Forty Deuce

Pic This: Stretching With Leather Goes To Asia

Ana's in Seoul and is supposed to play her first round match today against Dushevina but it's forecast to rain all day.  So here are some pictures with my favorite member of Ana's team.

You just keep doing what you're doing, Leather.  We loves it.

"Hey Maria?  What means the term 'man hands'?"

More pics from the tourney here.

Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em.

Forty years ago this week, nine women, fed up with the inequality in treatment and prize money offered to female tennis players by the USTA (then known as the USLTA) and other tournament organizing bodies, bailed on the USTA and signed $1 contracts to form what would eventually become the WTA, currently the largest and most successful professional women's sports organization in the world.  They were suspended by the USTA, a rival circuit was started in an attempt to squash them, and they were branded a bunch of "crazies". 

Flash forward 40 years and the WTA is the world's leading professional sport for women with over 2,200 players representing 96 nations competing for over $86 million in prize money at 53 events and four Grand Slams in 33 countries.  Just last week, Kim Clijsters took home $2.2 million in prize money. 

How do you like dem apples?

The first stop on the newly formed Virginia Slims tour (which would eventually become the WTA in 1973) was Stanford.  Billie Jean was at the Stanford tournament in July and did a short press conference.  It was absolutely awesome to be able to sit and listen to her talk about the formation of the tour and what it must have been like back in the early 70s, to risk your career and your on-court legacy, to stand up for yourself and forge what would become an incomparable legacy not only as a champion of women in sport, but of women's rights in general:

Some choice quotes:

You have to remember in 71, a lot of people weren't real happy with us when we started.  A lot of players were afraid to join us.  And we had two tours, two circuits, because the USTA started one against us which was very difficult at the time.  I wanted everyone to be together.  That was the whole intention when we started. We lost $3000 the first year.  I guess that's where my prize money went.  So I made zero or minus money that year.  But we were very excited and very scared and we weren't sure what was going to happen to us.  But it was the first tournament of the Virginia Slims series in 71. 

All we wanted to do was to get professional tennis going, we weren't worried about winning majors.  In fact, I must say, the tour was probably more important to us than the majors at that period of our lives.  But we knew that we were taking tennis to the people and you could think about the kids who were going to come watch and could dream about playing the tournament and then going on to the majors.  We knew eventually we wanted it to be international, but we had to start someplace and the opportunity was in the United States.

This was for me personally, if I had to weigh them at the time it was more important to me than just winning matches.  Because I always think about things that are lasting and not just temporary.  When you perform it's very temporary.  When you win you get a trophy.  But this is lasting.  This could be passed down to future generations.  And I thought that was much more important, that we could make a better life for more people this way. 

When people ask me about the 70s and they ask me what's the one word that comes mind, I go "tired".  I was going on about 4 hours of sleep a night.  We had a lot of meetings in 71 and 72 to try and get the WTA started.  A lot of things were happening.  And a lot of people were happy with us, a lot of people were unhappy with us.  The media was being tough, they labeled us as "crazy" because we were women.  I used to say "if I were Jimmy Connors doing this you'd just say he's just trying to create opportunities as a business guy."  No one ever perceives me as a business person.  It's very interesting.  Yet if I were a guy, they would.  It's just all these things you have to deal with.  But it's fun. 

I wanted to start matching up the hearts and minds of people with Title IX.  That was 72 and I played Bobby in 73.  And tennis exploded after we played, participation wise.  It became the 8th most popular sport in the country.  And, the men's tour by the way, which people always forget about, got their first big television contract and the women's tour got their first big contract, in 1974 and that's because of that match.  So that was a great springboard to helping our sport not only here but worldwide.  People have no idea.  The men never talk about it because they don't like to.  It really helped the men's tour a lot, the tennis went way up and women's tennis went way up right after that match.  So I'm glad I played him.  I didn't want to play him.  He followed me around for three years and then he beat Margaret Court so then I had to play him.  So I always thanked him.  Men who are in their 40s and 50s now come up to me and tell me that match changed their whole philosophy, the way they brought up their daughters.

Muchos gracias to Billie and the OG9.  Without them, what ever would I spend my time snarking about?

LadyCott!

The top six Spanish ladies have had enough and they ain't gonna take it no more.  Last week they announced that they would be ladycotting (yeah, I made that up for shits and giggles) next year's Fed Cup because they don't feel like they get any support from the RFET (the Spanish tennis federation).

The problem areas include a lack of medical resources and structure for women’s tennis, a decrease in the number of ITF tournaments held in Spain, a lack of structural investment, and the need for greater professional support for the Fed Cup team. According to the players, these issues were presented to the Federation in 2009, but no improvement has been made. The letter concludes, “Very much against our will, we have been forced to take a unanimous decision to stop playing and forming part of the national team for the 2011 Fed Cup.”

The RFET was all "The fuck?  What you bitches be talkin' 'bout?" and issued a 13 point reply that basically amounted to "Nuh uh" and "Ok, fine we'll promise to do what we already promised to do but didn't actually do but no seriously this time we'll do it we promise" and "ZOMG, that is so weird that you brought this up!  We were totally *just* going to give you 200k Euros!  What a coincidence!"

But the ladies were having none of it.  They've got Arantxa and Conchi on their side and they basically told the RFET that until they actually, you know, DO SOMETHING, they're not going to be going on any tours of the finer side of Estonia with Kaia any time soon.

I'm all for players standing up for themselves so kudos to Team Spain, Lady Edition.  That doesn't mean that MGMT or Vives are off my ess list, or really, any of them thanks to this piece of international relations genius, but all power to them and I hope this forces the RFET to pony up some lady dollars.

Seoul Sisters.

The besties are back in action in Seoul.  Here's the draw, which is headlined by Nads.  Vania and Shveddy are also in the doubles draw.  Tashkent is also a thing and, not that Lexi doesn't already know this, Chakky's there.

As for the boys, Marin heads up the field in Metz, which is almost entirely comprised of Team Step Up 3D.  And the tour dirtballers try to pick up some cash in Bucharest.

 

John McEnroe: Champion of Women.

