Forty Deuce

Kick The Pain Away

Muzz and the boys (including Tim Henman!) came together for a year-end game of footy at Roehampton.  It sounds like a pretty intense one, which Team Muzz pulled out in penalties. 

It won't kiss you back, Muzz.  And therein lies the rub.

Andy, You Idiot.

In news that I have put off discussing because I simply refuse to accept it as true, Muzzard and his "whoa, how'd he land that girl" steady, Kim, have split.  I've never been shy about my love for Kim.  She seemed chill and I loved her style.  Which WAG am I supposed to look to for style tips now?  Yeah, Irina it is.

Word on the street is that Kim got fed up with Andy's obsession with Playstation.  Of course, this is the same "word on the street" that announced that K-Stew was pregnant.  So...grain o' salt, por favor.

That said, as one whose ex-boyfriend used to get pissed because she would rather play another 30 minutes of XBOX than go to bed, I will say this:  Andy, you and me?  We're morons.

Dude, ATP, Hire A Stat Guy

Kick a Ginge

It was indeed Kick and Ginger day in London and Fed was happy to oblige. 

 

After playing a pretty crap first set, (no aces, 5 winners, 13 UFEs), Fed raised his level and started attacking Muzz's second serve and, really, anything short.  The difference was that he was actually making the shots, whereas in the first set he was spraying them everywhere.  After taking the second set 63, he blew Muzz of the court 61. The win locks up the year end #1 rank.

Tough one for Muzz.  He can still make the semis with a win over Fer and get another crack at Fed if he makes the final.  As for Fed, oddly, he's still on the bubble to qualify.  If Elf beats him in 2 and Muzz beats Fer in 2, Fed's out because of the sets won/lost differential.  That makes Thursday mildly interesting.

WTF?!?: Tuesday OOP

 

Fed vs. Muzz.  This will either be a Fed blowout or a tight three set win for Muzzard. 

I'm leaning towards the former.

Day Session 12.30 pm GMT (7.30 am ET)
Bhuapthi/Knowles vs. Fyrstenberg/Matkowski
Del Potro vs. Verdasco

Night Session 7 pm GMT (2 pm ET)
Nestor/Zimonjic vs. Cermak/Mertinak
Federer vs. Murray

And We're Off.

 

Well the hometown boy (not really, I mean, he's Scottish) didn't fuck up on the first day.  So there's that.

The match went pretty much as expected.  Andy was able to control the points early before Elfie got his forehand grooving.  They would split the first two sets and then Andy simply outlasted Elf, taking it 63 36 62.

 

Play on, Playa.

Pic This: The Mad Men Of Putnam, Powell, and Loeb

 

I'd totally watch the spin off.

Pic This: "So You Come Here Askin' Me For A Favor..."

 

ATP WTF, Sponsored By Planters Peanuts.

 

But where are the top hats and monocles?  Talk about a missed opportunity.

Either that or this is a brilliant viral marketing campaign by Planters, a la this.

Ok, I'll stop fawning but I love love LOVE the ties the ATP made for them.  The hunter green and grey?  Swoony McSwoonerson over here.

 

Aaaaaand I've stopped swooning.  Thanks, BonerKillerer.

 

I will say this about Fed.  I'm glad he's procreating so that he can pass on that head of hair.  

 

Ahem.  No kids yet for Kolya.  No coincidence I'm sure.

 

I wonder if Simon Fuller, at some point, will drug Muzz, throw him into the back of a van, drive him to some dark alley, and get a one eyed Asian dentist in a wheelchair to fix his teeth.  Because boy, those things ruin a lot of pics.  That said, they're also why I love him.  I know, I'm not right in the head.

 

Aw, perfect. 

 

Rafa looks so different from picture to picture.  Does the dampness of his hair make *that* much of a difference?

 

It's weird to see Andy actually look bigger than Rafa.

Oh yeah.  This guy.

Welcome To The Hogwart's Reunion.

 

If Shanghai made the boys look like Hitmen, London has turned them all into the most mischievous group of prep school kids this side of Manhattan.  And I LOVE it.

  

The battle for Class President begins here.

Nice to see Rafa's hair decided to dry for this pic.

  

The faves.  Or so "they" say.

