Europe beat Team America 64 75.

I think it's hilarious that JJ makes the Burrito look like a midget.  On, and JJ?  Just because you leave the stencil off doesn't mean we don't know it's still a Prince.  Nice to see her back in the shorts though.  She's one of the few that can pull off the on-court shorts look.

World War III. Of Course JJ's Involved.

Uh...where's Venus?

The JB Group Classic exhibition is set to officially kick off on Wednesday with Team Russia vs. Team Asia/Pacific and Team Americas vs. Team Europe.

But before the official start of the exo, the "Stars of Tomorrow" (no pressure) played two exhibition matches.  Coco Vandeweghe beat the Burrito in three sets, 36 63 64, and Zhang Lin beat Alexandra Panova, 57 63 10-8.  Nice win for CoCo.

More pics from the players' gathering:

Note to JJ.  Never EVER turn your back on Chakky.  She will cut you.  And then seduce the PI she hires to investigate your murder.


I kinda want to see a knife fight between these two. 

Zheng Jie is adorable.  I just want to pick her up and put her in my pocket.  I do not want to do the same with JJ.  If I did put her in my pocket she would probably disintegrate into a handful of glitter.  And that shit is a pain to clean out of your pockets.

Future stars?  Pavlova looks like Nads' cuter kid sister.

Gobble Gobble, Time To Wobble

Well it's Thanksgiving here in the States, the day in which Americans gather around a roasted bird and pretend to forget that in exchange for the generous hospitality the indigenous peoples occupying this great land offered, white settlers gave them disease, war, subjugation, and casinos.  So you know, win-win!

Putting all that aside, it is the day where we gather around the table with people we may or may not like and give thanks for the blessings bestowed upon us.  This year I'm spending it in NYC with my sister and it looks like I'll be attending a very Felicityesque T-Day with a bunch of NYC transplants.  I'm genuinely looking forward to it.  Well, the mulled wine at the very least.

All this is a roundabout introduction to my list of the 10 Tennis Related Things I'm Thankful For:

10.  JJ -- Shocker, right?  But seriously, I'm thankful for JJ.  She keeps it fun and interesting.  After all, who else would we talk about if she wasn't around?  The girl gives good quote, hilarious picture, and non-stop glitter-infused drama.  To that, I raise my glass of Aqua Viva water.

9.  My Wilson KFactor kTour Racquet -- Sigh.  It was love at first strike with this puppy, which I got about 8 months ago.  I resisted it for so long because it was Lindsay and Justine's racquet of choice, two players I didn't like that much.  But I demoed Masha's Prince 03 White, Ana's Yonex RQiS 1, Nole's Wilson kBlade, and even JJ's Prince Speedport White and couldn't find one I loved.  At my wits end I finally demoed the kTour, and it was absolutely perfect.  For anyone who's interested, try it out with Wilson Sensation strings at 57 lbs.  It's just a pure and clean hit.

8.  The First Half of 2008 -- It was fun while it lasted.  My girls (Masha/Ana) and boys (Rafa/Nole) were winning, they were looking good, and my life as a tennis fan was all rainbows and handbags.  And then we all stepped on the grass of Wimbledon and it all (well, almost all) went to shit. 

7.  Crazy Eyez Fed -- I love this guy.  He needs to come back, ASAP.

6.  Crazy Russians -- What is it about the home of Stalin, Rasputin, and Vodka that it keeps rolling out the crazies?  Hmmm...I think I may have answered my own question.  Between CrazySexLostHisCool and his  potty mouth of a baby sister, Casper The Melting Ghost, Underachieving Kuz, NoServe McGee, Angry A-Chak, and of course, their greatest export, Maria "Fuck The French" Pova, they really keep things interesting.

5.  New Pretty Faces -- Hot Crazy Elf Train, Gilly, Jo, and Ernie.  Not only are they new cute boys to fawn over, but they actually have game and are exciting to watch.  Sometimes God does give with both hands.

4.  Davis Cup -- Sure, maybe this is inflated given the events of the past week, but still.  Even if Spain hadn't won the Cup in the manner in which they did, Davis Cup was awesome this year.  And looking forward to next year it can only get better, what with TMF agreeing to grace us with his presence.  So for all the HoYay! awesomeness that Davis Cup brings on a quarterly basis, I bring thanks.  Now, if only the ladies took Fed Cup as seriously. 

3.  Rafa -- Sure, I love my Nole, but Rafa's ridiculous 2008 drew me back into men's tennis.  I love his fight, his competitive spirit, his strut, his ADD, his humility and grace, and his perfectly bulbous ass. 

2. Baby E -- Come on, this one's obvious, right?  She single-handedly brought me back into tennis, as it had been a long time since I had a WTA player that I genuinely rooted for.  She's a breath of fresh air in the diva world of the WTA.  And on this day of overeating let us never forget: She's a nerdy fat girl stuck in a hot body. 