I was too busy in New York to sit down and write about J-Mac's "controversial" comments that women should play less because their minds and bodies are too weak for the game.  I suppose I could have just linked to Johnette Howard's great response piece, but I actually had some thoughts on the issue so I shelved it.

To put it in J-Mac's terms, my frail little fingers just couldn't blog after my grueling tennis journey to adequately put my thoughts into words.  Don't worry, John.  I learned my lesson.  I'll just avoid the road next time and blog from the kitchen.

But getting back to his comments, I suppose I could summarize my thoughts thusly: Huh?

So women just can't take the physicality and emotional tax of the current game.  They're just injured all the time and that's because they're weak. Let's not even get into the fact that this is John McEnroe, king of emotional meltdowns, saying that women having an emotional breakdown of the court signals some mental weakness and inability to cope with the stress of the game.  Not that we should be shocked.  Who couldn't roll their eyes when he kept bringing up Vera's penchant for emotional meltdowns as being a signal of weakness in her game throughout her USO run.

Look, I don't disagree that the current schedule is pretty rough on players.  Has it led to more injuries?  Probably.  But that's not the point J-Mac's making.  If it was then this would have been a non-story.  The point he went out of his way to make is that women, as opposed to men, can't take it.  Our bodies are just too frail, our minds just so full of...nothing.  We just aren't strong enough to handle the rigors of this game. 

Everyone's entitled to their opinion.  But let's look at some facts, shall we?  Serena cut her foot in a bar brawl, Justine is out for the year because she fell down on the court, Vika bonked her head in a freak sprinting accident and had to retire from the USO.  None of these players were injured due to a physical breakdown over the course of a long and grueling season. The same can't be said about the top men's players who had to skip the Open due to injuries (Delpo, Jo, Gonzo, to name a few).

Do I think the season is too long?  Duh.  The game is absolutely more physical today than it was 5, 10, 15 or 20 years ago.  It's obvious that players' bodies are breaking down at a rate that probably wasn't happening in the past.  But it's more physical for both tours and J-Mac's singling out of the women was not only insulting, it was just plain wrong.  Are we really going to ignore Rafa's knees, Nole's lungs, Delpo's wrist, Jo's knees, Lleyton's hip, or Gonzo's knee when we talk about how the women can't seem to take the grind? 

For every Dinara's back we have a Delpo wrist.  For every Masha's shoulder we have Rafa's knees.  It's equal on both sides.  The game is indeed more physical, more grueling, and more punishing.  And it affects everyone equally.  I don't think I'm making any huge logical leaps here.

I mean, how could I?  My brain is just not strong enough.

The onus is on the players to craft their schedule.  Obviously the top players have more freedom to do so.  They can focus on the big tournaments and not play day in and day out because they're not playing to put food on the table.  The lower ranked you are the more you have to be concerned about playing to pick up paychecks.

So if Caroline wants to play 25 tournaments a year and she can handle it (which, by all metrics so far, she can), then let her.  It's not the WTA's responsibility to say "No, no, no, honey.  Your cute little 20 year old body can't take that.  We know better than you.  We're going to force you to scale it back."  In the same vein, if Sam hurts her arm, realizes she's already played more matches in 2010 than she had in 2009, and wants to skip two mandatory tournaments to take a nap in Tampa, let her. If JJ sprains her ankle and chooses to play on it despite the fact that it's still hampering her, that's her perogative. 

The point is that all players are different.  They are individuals with different concerns, different needs, different physiologies, and different approaches to their career.  Painting them all as "weak women" seems a bit on the wrong side of things.  If you want to say "X" player should scale down their schedule because their body doesn't seem to be handling that amount of match play, then I suppose I wouldn't have a problem with that (assuming you had some facts to back it up).  But lumping them all in a bucket?  Generalize and stereotype at your peril.

I'm not naive.  I know there are lots of behind the scenes considerations that drive a player's schedule.  I know the top players can get a lot of pressure to play tournaments they wouldn't typically play because the tour needs to deliver a marquee player to an event.  But as far as I know, the players can still say no.  If I'm wrong on that then whoops.

All this is to say that I have a healthy dose of skepticism whenever some dude comes in, no matter what his name is, and advocates some sort of ceiling on their productivity or capabilities, based on his own personal biases that are not grounded in fact.  Let the women play.  And if they're too weak to deal with it the data will show that.  But it hasn't. 

So STFU.

Pic This: Ding Dong.

Someone on Twitter said that Davis Cup pwns all other tournaments in pictorial awesomeness. 

I have to agree.

Pensive Tomas.

Sluuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp.

Davis Cup Hoss.

Cheerleader Nole.

This week on Broadway: Guy Forget as Monsieur Thenardier!

Oh, Stanley.  Sadz.

Daddy shaved!

Spongebob is a Sod fan.  This explains...so much.

*Everyone's* obsessed with what's between his legs.

Meh.  Not so much.

Pic This: Emo Needs a Hug!

Bonus Nole after the jump.

Trophy Hoister Sunday

Many congrats to Jarmila Groth, who clinched her first title in Guangzhou and will crack the Top 50 for the first time of her career.  She's had a great summer, reaching the round of 16 at both RG and Wimbledon (whichismorethanIcansayforSambutwhateverI'moverit) and had a pretty dominant tournament, dropping only 10 games on the way to the final and firing 11 aces against Alla to win. 

Her reward?  A vase for her flowers and a first round match against Nadia in Seoul.  Ouch.

And Tamira beat Bethanie to capture her second title in Quebec City.  I'm really bummed for Bethanie.  She's just such a tour stalwart and she had a heartbreaking USO.  Would have loved to see her pick up a title here.

Relegators! Mount Up.

Huge comeback win for India, who have finally made it into World Group I by coming back from an 0-2 deficit against Brazil to take the next three matches.  Nice wins by Bopanna and Somdev in singles to clinch this one.

Austria was pretty stoked too, bouncing Israel 3-2.

Romania clinched 5-0 over Team Lappenti.

Mardy Fish was the man in Bogota, winning all three of his matches (with a little help from Big John) to take the tie for the Rodless, Bryanless, Americans.

