Hey, did you guys know that the Australian Open Wildcard Playoffs are going on right now? That's right, tennis that matters is being played all across the globe right now. Down in Australia, a bunch of people you might know (Jelena Dokic, Alicia Molik, Carsten Ball, Sam Groth, Peter Luczak) have been fighting it out for a wildcard into the AO main draw. You know who doesn't have his hat in the ring? Two-time junior Slam winner and all-around "HE'S THE FUTURE OF AUSTRALIAN TENNIS BUT ALSO A TOTAL PITA", ATomic Bernie.
See, wee little Bernie, who we last saw whining because Tennis Australia dared give him the prime-time slot on Rod Laver, which just so happened to be after his beddie time, pulled out of the AO playoffs with an "undisclosed illness." This means that the only way he's playing AO is if he goes through qualies (against way stiffer competition, mind you) OR Tennis Australia grants him one of their last remaining wildcards.
Oh, does it matter that after he withdrew from the tournament (days before it was set to begin) he was seen practicing for two hours? No. Of course not.
Said Peter Luczak, "You couldn't have stopped me from playing this. Twisted ankle or broken leg, I would have been out here trying."
Whatever. Despite Tennis Australia's purported effort to give their misbehaving youngsters a kick in the pants, and despite AO Tournament Director Craig Tiley's "annoyance", you know, YOU JUST KNOW, he's getting the wildcard.
But gosh, do I dare hold out hope that TA will grow a pair and say no to the kid?
Nah. Not even I'm that dumb.
BUT, I will forgive you your trespasses if you grant Robbie a wildcard, TA. Because I'm that petty and hypocritical.