1.  You guys -- I really didn't know what to expect when I started this blog in July.  It all came down to the fact that I had all these stupid and immature tennis thoughts running in my head all the time that it was distracting.  So I started the site just to get these ideas "on paper" so I could move on.  I never expected a an international coaltion of like-minded tennis fans, who love the sport and the players but don't put them on a pedestal, would come together to create the rad community that we have going here.  Seriously, you guys make me check my own site on a quarter of an hour basis to keep up with your hilarious comments and insights.  So on the serious, with no sense of cynicism or or irony intended, thanks.

Alrighty, off to get drunk now.  If you see a drunken Asian girl stumbling the streets of Spanish Harlem, steer clear.  I can't promise the turkey is staying down.

The Backwash of Victory

The Russian ladies (sans Bepa and Kuz, oddly) went back to the Motherland to receive their well-deserved props for a fantastic year of Russian tennis. 

Not sure what Lena was thinking here.  There's a lot going on there but I think I'll just focus on the white tights.  Just...why?

 
Lena is so frustrating because she's clearly gorgeous.  Why she goes out of her way to distract people from that fact is beyond me.  She's, like, movie star glam in that pic.

What can I say about Dina that hasn't already been said?  Adorable!

But on the serious, what was up with this weird series of Two Girls, One Cup?

 I think Chakky sums it all up here:

Luxembourg Loves Ladies, Too.

There shouldn't be too much mystery in Luxembourg, but then again, who knows given the recent form of some of these players.  The way the draw worked out, it looks like a pretty easy warm up tournament for Lena D, who will be looking to regain her sharpness for Doha.  Standing in her way to the finals: Momo and Dani.

Yeah, I wouldn't exactly be shaking in my Yonex boots either.

On the other half of the draw it's a complete crapshoot.  A-Chak and Ski Boots will be contesting that half, but again, given their recent form who knows?  I'd actually put my money on bracket buster and FOJJ (friend of JJ) Na Li to possibly get through this half.  Cuz it's kinda crap.

Nonetheless I will be tuning into this tournament to see the progress of two Forty Deuce baby faves: Sorana Cirstea and Laura Robson.  Cirstea  won her first title a few weeks ago in Tashkent and Robson was granted a wildcard for this tourney.  Hope they do well.

Robby, aka Baby Ana, will play her first round match against Iveta "My Torso is Unhumanly Long" Benesova.  Sorana, aka Baby Flavs, will play a qualifier.

Can I Have Chakky Narrate My Life?

She's got the greatest voice on tour.  It's so...indifferent.  Like she's constantly annoyed.  I love it.

Moscow Player Party Pics -- Who died?

What's with all the black, ladies?  And seriously, a little bronzer on the feet never hurt nobody.  Y'all need to try it.

(Pics from Tennis Forum and Mens Tennis Forum)

UPDATED: Nicole Vaidisova?!? Really?

Matt Cronin, has a nice article up over at Fox Sports on the possibility that JJ will finish the year as the World #1 having not won a slam.  I know, put the baseball bat down and back away from the dead horse.  The guy clearly is not a JJ fan.

But Cronin's article is great because he gets some choice quotage from Carlos Rodriguez, Justine Henin's coach.  Dude has got some opinions and he ain't shy to share em.

On Ana:

It's not like the Argentine doesn't like the potential of some of the kids — it's just that they are so wildly inconsistent. Take Roland Garros champion Ana Ivanovic, who is just 5-5 since winning her first Slam crown in Paris. Sven Groenefeld, whom Rodriguez considers the best coach on tour today, coaches the Serbian, but the 20-year-old is struggling mightily.

"I think Ana can do big things, but she needs more maturity," Rodriguez said. "It's very difficult for a player to learn what to do when she's in trouble. Ivanovic is not able to have a Plan B or C to solve the situations, and she loses complete control. The coach can help with this, but in the end, it's up to the player to find for herself what possibilities will work. The coach can only help you to a certain point."

On Chakky:

Rodriguez spent a little time this past summer working with former world No. 4 Anna Chakvetadze but couldn't make it work with the Russian, who has spiraled downward to No. 12. On the outside, Chakvetadze appears to have all the ingredients that Rodriguez would like: foot speed, soft hands, the ability to take the ball on the rise and smarts. But he couldn't get through to the 21-year-old.

"Anna seems like she wants to work, but I told her, at the end of the day, deep inside of you, you don't want to try to go further and to push yourself more to succeed," he said. "I cannot help you if you don't have the will to do something, even if I'm the best or worst coach in the world. She has the talent. But she's really confused as to what she needs to do to succeed to do to become a No. 1 or No. 2 player in the world. She's not ready to make the sacrifices it takes to go to the top, there's not question about it. A champion is one inside and outside the court, and when you take Anna outside the court, she's really a disaster."