Sod sealed the win over Italy, beating Goth Bols (yes, he still kinda plays tennis) to clinch it today.

Team Techno dusted the South Africans, 5-0.

Rather inexplicably, Team Kazakhstan rolled over the Fedless Swiss, 5-0, to make their first World Group appearance.  Make glorious nation, boys.

Meanwhile, the decisive matches in Cairns were rained out.  They'll resume play tomorrow with the Roos up 2-1.  They'll be without Lleyton though.  He sprained his face mugging.  Or hurt his wrist in doubles.  Either way, he's out for a few weeks.

Ajde vs. Allez.

Janko Tipsarevic.  Davis Cup Hero.  Has a nice ring to it.

Serbia came back from 1-2 in the tie to book their spot in the Davis Cup finals for the first time ever and they pretty much have Janko to thank for it.  He won both his singles ties, beating Berd and Steps to dig ther Serbs out of the whole left after NeNole couldn't come through in the doubles yesterday.  His hair is shaggy, his beard is long, and his balls, they are big.

Serbia will host Team Step Up 3D, who bounced the Argies 5-0.  This should be a cracker of a tie but I already give France the edge.  The DC final will be held immediatley after the London Championships.  You have to think Serbia's going to have to field an exhausted Nole, once again.

But we'll worry about that in two months.  For now, congrats to these hard working boys.  Two much deserved champions if you ask me.

Sigh. Here We Go Again, Argies.

Mr. Davis Cup didn't come through today in the rubber the Argies absolutely needed after Mikey Llodes beat Pico in the first rubber of the day.  Gael, tennis' version of a "box of chocolates", came out firing, taking an aggressive game to Nalby and using the home court to his advantage.  There would be no brainfarty trick-shotting today and as a result, Argentina finds itself in a 0-2 hole going into tomorrow's doubles.  You have to think it'll take a miracle to pull this one out.

Over in Belgrade, Janko was the man of the hour, stepping up to take out Tomas in four sets to even the tie at 1-1.  Too bad Viktor couldn't step up to beat Steps.  I really thought that was the rubber the Serbs were going to win.

Nole says he might be fit for doubles tomorrow but will definitely up to play Tomas on Sunday if that rubber is necessary.  I would love to see some Nenad/Nole dubs.

Required Reading

• Great interview with Stubbsy and RayRay.
• I got ya, Tignor.  Reacclimating is weird.
• Thanks to TSF, I now know what I missed when I was nose deep in Honey Deuces.
• I laughed out loud at Strawberries and Scream's assessment of Fed's kit.
• More shredding of CBS/ESPN's coverage, which got crap ratings, to no one's surprise.
• A nice take on Rafa and Nole from Pete Bodo.
• The best part of this piece from Shane Bacon at Busted Racquet?  The last line.
• I 100% agree with Chris Chase's take on why Ashe doesn't need a roof.
• Ravi Ubha's best and worst of the Open.  Thanks for giving Sam and Elena some love.  Speaking of which, isn't it fun when people lament the lack of quality women's matches, yet admit in the same breath that they didn't bother to see the one everyone was talking about?
• Greg Couch shows D-Young's parents P-Mac's book.  Hilarity (and a fun article) ensues.
• Non-required required reading: A great piece on the whole "women in locker rooms" business.

Enjoy the Pepto, Nole.

Davis Cup. It's Happening.

I've been a bit pre-occupied with some other posts so for everything you need to know about the Davis Cup semis (and a bit of a Pico chaser), head over to Brodie's site.  He did the hard yards.  Give him some love.

Bee Tee Dubs, can we just talk about what a bummer it is that Tennis Channel has chosen to cover the France/Argie and US/Colombia ties as opposed to the Serbia/Czech tie?  I know the France/Argie tie is a tighter one, but damn if I don't want to see some Nole/Tomas on my TV.  Oh wells.  Streams it is.

Oh, and in case you didn't know, Gael's fine-tuning to Davis Cup:

*eyeroll*

Whatever.

You Guys.

You know, because the first hug just wasn't enough.

Pic This: Permagrin.

Rafa got a standing ovation when he walked out at Bernabeu stadium during Real Madrid's Champions League match.

 

Those cheeks are getting a workout, that's for sure.

 

What I Did On My Summer Vacation: A Summary

This is a bit of a selfish post.  I needed to put it together so I had a one stop spot to pull these posts up and I kind of needed to remind myself of what the hell happened over the course of these past five weeks.  I plan on writing up some posts about my experiences on the road so if you have any questions or are curious about anything, feel free to ask in the comments.

In case I need to re-familiarize people with the story:  I basically did the blogger version of the US Open Series this summer, attending Stanford (with a press pass), San Diego, took a week off to hang with friends, and then made a very rash decision to keep it going, flying to Cincinnati for the ATP tourney (with a press pass), then New Haven (press pass), then on to my first Slam in New York, where I stayed around until both Ana and Sam lost.  

So here's a collection of my favorite posts.  If I've left one out that you enjoyed, feel free to remind me in the comments.

Stanford

• My daily reports: Day 1, Day 2, Day 3, Day 4, Day 5, Day 6, Days 7-9.
• I single handedly fucked up the draw for Dinara, Ana, and Masha.
• I attended my first All-Access Hour with Mono, Lena, Sam, and Aga, which was so much fun.
• Caught some great practice video from Masha (here and here), Ana, and Sam (here and here).
• Steph and I were the first to see the besties be besties.
• FD Photographer Emeritus' Greatest Hits: Aga's shorts, Dinara and Vika, Dinara's modeling shots, Sam being Sam, kids spazzing over Ana, Sam and Pop, and Ana fistpumping Leather.
• Though I didn't do too bad with my camera either: Sam, Lindsay, Dani,
• I got to sit in on my first press conferences and it took everything in my power not to just pop some popcorn and sit back: Masha, Vika, Ana, Sam, Aga, Mels, and Vika and Mono.
• Masha was involved in some crazy entertaining matches.
• And Vika won.