  

Cute.

 

Not sure why I can't find his stock picture.  Did someone arrive a little late to the party?

 

Lucky Sod.

Didn't Think It Was Possible For Muzz To Be More Awkward Than He Is.

Then I saw 14 year old Andy.  You go on with your bad self, you gangly Scot.

Air Quotes: A Compliment, Federer Style

Oh, Fed.  Just when I had decided to lay off you for a while...

However, Federer believes he copes with opponents like Murray better than he did in his early days against men like Lleyton Hewitt and David Nalbandian. "I had a lot of trouble against those baseliners early on just because they were too consistent. They could always get one more ball back. Maybe they didn't have the best serve, but I wasn't the best return player, so I couldn't take advantage. My serve wasn't solid enough yet, so I would always get tangled up in those horrible baseline rallies.

"Murray can still do that to some degree, but when I play too well or too offensively I can take time away from him now. And I'm too physical, whereas in the beginning I couldn't do that. I couldn't get around backhands like I can now. Now I can mix up my game too well for him to get under my skin.

"I know what I can do and I know what he can do. When we both play well it's a close match, but I always feel it's the attacker who holds the key to success, so it's up to me whether I win or lose, not up to him. That's why I don't mind the match-up, to be honest.

"It's like when [Pete] Sampras and [Andre] Agassi played. Agassi was more aggressive [than most counter-attackers], but still Sampras held the key because he was serving, pushing the limits, taking the risks. Which Murray doesn't do so much – though that doesn't take anything away from Murray. That's just his game style.

Yes, as an attacking player the game is in your hands.  UNLESS the "defensive" player doesn't allow you to attack.  I'm not saying Fed is wrong.  But JESUS, it just sounds so offensive the way he chooses to phrase it.

Chunnel, 2 Tickets, Please.

Anxious to get home to Kim, I see.

A tired Muzz fell to Steps in three, 16 63 64.  Hungover from the Marat celebrations, perhaps?

For better or worse, Andy wasn't the only seed to fall today, as Kolya and FeVer both lost.  The good news for Kolya?  Fer's loss guarantees Kolya the 7th spot in London.  So watch out, ladies.  Kolya's coming to London and he's...oh, Irina's coming too?  Uh, nevermind.

Fernando's in a tougher position.  He'll have to see how Paris plays out to determine his fate.  If I read the ATP's chart right, Fer is eliminated if Sod makes the finals, or if Jo wins the tournament.  Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

Nice Urn, Andy.

Hate the trophy.  Love the jacket and the ugly mug in it.

Congrats to Muzzard for his 6th title of the season after beating Misha in straight sets.  And congrats to Misha for having a great tournament, beating Gilles and Kolya to get to the final.

Whee!

*SNORT*

Rough Day

Tough day for both Fernando and Kolya, who are still trying to secure spots to the WTF.  Fer was able to come back from dropping to take the second, only to play one bad game in the third to lose 63 26 63.  Too bad.  He really wanted to impress the home crowd on this one.

Kolya on the other hand took the first set only to drop the next two, 64 63.  So the two who are still playing for something get bounced on the same day.  On to Bercy!

 

Go get 'em, Muzz.

Russians, Muzzard, and an Ill-Fitting Hat.

Fer in, Tommy out.  No real surprise there.  It was a clean kill.  But I love with Sergio Tachini decides to abandon navy blue and rock out some colors.  And I LOVE Tommy's red and white kit. 

Same goes for Fred Perry.  Love the red accents on Muzz's kit, even if it looks like Muzz is bleeding from the pits.  He also had a clean win, 4 and 2 over Montanes.

And of course, the Russians are in the mix.  Koyla took out Garcia Lopez in straights and Mischa upset Gilles, 4 and 4.  They'll face off in the other semi.

I love it when Gilles gets all veiny.  It makes me laugh.

Good To See You Again, Red.

It makes me happy to see him again.  Donkeygrooming keeps trying to call me out on my love for Muzzard.  She totally thinks I'm FOS.  "Come on, you would bang that guy over Nole?  You've seen the Speedo pics!" Yes, of the top 4, he is #1 on my list of dudes I would bone down with.  I can't explain it.  I love me the pasty, broody, SexyUgly.