So far so good.  Can't argue with him any thing here.  How long have Ana fans been complaining about her lack of a B game?  Crash the net, Baby E.  CRASH THE NET!

But then Carlos starts running his mouth and all of a sudden he starts losing credibility with me:

On JJ:

"That's the face of tennis today, with a player who is reaching No.1 without winning a Grand Slam," Henin's coach Carlos Rodriguez told FOXsports.com of Jankovic, who was 0-9 against Henin. "It's a sign. She's a good player, but when you see Maria Sharapova and the Williams sisters, they not only win Grand Slams, but they have the charisma. They give something extra, not only hitting balls. There's more behind them."

What are you smoking?  Uh, JJ lacks many things (a serve for example) but charisma is SO. NOT. ONE OF THEM.  The woman does the splits on court, smiles all the time, chats with the crowd, and wears BODY GLITTER for goodness sakes. 

And then, he inexplicably picks Nicole Vaidisova as the young player with the most potential:

"She's amazing," Rodriguez said. "It comes back to the entourage she has around her. It's so important. When you are talking mental, these girls are very strong, but when you are talking emotional, it's very hard. The emotional takes over the mental and she completely loses the way. It's a pity. I hope someone can take care of her because she's charismatic and is a really good player, but her emotional (state) and the intelligence is not that good."

I'm starting to get the feeling that Carlos doesn't know what "charismatic" means.

UPDATED:  Apparently I wasn't the only one who was perplexed by Carlos' use of "charismatic".  Matt Cronin posted this over at Tennis Forums:

From the author:

Allow me to weigh on a few things:

1: Carlos only responded to questions about the players I asked him about, hence the admission of Dementieva, Safina and Kim. I only had a certain amount of time and we also discussed coaching philosophy for a magazine piece I’m doing so I couldn’t fit those folks in.

2: What he essentially means by charisma is that “extra special something” that player takes on court, not charm, which JJ obviously has loads of. JJ still needs to prove that she’s a big time player and she knows that.

3: Chakvetadze publicly spoke about Carlos plenty during the summer, not it’s not out of hand for him to be discussing her. As much as I like her game and think she is smart, thoughtful person, she is struggling emotionally, hence her poor results.

4. I don’t agree with his comments about Maria, but he’s said much the same in the past about players who do a fair amount of modeling, photo shoots, etc.

5. He likes Ivanovic’s potential a lot, but said she’s needs to mature and I’m sure that AI would say much the same.

6. He does not want to coach Nicole and I was stunned as some of you that he thought that she still has such great potential and I told him so. He wants to coach juniors now, not pros.

7: He never said Justine was certain to come back.

7. He admits that he is a tough coach and says that only resilient players like Henin can put up with him.

Got to go but will be back on Tuesday if you want to discuss more...

Best

Matt

Anna Leaving Adidas?!?!

Chakvetadze, people.  Chakvetadze.  Why?  Which Anna did you think I was talking about?

Sports Business Journal is reporting that A-Chak is leaving Adidas and heading over to Fila.  So she's going from being the #2 Russian for Adidas (Dinara) to the #2 Russian for Fila (Kuz).  A nice signing for Fila, as they needed an "Ana" to Kuz's "Justine".  Let's face it, Kuz ain't exactly modeling any clothes out there.

Flashback: A Reminder of How Good Masha Was

In preparation for the Fed Cup final between Russia and Spain, which starts on Saturday, Tennis Channel is replaying 2008 Fed Cup matches this week.  I am very excited about this because the Russia/Israel tie from February was the most weird, hilarious, and fun tie to watch. 

They are scheduled to show the Sharapova vs Obziler tie at 1:30pm EST today (Tuesday).  This is the infamous "grunting match" where the Israeli crowd tried to get in Pova's head by grunting whenever she hit the ball.  Oh, Israel.  That's so cute.  Did you really think that was going to throw the Pova off?  She destroyed Tzipi 60 64. 

Masha (who looked awesome in her red and white Nike gear) would then turn around the next day and take Shahar Peer, who famously egged on the Israeli crowd, behind the shed and beat her 61 61.  After the match Masha put her finger to her lips and shushed the crowd and then told Peer at the net that she should've learned her lesson from the day before.  Tennis Channel will be showing this match at 1:30pm EST on Wednesday.

God I miss her.  So much.

Finally, on Thursday at 1:30 EST, Tennis Channel will delight us in a replay of the Chakky/Obziler match, also known as the "When Chak Attacks!" match.  The crowd rained down on A-Chak and she gave as good as she got, screaming maniacally at the crowd after each winner she hit.  It was insane.

All these matches are worth watching so tune in, folks.  They're also showing the China/Spain Fed Cup ties at 4:00pm EST throughout the week.

The Fed Cup Final starts on Saturday and TTC will be airing it live starting at 8am EST on Saturday and 6am EST on Sunday.