San Diego

• After Stanford, Steph and I drove down to San Diego.  And I got punchy and talked a lot of nonsense in the car.
• My reports: Here, here.
• FD Photographer Emeritus' Greatest Hits: Dinara looking adorable, players roaming the grounds, lots of MaKiri, 
• Dani got into it with Lynn, Kleybs wrung her sweat out on Sneki,
• I reunited with Sam, short-lived as it was.
• ZOMG, I totally forgot about "I Love You Facebook!"
• Remember when Bepa got busted by Coq au Vin?
• We discovered MaZheng.  And it was glorious.
• And Sveta won.

Cincinnati

• I made a really impulsive decision.  And I went to Cincy and arrived just in time for the ladies final.
• Cincy was basically about hot boys.  Here, here, here, here, here.
• Fernando gave us an awesome new motto.
• I said hi to Andy.  In the creepy way I do.
• I got to sit in on Andy and Rafa's pressers.

New Haven

• I somehow made it to New Haven in time for Sam and Franny's pressers.  And the rain.
• Marcos and Vezzie proved how awesome they are.
• Dinara and Sam had some pretty big wins, for entirely different reasons.  And then...they didn't.  But that didn't stop it from being a pretty successful trip for me.
• I caught brief glimpses of Mel, Blah, PetKo, and Tommy.
• And I bore witness to a really awkward frat party.

US Open

• I popped my Slam cherry..
• Daily reports: Qualies, Day 1, Day 2, Day 3, Day 5, Day 7, 
• I totally Serbed out.  Hard.
• I saw me a whole lotta Sam.
• And a whole lotta Ana.
• I caught this series of pictures, which might be my most favorite thing ever.
• I even waded through the pit of people and sweat to take some Rafa pics.
• I caught the PetKo dance.
• I left New York depressed.
• And most importantly, I became besties with Robbie and Genie.

Man. That Falcon Flies Fast.

As if the kid hasn't already earned a standing ovation, Nole's back in Belgrade with the boys preparing to contend the biggest Davis Cup tie in Serbian history against the Czechs.

"I can't predict how I'll feel on Friday but you always find the strength and energy when you play for your country in such an important match."

Tomas is well-rested, obviously, after his first round loss in New York.  Who knows how it will all pan out but bless Nole for being there. 

Isniacki: More Unconsummated Sexual Tension Than Twilight.

 

Thanks to Demtria for the tip!

Do We Really Have To Explain This Again?

Man, I thought after the JJ/Dinara at #1 debacles of 2009 everyone would understand how tennis rankings work.  But I guess with the Slam season over and ensuing tennis lull beginning, it's that time of the year for beating up on easy targets in order to bolster your big name favorites.

My Google Reader is inundated with stories with headlines that can only be summarized as follows:

"ZOMG, YOU GUYYYYYZZZ!  KIM WON AND DROPPED IN THE RANKINGS BUT TEARSY CRYERSOVA JUMPED UP AND IS NOW RANKED HIGHER?!?!?! WTF!!!!!!"

Even Tennis Channel's Court Report, which could have reported on anything in its 30 second spot, decided to ZOMG Vera's ranking. 

I can sit silent on the couch in my pajamas eating cold dim sum delivery watching Bones reruns no longer.

365 days.  That's what the rankings measure.  Your performance over the past 365 days.  Not your 2010, not your last 10 years, and certainly not the public's perception of your tennis prowess.  Now I'm sure that last point is really what gets into people's pants.  "BUT THE RANKINGS DON'T REFLECT HOW I RANK THESE PLAYERS IN MY HEAD!!!"  Well, I don't know what to tell you there, fair-weather fan.  But if you actually paid attention to these players and to this sport on a weekly or daily basis, you'd see that the rankings are precisely right.

Has Kim had a better 2010 than Vera?  Yes.  How do we know that?  Because the Race points say so.  The Race points, which measure performance FOR THE SEASON, put Kim one spot ahead of Vera.

Has Kim had a better last 365 days than Vera?  Not based on points.  Kim won the 2009 USO and didn't play again.  Vera kept playing through the fall season and picked up some points.  Not a whole lot of points, but enough to put her ahead of Kim. 

How does this confuse people?  How does it cause hand wringing and hair pulling?  I seriously don't get it.  If Kim takes the rest of the year off and Vera fails to defend her points and falls behind Kim, are we going to see a bevy of "KIM IS SITTING ON THE COUCH EATING BON BONS YET SOMEHOW JUMPED A SPOT IN THE RANKINGS!!!!" articles?  Doubtful.

If anything, given Kim's year, it's impressive she's as high as she is.  She won Brisbane, Miami, Cincy, and the USO, sure, all fantastic and amazing performances in big tourneys.  But she also got dumped from AO, IW, and Wimby, and she completely skipped the clay season, including RG.  She's quickly falling into that Serena category:  A player who can dominate any time she shows up, but you don't know (1) if she'll show up and (2) whether she'll bring her A game or F game.

So here's my question for everyone:  Everyone likes to take a piss at the rankings system.  But it's way easier to tear something down rather than offer solutions.  So what's the alternative?  Give more point weight to the Slams?  Stop rewarding the tour stalwarts who clock in and out each and every week so that a tour even exists?  Force the Serena and Kims to play more so that their rankings are more "true"?  Add a qualitative element like the college football polling system?  Or will the rankings system, no matter what, always be the source of easy jokes?

Weigh in in the comments.  I'm genuinely curious to hear some proposals.  And if you can't think of a viable proposal, maybe it's time to put down the haterade.

Required Reading

• Read this fantastic takedown of CBS/ESPN's "coverage" of the men's final.
• Some really great stuff in Boyfriend's post-USO Mailbag.
• It's not a matter of "when", but "if" my man will ever win a Slam.
• 50 thoughts on the US Open from Boyfriend.  Kind of have to agree with his Sam assessment.
• Interesting piece on the actual cost of these fucking rain delays.
• Tignor's report card.  I think he's pretty fair with his assessments.
• And of course, some Rafa ink here and here. 

Aw. They Kissed and Made Up.

Head's tribute to Nole. Though personally, I'd rather see Nole's tribute to head.

Pic This: Take A Nap, Rafa. You've Earned It.