The Muzzard is back in action in Valencia, bum wrist and all, and he's into the quarterfinals after a three set win over Mayer today.  The other top seeds came through as well, except for 8th seed Daveed, who had to retire with a hammy injury.  

In other Muzzard news, as rumored, he'll be leaving Fred Perry for Adidas next year.  It's a huge deal, worth $25 million over 5 years.  Not sure what this means for Nole, whose Adidas contract is up and is rumored to be thinking about K-Swiss.  Here's hoping Adidas has the cash to keep him.  They've already invested so much in the Falcon line.  Though, I guess they can always turn the Falcon into a Buzzard. 

Cheeky British Humor

Ahem. 

So this pic pretty much sums up my impression of the Wimbledon Museum. 

It was unintentionally hilarious.

 

Another gem, which, when you pull back, reveals a third bunny:

 

Random?  Yes.  Awesome?  Absolutely.

 

The Champions display is right when you get to the bottom of the stairs.  I saw this.  I laughed quite hard.  I may have said, "They have the fuckin' Sergeant Pepper jacket???" a little too loud.  I really shouldn't drink before noon.

Fed shoes.

 

Dick shoes.

Muzz's shorts.  Unfortunately I left my glass cutter at the flat. 

Not gonna lie.  Wanted to smell them.

DG kept pointing out ugly pictures of Muzz in the Wimbly Store and asking, "Really, dude?  This guy?"

Yes, dude.  That guy.  To quote Brodie, "I would."

Nice that they gave Lena D some love.  This was her semifinal outfit. 

In a rather impossible feat, it looks even cheaper in person.

 

Billy Jean King and Rod Laver's racquets.  Seemed like something I should geek out at. 

Ashamed to admit I did not. 

There was actually quite a bit of historical stuff about the evolution of lawn tennis.  Here's my problem though: I actually kind of hate grass court tennis.  So it was difficult to actually care.  Also, the whole grass thing seems elitist and Victorian.  As you all know, I am a woman of the people.  It was hard not to roll my eyes at some of the displays.

Enjoyed seeing the white balls though.  Mainly because I like white balls.

Movingrightalong...

 

I was very confused by this.

 

Donkeygrooming found this one.  Shirtless Marat?  Wimbly knows what's up.

 

And in the most random pairing of players on the wall....

All in all it was a fun to see the museum but I wouldn't pay separately to see the stuff that was there.  If you book a tour then the museum admission is included.  One thing that surprised me: How little was made of the GMOAT.  I hope that's because they're trying to figure out how to best commemorate the match.  It would have been really cool to see the grass/dirt stained shirt Rafa wore when he fell to the ground.  Or even some video with commentary.  

Then again, maybe that's not Wimbledon's style.  It's clear from the tour and the museum that they want to focus on the full narrative of Wimbledon and not just singular moments. 

Pic This: Crazy Times

 

Another day in the books.  The men's draw is happily shaping up with some intrigue.

 

It must be love.

 

I mean, they're even pimping the Dolphins?  Stop the madness, ladies.

 

Fucking idiot.

 

Sexy.

 

Awesome shot.  Sad to see you go, Jo.

 

There is so much going on in this picture and all of it is awesome.

 

Oh, be nice. 

Yeah, I couldn't believe my eyes either, Kim.

Tall and Lanky Takes The Day

 

So that happened.

Congrats to my favorite non-mono'd Croatian for salvaging what has been a lackluster season by booking himself into the quarterfinals with the win over THE GREATEST TENNIS PLAYER WHO EVER LIVED (according to the British press).  He executed his gameplan to perfection, serving big and crushing the no-pace sitters that Andy kept throwing back at him.  Tuxedo really didn't let Muzz get away with any of that.  All credit to him.

 

It came out after the match that Muzz has been suffering from a wrist injury for the past few weeks.  In a nice and very professional presser, he refused to talk about it and reiterated that Marin served well and he didn't return well.  That's gotta be tough on the kid though. 

 

I salute you.

 

Tuxedo will take on the quiet giant, who is ever so silently making his way through the draw.