These would make great desktop backgrounds.

(Source: Daylife)

Pic This: Men.

Just gotta love the love.

 

Looking forward to many more years of this, gentlemen.

Tuesday Tunes

Pic This: No Thank You.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! 

PUT THE SUNGLASSES BACK ON, YOU ALIEN!

Oh put a ill-fitting extra-large sock in it, James.

Stop taking fashion advice from Rausa, Christy.

Pic This: Stand and Deliver.

It's hard to believe that the 2010 Slam season is officially over.  There was heartbreak and heartwarm (that's a word, right?) over the past nine months and I for one have enjoyed every minute of it.  Ok, maybe not that one night in January, but otherwise, it's been pretty great.  Ok, that one afternoon in May kinda sucked, too. 

Where was I? 

Oh, right.  I realized this afternoon that I never did a proper Pic This entry for the USO.  Shame on me. 

So here we go....

Cultural Learnings of Serbia and Australia for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Forty Deuce

While I was in New York, I hung out quite a bit with Serbs and Aussies.  And bless them, they let me ask all the stupid questions I've always wanted to ask and they were even patient enough to speak slowly to the dumb American.  Here's a bit of what I learned:

• Aussies and Serbs are really friendly, good natured folks.  Who can drink.  A lot. 
• Serbian pride, paranoia, and fatalism is way fucking real.
• Beer is completely regional in Australia.  So if I plan on taking my "tracking" to Gold Coast, I better practice ordering Fourex beer.
• Novak is indeed the most popular sportsman in Serbia.
• Yelling "That's the way!" and "Love your work!" are really Aussie things to do.
• Anastasia Rodionova has fans.  Weird.
• JJ's like, the real deal in Serbia.  They love her and her fashions.  No really, AND HER FASHIONS.
• Watching a tennis match involving a Serb with a bunch of Serbs basically sounds like this: "AJDE! AJDE! AJDE!" --> "Oh my God, you're going to lose." ---> "IDEMO!!! COME ON!!!" ---> "Oh my God, you suck at tennis."  ---> AJDEEEEEEEE! You can do it!!!"  --->  That ball was out!!!  The stupid line judge!!!  It's a conspiracy!!!"  ---->  "AJDEEEEEEEE!"  ---> "WHY DOES HE/SHE DO THIS TO ME!?!?!?"  ---> "Yeah!  He/She won!"   Aaaaaand...scene.
• Ana's used sweaty visor reeks.  Novak's used sweaty cap does not.
• There is a really complicated Sammy Stosur song that is sung to the tune of a Vegemite jingle that I tried to learn while mildly intoxicated and failed miserably.
• Australia Day is a very big deal in Australia and they love that it falls during the Aussie Open.
• Americans like Lleyton more than Aussies do.  No one told me that.  That was just an observation.
• JJ's cousin wants to be a pop star and JJ wasn't happy about it.  But they've since made up.  Probably because JJ finally saw how awesome this video is:
  
  
• While I already knew "Ajde" and "Idemo", my new favorite Serbian cheer is "TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" (prounced "toe").  So fun.
• Never ever mention Fosters to Aussies.  

Thanks to my educators!  You guys were bomb.  That's American for "awesome".

Pic This: Never Forget.

Leave it to Srdjan to make the fashion statement of the tournament.

Best. Shirt. Ever. Made.

The Best of The Rest

While the singles champs gave us a lot of warm fuzzies, there were a bevy of great stories unfolding on the outer courts as well:

 

How about Vania and Shveddy?!?  They had to endure an ill-timed rain delay that stopped the match in the third set at 4-5, 0-15, on Vania's serve.  But they were able to come back and upset Liezel and Nads to claim their SECOND STRAIGHT Slam title.  Good stuff.

 

Daria Gavrilova, Girls Champ.  Her name is Daria.  She is automatically awesome.

 

Jack Sock (love the name, but it really does sound dirty), the first American boy to win the USO juniors since A-Rod.  Fantastic run for the unseeded Sock.  (See?  Sounds weird).

And Liezel and the BryBros won a bunch of stuff.  Moving on.

I Am Rafa. SUCK IT.

A win is a win, a title is a title, and a record is a record.  Regardless of how you get there, once you do and are able to secure that notch on your belt, there should be no further discussion.  We say it all the time as fans: "It doesn't matter how you get there, just get there."

But that's all a lie.  It's a lie we tell ourselves as sports fans to normalize results, to add legitimacy to results that sometimes, let's face it, kind of leave a bad taste in our mouths or leave us scratching our heads.  It stops us from starting sentences with the oh so groan-worthy, "Yeah, he won, but..."

So bless Novak and Rafa, who played a fantastic final yesterday and on this day, unfortunately for Nole fans, Novak showed the world precisely how good Rafa is.

I received a very gracious invitiation from Chris Chase over at Busted Racquet to participate in a live blog of the men's final (you can still read our quips here).  For 3/4ths of the final, I found myself agonizing over and on behalf of Nole.  There was a lot of facepalming, a lot of head dropping, a lot of "WHAT ARE YOU DOING????" cries to the heavens.  It wasn't until the reality of result began to set in in the middle of the fourth set that it suddenly dawned on me:

Nole played really really well.

He really did.  He didn't choke, he didn't come out out flat, he didn't have too much respect for Rafa.  He came into this match and tried to stand toe-to-toe with Rafa.  The Falcon threw everything, including the kitchen sink, at Rafa, and Rafa dealt with all of it. 

Let's not forget, Nole saved, like, 20 break points, on a guy who came into the USO as the best in break point conversions.  And Rafa didn't choke those 20 BPs away.  Nole earned them.  And every time you thought Nole was going to pull a Nole 1.0 and roll over, he sacked up, whipped out his gigantic schlong, and played with guts and courage.  It was unbeliebable.

So why the hell am I spending paragraph after paragraph talking about Novak when Rafa's the one that made history?  Because Novak's gutsy performance makes Rafa's moment even more spectacular.  Perhaps the moment of the match I will always remember is Rafa serving three ridiculously placed wide serves at 15-30 at 5-4 in the third, to shut down any momentum Nole was gaining in his attempt to break back and get back into the set.  That was the match in a nutshell.  Nole working so hard to get a perceived advantage, and Rafa stepping up and shutting it down as Nole could do nothing but stand and watch. 