Stop, Drop, and Roll

Before yesterday, none of the top 10 had dropped a set.  Leave it to Muzz and Rafa to be the rebels.  Rafa took the first set over Colin with a bagel, only to drop the next one and close the match out in four.  I hear it was a pretty uneven match from Rafa, but again, I'm from Oakland so I'll just say it:  Just win, baby.

Earlier in the day Muzz had a similar experience, winning the first over Capdeville in dominant fashion, before dropping the second and closing out the next two sets.  Credit to Capdeville for picking up his game in the second set.  But Andy made the necessary adjustments.  Good boys.

Bonus

Just a reminder.  Sam and Elena are the US Open series champs.  On the men's side, Muzz and DelPo finished second and third, respectively, and for the ladies Flavs and JJ finished second and third.  All six are now in the running for bonus money depending on how well they do in NYC.

Let's see if they can cash in.

Scuzzy Muzz

YOU'RE SUCH A LIAR!!!

 

He took a rough tumble in the third and left some skin on the court, but he withstood the at times brilliant and most times numbnut play of Ernie to take it 75 63 75.  It was actually a pretty entertaining match to watch.  Some spectacular shotmaking from both.

 

As for Ernie, yet another beautiful loss against a top 10 player on Arthur Ashe.  Bless, you idiot.

"Smile Like You Mean It."

Good quotage from Muzz in this Times UK article on why he gets up to play the big boys, his support for rowdier tennis crowds, and why he doesn't smile on court.

Murray’s run to the last four at Wimbledon overcame some of the reservations about him among the British public but still there was the accusation that he did not smile enough, that he was too sulky. He remains not everyone’s cup of Lipton’s.

If Murray is still a little taciturn, he says that it is hardly surprising given that he was burnt by the ridiculous, over-the-top reaction to his jokey comment about supporting anyone but England, a furore that rankles to this day.

“Pathetic,” he says.

But he also asks what else people expect. “I don’t go out of my way to ask the general public if they like me or not,” he says. “That’s not really No 1 in my priorities.” He is there to win matches, not to grin.

“I’m never going to smile on the court,” he says. “I don’t see the other top guys smiling and joking when they are playing. It is a serious business. It’s the same in other sports. Before or after you might joke around — I spend most of my time joking around. But when you step on the court it is business. I’ve got three hours to concentrate so that’s what I do.

“I don’t think I do anything to offend people. Sometimes with the way I am on the court, people might not like it — I don’t like it sometimes — but when you are competing you get frustrated. I am sure sometimes you have a bad day at work and are in a bad mood for whatever reason. The difference is that when I show my emotions it is on TV.

It's ok, Muzz.  You don't look that great when you smile anyway. 

Copycat

Fred Perry bites off Adidas for Muzz's USO kit. 

That said, I like it.  I like it even more that Muzz buttoned all the way and clearly pulled those shorts out of the plastic bag about 2 minutes before this pic was taken. 

Nerd.

Riker, Meet Picard.

Brain. Cramp.

Not that the match completely turned on it or anything, but WTF, Muzz?  Stopping play to challenge a serve?  IDIOT.

Nice match from Fed, who played contained aggressive tennis.  Not sure what was up with the Muzzard.  Seemed like he couldn't get a shot over the net to save his life in the first set.  Well, that and he had no first serve whatsoever.  So...yeah.  Probably not best for both your groundies and your serve to break down against Fed.  

GOAT vs. Deuce

Well, Lleyton, at least you made him sweat for this one. Actually it was probably just the heat and humidity of Cincy that caused all that tasty goodness, but you know, you don't have to tell yourself that.  Fed cruised to a 3 and 4 win in an hour and 10 minutes.  It's his 13th straight win over the Lawnmower Man.  Make of that what you will.

So Fed did his part, but what about Andy?  Uh...let's not talk about it.  He beat Apricot in three sets. 

Ok, fine I'll talk about it.  Crap play from Andy generally.  I mean, you really should be needing to fight for a three set win over a Lucky Loser, Deuce.  But Andy did what Andy does and he gutted out the win and basically broke Apricot's spirit.  In case you haven't heard (and seriously, I don't know how you could avoid this news) a 53 shot rally in the second set pretty much broke 'Cot.  He would go on to win only two games after that rally and he looked WIPED.  So once again, Andy "Fitness Freak" Murray outlasted another one.

So we'll get Fed vs. Murray.  6-2 in favor of Muzz, H2H.  This is a big one going into the USO.

Do The Hippy Hippy Shake Shake...

The Lawnmower man with a bit of a resurgent run in Cincy.  After beating Sods in the first round, he's now into the quarterfinals with a quality win over Sam.

Tough luck, Q-Boy.  Now rest up for the USO.

Nole's through without much incident.  Ajde, Falcon!

 

And in the battle of dudes dating chicks hotter than them, Muzz dished a bagel on Steps, who was never in the match.  Muzz is starting to walk around with the strut, folks.  

Muzz is still on track to meet Fed in the semis as Fed withstood a challenge by Daveed, who took the first set from Fed and lead 3-1 in the third before pulling a "Ferrer" and just playing like a stone cold idiot.  But you know, congrats to Fed or whatever.

Rafa just took the court and Gilles and Kolya have split sets.  

Please. Turn Off That Funky Music, White Boy.

I don't even know what to say about it.  But perhaps the best comment was from kefuoe:

"And what's the track, "Unbearable Whiteness of Being"?"

Hey Oh!

(pic from @BryanBros)

Bad From Every Angle

Wasn't it Brad Gilbert who told A-Rod to ditch the visor early in his career because no one fears a dude in a visor?  Yeah, for once, BG was right.

Dude got bounced by Garcia Lopez in two tight sets, 76 76. 

And you *know* the visor made all the difference.


With Elf's withdrawal and Fernando's upset, Muzzard has a straight shot to the semis.

Don't fuck this up, Ramjet.

Ground Down.

Gassed.  Completely and utterly gassed.

That's what back to back tournaments and a grueling 3 setter yesterday will do to you.  More specifically, that's what the new and improved Andy Murray will do to you.  All credit to both players for being able to play their games in rather spectacular fashion (especially Elf for two sets).  I don't know how he was able to dig deep to run down some of those balls and he served so well in tight moments. 

 But Andy did what he did.  He hung in there.  He scrapped and kept his frustration in check to hang in there, even though I was sure Elf was going to run away with it after he broke back in the second set.

 

The hard yards and grueling workouts in Miami were the difference today.  Once Andy took the second set tiebreak the match was over.  There was no way the big guy was going to be able to gut out a third set.  And sure enough, he didn't.  Andy took his second Masters title of the year, 67 76 61.

The win gives Andy a 565 point lead over Rafa going into Cincinnati, where things are just going to get even more interesting.

Cuties.

And Now Introducing The New World #2...

Congrats to The Boy Everyone Loves To Hate!  No, not Nole, Andy!!!

He had to weather the Jo-Dub storm but eventually came away a 64 76(8) winner.  Jo, seriously?  You thought dropshotting Muzz was a good idea?  Aw...you're pretty, but you're dumb.

Andy's ability to go further than Rafa in Montreal means that he'll become the new World #2 on Monday.  This will be the first time since 2005 that Roger and Rafa won't sit atop the standings.  FOUR YEARS!  So crazy.  If he keeps on keepin' on in Cincy he could be #2 going into the Open, and Rafa could potentially bet placed in Roger's side of the draw.  Insanity?  Oh, and apparently if Andy wins Cincy and USO he could be #1.  52 weeks, people.  An oh so crazy, 52 weeks.

Of course there will be the haters who say blahblahblah, Rafa's been injured and didn't play Wimbly, blahblahblah fishcakes.  But I'm pretty sure those people will also remember Fed fans saying the damn same exact thing last year when Rafa took over #1 right around this time.  It was bullshit then, and it's bullshit now.

At the end of the day, Muzz didn't pull a Harding on Rafa.  So he can't control what happened around him.  But can there really be any doubt that he busted his ass for this and unlike some people *cough*Nole*cough* won the matches he needed to win in order to get the ranking?

So how about a little respect.  Kudos to Andy.  Onward and upward!  But watch your back.  I hear the rumbling footsteps of a charging bull not far behind.

Also, I'd like to just preemptively give a mighty hearty chuckle at the fan frazzling that's already going on because "ZOMG!!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!! THE ATP HAS A SLAMLESS #2!!!!"  Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

No Match

Muzz is on fire and not even the wet blanket that is Kolya can put him out.