To quote Fernando: Rafa was too much Rafa today.

And that's what makes Rafa's historic win that much more satisfying.  On a surface that people considered his weakest, off a summer filled with confusing sub-par performances, at a time of the year everyone assumed him to be fatigued, on a stage he had never stood, faced with a more than worthy opponent who played to win, Rafa stood tall and showed every facet of him improved game, hitting shots that seemed unhittable, getting balls that seemed ungettable, and achieving a feat that no one thought was achievable when he first came on the scene, let alone a year ago.

And that's Rafa.  Just when you think he can't, he does.

He's like, really annoying like that.

Two Guys, One Cup.

Here it is. The full trophy ceremony, uninterrupted, which I am compelled to post after the debacle that was the TV coverage today. The match started on CBS, was moved to ESPN2 after the rain delay, and just as Rafa got his hands on the trophy, ESPN2 unceremoniously and rather abruptly switched coverage to NFL. It was a shining moment in sports television history. Keep it up, Bristol.

You have to love the class both these guys showed not only during their match but after. To all the people who pick on Nole because they think he's a pompous dick, you can go fuck yourselves. And you know what? I'm pretty Rafa would tell you the exact same thing.

Done and Done... and Done... and Done.

Live Blogging: Get My Quippy Quips. LIVE.

I'm live blogging with the boys at Busted Racquet.  Come and watch the action from your pathetic cubicles, Dilberts.

Get Her, Nads!

Lost in all the shuffle with the men's final, the ladies dubs final had to be suspended with Vania King serving in the third set at 4-5, 0-15.  In other words, King/Shvedova are 3 points from losing.  That's a tough spot.  The match will resume at 4pm EST on Armstrong.

Nice to see Nadia anticipated the rain and brought her wetsuit, though.  Always prepared, that one.  Except...not really.

[whispers]Because she's crazy![/whispers]

Required Reading

• Novak gets a shitload of print and deservedly so.  I still think people should fess up and post their pre-written Fedal pieces.
• Cute stuff about Sam's childhood time capsule, but does she seriously have an outside shot at #1?
• Uncle Toni doesn't believe in being muzzled.  He is also still awesome.
• Roger who?
• If you have never seen wheelchair tennis, you really need to try.  Saw some at the USO and it's absolutely phenomenal.
• Always love the Global Sports Forum.
• You know why it sucks to be a British tennis player?  Because you have to read crap like this.
• Not really reading, but helloooooooo, Dima!
• Some post-final stuff on Kim.
• Apology accepted.
• Linked to this before, but it still cracks me up.
• Having now been to the USO, I find it difficult to argue with Tignor's take.
• This Open has provided some beautiful moments.  But there were also some heartbreaking ones.  And Uncle Jamie recounts the Top (or bottom) 10.  (Scroll down to his Day 12 entry -- GET SOME PERMALINKS, MAN!)

Air Quotes: I'd Rather Be Lucky Than Good.

“You are lucky!  Seriously lucky!”

-- Nadia Petrova, to Nole in the locker room.

“For sure, it’s fairer like this. I think it’s better for both of us to have a day of rest.”

-- Rafa

“For us, it would have been better that it had not rained today, because Djokovic might have been a bit more tired.  But it was fairer like this.”

-- Uncle Toni

“Obviously, Rafa would have preferred to play today, and Novak was praying for rain, so I suppose what I take out of things is that God is Orthodox.  He’s been listening to Novak.”

-- Benito Perez Barbadillo, Rafa and Novak's publicist.

The article's a great read.

Pic This: Uh...Not Just Trophies...

The Onion takes on Rafa.

Lord Have Mercy On The Workin' Man.

As expected, rain washed out the men's final today.  It's been postponed to tomorrow at 4pm EST.

The winner?  Novak, obviously.  And really, can we be mad?  As Mary Carillo pointed out, the kid deserves a day of rest after his epic performance against Roger yesterday.  And as my Dad pointed out, "Well, no excuses tomorrow."  Can't argue with Dad.  Let's put the two healthy boys on court and see how the chips fall.

The losers?  The fans.  I'm unemployed so I don't really give a shit either way.  But I know a lot of friends who were pretty amped to see this final, but will now be stuck at work while this potentially historic match is played tomorrow afternoon.  I also know plenty of fair-weather fans (no pun intended) who would have settled in to watch this match today, but won't even remember (or care) that it's going on tomorrow.  Obviously this impacts rating, which impacts CBS, which, while I have zero sympathy for CBS like, ever, has trickle down effects on the popularity of tennis.

So for those who want a high-quality, competitive final, the rain is good news.  But for those who want to actually watch the high-quality, competitive final, you're hosed.  Sorry.

Mommy, Didn't We Do This Already?

All I wanted was a competitive match.  I didn't get one.  59 minutes, 2 and 1, 20 straight matches for Kim on the blue courts at Flushing.  Kim held up her end of the bargain.  She bounced back after playing two sub-par matches to actually bring her game in the final.  If both players brought their best, my sense was that this would be an easy win for Kim.  Kim brought hers but Vera didn't and this one went embarrassingly quick.

Vera said she couldn't physically raise her level and that the fatigue prevented her from finding her game.  Interestingly, she said that made her feel a bit better about the loss.  She tried her best but just didn't have the physical capacity to do any more.  They say that one of the reasons the USO is so hard to win is because of the back to back turnaround of the semis and finals.  While the fatigue may have been something for Vera to hang her hat on, let's not forget that she played the early semifinal, hadn't dropped a set all tournament, and didn't have any long singles matches (though she did play doubles).  Kim on the other hand had two tough, long, three setters leading into today's final.  Vera's not using fatigue as an excuse but I just find it surprising that she couldn't recover from her semi for last night's match. 

Anyway, it was a snoozer.  And Jada knew it too.  She wasn't all that impressed with her new baby food canteen.  

"Nah, it's cool.  I got one of those already."

 

So congrats to Kimmy, who survived and thrived to defend her title and capture her third straight USO crown ("that she competed at" caveat, of course).  May your untamed locks power you through to a deep run in Australia.

 

Seriously? You Couldn't Find ONE Djokovic Fan?

Wish they talked to this guy:

Spoiler Alert.

And so it went.  

It has been absolutely ridiculous and appalling how little respect Nole was given leading up to yesterday's semifinal clash with Fed.  Ok, I get that people were writing Rafa into the final because he was playing Misha.  But commentators and journos were barely even mentioning this semfinal match, skipping it to discuss the ABSOLUTE MOTHERFUCKING GLORYGASM of the almost guaranteed Rafa/Federer final. 

If Novak needed any bulletin board material he didn't have to go looking through comments by Fed.  He just had to open up the newspaper.  We're talking about the #2 and #3 players in a semifinal match wherein, NO ONE EVEN BOTHERED DISCUSSING THE #3.  He was a minor blip on the way to a Fedal final.  No one hid their hard-ons for the dream final and just the thought of Nole or Misha spoiling it for everyone was apparently too much to take.

And thus the table was perfectly set for an upset.  This was a perfect opportunity for the Tennis Gods to teach a lesson in humility.  Humility to tennis fans, to journalists, to commentators, to everyone who buys into the idea tennis matches are decided on paper and not on a tennis court. 

There's that overused cliche: "That's why you play the game."  It's a cliche because it's true.  

The match itself was four sets of oddity punctuated by one of the best sets of tennis I've ever seen.  Novak's always played Fed tough on hard courts.  In addition to the lopsided second and fourth sets, which Nole won at 1 and 2, the first and third sets were tight affairs that were decided by a few points here and there. 

Then came the fifth set, and everyone (including die-hard Nole fans) expected Nole to crack under the pressure.  I spent a lot of time last week talking to tennis fans about Serbian psychology and one thing I've come to appreciate, especially when it comes to Novak and JJ, is their paranoid and fatalistic nature.  As the crowd grew vocally pro-Federer as the match wore on, I could see that "Well, everyone's out to get me" look creep across Nole's face.  It made me think that he already had one foot on a plane back to Belgrade.

But oh, those match points.  Novak would say after the match that he just closed his eyes and swung as hard as he could.  If it went in, great.  If not, oh well.  Ah, there's that fatalism that I know and love.  "If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.  If not, I tried my best but you can't beat the gods."  That fatalism has gotten Nole in a lot of trouble in the past.  In fact, it's probably been the deciding factor in quite a few of his tight matches against the top guys.  

But not yesterday.  If you're a non-fatalist then you argue that he stepped up, whipped out his gigantic schlong, and hit two amazing shots to save match points.  If you're a fatalist, then you smile and say that he stepped up, whipped out his gigantic schlong, and the gods anointed him worthy.

 

Either way, the result is the same.  Nole stepped up, stood toe to toe with Roger in a tight fifth set, saved two match points, broke, and then dug out of an 0-30 hole while trying to serve for the match to eventually secure what could easily be seen as the biggest win of his career. 

As for Fed, much will be written, once again, about his demise.  Whatever.  Sure, he lost another match with match points.  But Nole hit two ridiculous shots to save them.  As far as I'm concerned, Roger didn't choke this one away.  He just came across a very good player, who matches up well against him, who played beautifully. 

Hard to argue with Janko on this one.  I've always bristled whenever I've spoken with journos or fans who bash Nole.  It's fine if you don't like the kid but I guess what bothers me is when people don't even attempt to understand his situation.  Unlike the other Top 4, the kid is literally the number one athlete in his country and his popularity isn't confined to his status as an athlete.  He is a huge public figure.  The kid, at 23, is the king of his small but very proud sports-centric country.  It's hard enough to play tennis for yourself, but imagine having an entire country on your shoulders every time you step out on the court.  Shit ain't easy and as a young guy you're going to fuck up every once in a while.  But he's a good kid, trying as best he can to navigate his insane position, all the while being painted as the bad guy every time he steps on court. 

I'm not sure where I was going with all that, other than to say I feel for everything Nole has to deal with and it makes wins like this that much sweeter.  Be the bad guy, Nole.  Be the spoiler.  It suits you.

Correction, Motherfucker!

That was sent by CBS *during* the second men' semifinal yesterday.

Yes.  It was corrected.  By this guy:

 

Perhaps the most appalling thing about the whole debacle?  Despite knowing that the original tweet was wrong, CBS *waited* until the conclusion of the second semi to send out a correction.  Guess they were reeeeeeeeeaaaaaally hoping Fed was going to get them out of a jam, on many many different levels.

Air Quotes: America. Fuck...Yeah....

Q. How did you feel after that ceremony right there? What are your reactions to that? How special does it make this occasion to you?

MIKE BRYAN: To have the ambassador of Pakistani and India here, it's a special occasion. It shows that it's bigger than just a tennis match. And these are cool. These are 5,000 years old. Who knows? Might make this into a couple of shirts. (Laughter.)

Let Me Scoot Over, Venus Fans. The Bus To Bummertown Is A Bit Full This Week.

I could write a long post about this match.  But really, it would be a clone of this one. I might as well do a find-and-replace-all for "Sam" and "Venus" and be done with it.  Because once again, it's not the fact that Venus lost.  It's how she lost it.  And once again, there are only questions, no answers.  For the second straight match the story isn't Kim.  The story is how the person standing across the net from Kim found a way, somehow, to hand the match over to her when she wasn't playing particularly well.  

I feel for you, Venus fans.  This one hurts.  I would offer you alcohol but to be frank, I've run out. 

I know everyone is basically handing the trophy to Kim but I honestly don't see why (Boyfriend Jon audibly scoffed at the notion of Vera raising the trophy on US Open Tonight).  She's now played two matches of non-trophy-hoisting tennis against opponents who collapsed in the moment.  The last quality match she played was against Ana in the Round of 16, and let's be real, she really only had to play quality tennis for a few games before Ana collapsed.  Her serve has sucked, she's prone to double faulting, and while her movement has been solid, she's prone to fits of racquet decceleration and thus, UFEs.  Sure, Vera hasn't had the toughest draw, but she did at least beat Caro playing way higher quality tennis than Kim has.  Hell, Vera hasn't dropped a set all tournament.  