Le Muzz won easily 62 64 and will face the winner of Fed/Jo, which is going on right now.


As for the ladies, Caro was not match for Lena, once again.  She held serve, like, once, losing 62 61.


So congrats to Lena, who is fast becoming the Kolya of the WTA. 

"Oh yeah, she's still playing, huh?"

Big Boys

Rafa made his triumphant return and actually played a full match, beating Petzscher 63 62.  He looked much better than yesterday, particularly his serve, but every time he lunged for a ball or I heard his shoes squeak to a stop, I cringed.  He take on next, who needed three sets and two calls to the trainer (bum right shoulder, apparently) to get past Hanescu. 

 
As for Nole and Muzz it was business as usual.  Nole looked rock solid today in his win, though no thanks to his Mom shorts.  And Andy made JCF look like an old man in his 1 and 3 win.

Oh and Kolya beat Gonzo 76(2) 75.  Not that you'd know this seeing as how there are no pictures of that match anywhere.

Air Quotes: Andys Stick Together.

Andy Murray on the Wimbledon final:

Q. When if you are watching the very end of it, are you actually cheering for one guy or the other, pulling for one guy or the other?
ANDY MURRAY: No. I mean, I think that -- it's tough, because I mean, a lot of people obviously wanted Federer to break the record. It wasn't like I was anti- Federer breaking records, because I've said all along I think he's probably the greatest player ever. So that was never sort of a doubt in my mind.

You know, sometimes it's nice, you know, when you have guys like Roddick who a lot of guys have sort of written off for, well, a number of years, you know, for no reason at all, just, you know, saying that he's not going to win another Slam, it would have been nice to have seen him, you know, win, as well, because he's been around in the top 10 for so many years now and been a great player for so long.
It's just nice when you see guys having a chance. You know, I think he even said a few years ago he didn't necessarily know if he was going to get another opportunity and he came unbelievably close at Wimbledon.

That was nice to see, and I wouldn't have minded seeing Andy win.

Um...Why Are You Wearing Clothes?

Horribly disappointing.

But at least he won, taking a tight match over Polanksy the Canuck, 64 76(6).  Nole was an error machine so there's still some rust to shake off.  But survive and move on, I always say.

Muzz returned with a fairly easy win over Jeremy, 4 and 2, and JCF scored a solid win over Lleyton, 1 and 4.  And in the marathon matches of the day, Haasi, Fer and PEHK all notched wins over Ivo, FeLo, and Big Byrd, respectively.  Really nice wins for Tommy and Techno. 

And it looks like Fed finished up his match, taking it 76 64.  From what I can tell from FedFans, his serve was awesome but his groundies were rusty.  But he picked it up in the end.  I still don't like the striping on his Nike kit, but the color is nice.

Play continues in Montreal, with Gonzo.

Singles - Second Round
[1] R Federer (SUI) d [WC] F Niemeyer (CAN) 76(3) 64
[3] A Murray (GBR) d J Chardy (FRA) 64 62
[4] N Djokovic (SRB) d [WC] P Polansky (CAN) 64 76(6)
[8] N Davydenko (RUS) d P Mathieu (FRA) 76(4) 76(2) 

Singles - First Round
[10] F Verdasco (ESP) d F Lopez (ESP) 61 67(5) 61
[15] T Robredo (ESP) d [Q] A Bogomolov Jr. (USA) 64 62
[LL] A Golubev (KAZ) d [16] R Stepanek (CZE) 63 64
P Kohlschreiber (GER) d [17] T Berdych (CZE) 76(5) 67(9) 64
[Q] J Ferrero (ESP) d L Hewitt (AUS) 61 64
V Hanescu (ROU) d J Melzer (AUT) 64 63
J Isner (USA) d [Q] J Levine (USA) 63 64
[Q] A Falla (COL) d D Sela (ISR) 64 36 63
[11] F Gonzalez (CHI) vs [Q] M Raonic (CAN)
D Ferrer (ESP) d V Troicki (SRB) 63 60
T Haas (GER) d I Karlovic (CRO) 46 76(3) 64
[Q] J Hernych (CZE) d [Q] J Benneteau (FRA) 62 63 

Doubles - Second Round
[7] M Mirnyi (BLR) / A Ram (ISR) d [WC] R Nadal (ESP) / F Roig (ESP) 46 63 10-8

Doubles - First Round
L Dlouhy (CZE) / P Petzschner (GER) d P Kohlschreiber (GER) / S Wawrinka (SUI) 62 62

I Gotta Feeling, That Tonight's Gonna Be A Good Night.

Pics from last night's Montreal player party. 

Or at least pics of players who actually kept their clothes on during the party. 


That's a lot of look, Tommy.  A lot of look.


The hair.  It kills me, Fer.


That's just a whole lotta adorable.


Does the ATP have a Manorexia problem?  Carbs a good thing, boys.


Oh, Andy. 

You were totally beat with an ugly stick but I heart you lots.

Alex Corretja 92%

Wait for it

I Get Stomach Cramps Just Watching This

I highly recommend you watch this video with the sound up.

Back on Court

Andy's back on court in Miami, getting ready for the US hardcourt swing. Nothing funny or snarky to add. I just thought it looked like a fun drill.

Don't Quit Your Day Job. Or, In Ana's Case, Do.

Oh, funny JJ. I miss you so.


Seriously? SERIOUSLY, USTA???


I could stare at his pasty white bicep all.day.long. SexyUgly rules.

Pic This: America, Fuck Yeah!

If I walked into a dark alley and saw these two waiting for me, I might have to shitting the pants.

Pardon if there's no blogging for a while.  I need to run out and find me that cardy.

Obligatory "Fuckthatguyhemakesitalllookssoeasy" picture.

Miles!!!  Nomnomnom...

Not this year.

Getting ready for Sunday, I see.


They make take my life, but they're never take away my Judy!

Alba gu bra!  Alba gu bra!

When did B-Decks turn into Bridgette Wilson?  Weird.

America.  Destroying the dreams of people of all race, creeds, religions, and fandoms.

Happy Independence Weekend, everyone! 

Remember, 10 fingers is equal to greater than or equal to 9 fingers.  Be responsible.

You Made Kim Sears Cry. I Hope You're Proud Of Yourself.

Behind those aviators lie the eyes of a sad puppy. 

Well congratulations are in order, I suppose.  Congrats to A-Rod for being the nail on the on Wimbledon coffin for me.  Everyone tells me I'm supposed to think SW19 is the greatest thing since sliced bread, but...no.

But seriously, A-Rod deserves much props.  I totally thought he would be Muzz but I didn't want to believe it.  But the guy's serve is clicking, he's in great shape, and he's playing with clear purpose and focus.  He won't beat Fed but I'm not sure anyone would on Sunday.  So sure, why not, let's send the American Bully into Center Court to get slaughtered.  Why not?

 

As for Muzz, he'll be fine.  He played well (apparently, seeing as how NBC WON'T SHOW ME HIS MATCH FOR ANOTHER 2 HOURS!!!), but A-Rod was just serving too well today.  It happens, and it definitely happens at Wimbledon.

Q. Overall, how would you assess this tournament?

ANDY MURRAY: I think it's been very good. I did better than I ever had before. I had some very good matches. And, you know, I thought I played good tennis.

I thought I dealt with everything that was sort of put in front of me well. You know, I'll come back next year and try and do better.

But it was a good tournament. Wasn't bad at all.

Q. On that point, you went a round further than last year; you're 22 years old. You'll leave here more convinced that you can win Wimbledon now?

ANDY MURRAY: Yeah, I think I have a chance. And I think the way that I played this year, you know, it was very, very close to getting to the final. If I give myself those sort of opportunities and keep playing well, and my consistency in the Grand Slams the last year or so has been much, much better, you know, a final, a semi and a quarter, I'm going to give myself opportunities to do it.

I believe I can win a Grand Slam, whether it's Wimbledon or US Open or Australia or whatever, I'm going to give myself chances.

Q. What is the overriding memory or lesson that you take from this slam to put into future matches?

ANDY MURRAY: I'm not sure. I mean, I need a bit more time to think about that. But, like I said, it's been a very good, productive tournament for me. I think, like I said, I played well. You know, unfortunately the last few slams that I've lost I've come up against some guys that have played great, great tennis.

You know, mentally for me, I've got much better at it, understanding that guys can do that against you. That's happened to me a few times now in slams. I need to keep making sure I bring my best game to the court in every match.

See you in 5 weeks, Muzz.  Spend some time some time with your ugly girlfriend. 

As for A-Rod, have fun getting fucked in the ass by Roger on Sunday.  Hope his dick doesn't break off.

I'm Rooting For The Underdog

So a debate has been raging on for quite some time now (2 days) between Victoria and me regarding who's the hotter WAG: B.Decks (Victoria) or K.Sears (Moi).  We are now at an impasse.  So we open up the debate on this rather slowish tennis news day.

More pics after the jump (seriously, this was a really embarrassing post to put together at work).

Pic This: Oh Come On, He's So Ugly He's Cute

The puppy, I mean.

Yeah, I'm Gonna Need Some of That In Or Around My JJ Area

AHHHHHHHH!!! KATE!!! 

I love her so much I want to take her out back behind the middle school and get her pregnant.


Easy quarterfinal win for the man, the myth, the Muzz.  Much deserved after that tough one over Stanley.

The Muzz brings out Ewan and Kate.  'Nuff said.  Go Muzz.

On The Line

Looks like Muzz got a load full of pizza in his belly, a good 12 hours of sleep, and he was all smiles and relaxation during his light practice.

C'mon, Andy!

If you're wondering how crazy Murray Mania is, look further than the queue for walk up tickets. 

These people have been camped out since before yesterday's match ended. 

Oh, and 54% of the TV sets in Britain were tuned into Mr. Muzz's match.  So...yeah.

Pic This: "It's Business, It's Business Time..."

The BEST.DAY.EVER. started with a whimper and ended with a bang. 

We can't have it all, people.


Unless your name is Mirka.  In which case, you *can* have it all.

 
Um.  No thank you.


"You want a piece of this?"

It's official.  Tennis needs to have pre-match staredowns, a la boxing.  Because they are both awesomely intense and you never know if you're about to watch a sporting event or porn.  So, win-win!

Shhh!  Do you hear that?  Listen oh so carefully and you can hear the sound of a thousand blades of grass screaming.

Yes.  He did it again.  Oh, and FYI, reporters, "slapping the bull" is nothing even close to resembling "The Robot."  Come on.

Did anyone else think it was really inappropriate for the world feed cameras to be shooting Ana all gyno style?  Show some class, fellas.

Seriously?  What is this, 2002?


Yes, she won.  No I have no idea when she's due.


But what does it all mean....


Yeah, so I'm gonna need some of that in and or around the general vicinity of my JJ area.


Sometimes it's really creepy how much Andy looks like Judy.  Oh, and while I'm at it...

K.SEARS IS WAY HOTTER THAN B.DECKS!!! Suck it!


Yes, Tranny scares me.  But she has one of the most awesome "Win Smiles" in the game.  Pure joy.

 
Open your heart, Andy.  Let us in.

In an unfortunate setback for race relations, Venus and Serena double bageled Jay-Z & Co.  Thanks a lot ladies. 

So...you refuse to sign with a clothing company but an insurance company with a lizard mascot put together a deal that sounded appealing to you?  O...k....

Oh, Dina.  Inapporpriate.  In.a.propriate.  Besides, Momo has no idea what that means.

Andy Murray Wants To Get Inside Your Head.

He's all...not dour. Shock!

Raise It.

So...I think that roof is going to work out pretty well. 

I couldn't watch the zamazing Stan/Muzz match, but I was listening on Radio Wimbledon and the crowd sounded awesome.  Gave me chills.  The atmosphere was absolutely electric.

Stan played so well.  But in the end Muzz's quality won out with the help of the support of an entire nation.  And for all who think he's the Big Blue of Tennis, kid got pretty emotional after he won.  Word on the street (read, cbox) is that he cried a little bit. 

But a hearty salute to Stanley the Manley, who played his guts out and pushed Muzz to the brink.  Stan is one of those players who I always frazzle over when I see him in my fave's part of the draw.  That backhand is a thing of beauty.