Sure, there's a lot to be said about Kim's "Houdini-like" ways.  But again, it's not like she stepped up her game in the last two matches and worked her way to a win.  We're talking about pretty major choke jobs by her opponents.  Kim. Didn't. Do. Anything.

Do I think Vera's going to win tonight?  I don't know.  Do I think she can?  Fuck yeah, she can.  I honestly don't have a strong rooting interest.  I like them both, I like the stories that come out of either of them winning, and at the end of the day, I'm just rooting for women's tennis.  I want this to be a competitive final showcasing the ladies' amazing athletic ability and shotmaking.

But, you know, go Vera and whatnot.

BOOM. Did I Just Blow Your Mind?

When I was in New York I had the pleasure of meeting and speaking to someone in Bepa's camp.  I told them that she looked fantastic in that NYTM piece and that the fans really loved it.  He was surprised (a) to hear that Bepa had fans and (b) because according to him she doesn't think she's beautiful enough to do those types of shoots.

And I was sad.

Bepa's played lights out tennis throughout the fortnight and put an exclamation point on her campaign so far with a solid and fairly thorough beating of Caro today to make her second Slam final in a row.  I'm not sure anyone walked away from that match thinking the better player lost today.  Bepa showed her variety, pace, guile, and movement to outclass the kid who everyone had already written into the final.  It was fantastic to see.

Of course, the match was not without its Bepa moments.  She somehow broke the strings on five racquets and actually ran out of racquets.  Sergei had to send a racquet down to the court until the stringers could get her some fresh ones.  I was sure that the whole debacle would rattle her.  But it didn't.  She stayed calm and composed and pretty much made the Johnny Mac and Mary Carillo look like idiots for all their harping about her propensity to meltdown.  In fact, after she was finally broken in the second set, John announced "Prepare yourself for a meltdown."

If by "meltdown" you mean a win, then yes.

As for Caro, it was a good tournament and nothing to hang her head at.  I think she did a lot to get many of her detractors (including moi) off her back. But at the end of the day, she's totally beatable by the top players.  We knew that coming in and we know that going out.  But her win over Masha has to give her confidence that things are going the right way. 

One interesting comment was brought up on Twitter.  Can Caro win a major title without the benefit of on-court coaching?  Carlos Ramos admonished her today to make sure her box stopped with the chatter.  I think there's something to this theory given her listless play in that second set.  She just didn't look like she knew what to do out there.  That's an experience issue.  She's only 20.  You need some years of "tennis education" to get to the point where you can figure yourself out of matches.  She's way ahead of the curve on this (I think she's one of the smarter younger players) but she didn't have it today.

Much love, Vera.  I can't wait to see all the ink you're about to get.  It's so satisfying to see people take notice of you.  Much deserved to the forgotten Russian.

The face of crazy, ladies and gentlemen.

We should all be so lucky.

Riiiiiiiiight.

I don't know how to lead off with this so I will just say it:  The US Backgammon Federation (USBGF -- though, don't ask me how they snuck that "g" in there) is presenting an honorary lifetime membership to Ana.

This is the most amazing ruse by a bunch of geeks to ask out a hot girl since...well...every John Hughes movie ever made.

Air Quotes: I Am Youzhny. And I Am Bad.

Q. You know that most people, most tennis fans, will want to see Federer and Nadal in the final. Are you going to be a bad person and try and ruin that?

MIKHAIL YOUZHNY: Yeah, I'm ready to be bad person. I love to be bad person in this case. (Laughter.)

Q. What are your better shots? How would you describe your game?

MIKHAIL YOUZHNY: No easy now say I have to serve like Isner or play forehand like Federer, something. I play like Youzhny. (Laughter.) But, you know, actually I have to be enjoying court, first of all. And after, it will be possible.

Man. I Would Have Paid Bank To See Her Bitch-Face.

Halpert asked out K-Stew.  It went about as well as you'd think.

Stick to Woz, Johnny.  Keep it simple, big guy.

Caroline Wozniacki Sitting In A Tree. Oh, Wait...

Again, if you're not on Twitter, I get it.  But far be it from me to let this slide.  Caro is like, an insanely good Twitter-flirter.  And, not to imply anything, but she's the village bike of the tennis Twittersphere:  Everybody gets a ride:

Fer:

 

Nole:

 

And of course, The Tall One:

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Hey big-timer!! How is life? havent heard from you in a while!

John
@CaroWozniacki don't try this crap again woz! Another text I sent you and another heartbreak for me btw fantasy soccer??? cmon now

Vika:
@JohnIsnerTennis @CaroWozniacki should I just follow u guys?

John:
@vika7 woz never responds to my texts. congrats btw

Vika:
@JohnIsnerTennis she always responds u on the other hand not really))))

John:
@vika7 hmmmm im not so sure about that

Caro:
@vika7 What?? I always answer your texts.. How can you be on his side? Very disapointed !!

Vika:
@CaroWozniacki I'm with u I said he doesn't answer. How could u think about me! Lol

Carol:
@vika7 Hahah!! Sorry girl!! My bad!! You are right!! thanks

John:
@vika7 stop taking here side vika!

....
Few day later
Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis what happened?

John
@CaroWozniacki rolled my ankle up 5-3 in the first set . Good job today!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:05:56 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Nooo! How bad is it? did you get an mri?
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:06:26 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John
@CaroWozniacki I just did. I think ill be fine but it looks nasty ugh.
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:07:35 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Oh im sorry! I know, have been there! Is it very swollen?
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:08:41 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John:@CaroWozniacki unfortunately yes. I know u have been here before!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:10:03 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis Ok Rest up well!! Ice ice ice.. leg up and you will be ok!! (Says the expert.. haha)
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:11:32 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

John:
@CaroWozniacki thanks doc!
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:12:40 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to CaroWozniacki

Caro:
@JohnIsnerTennis haha! You are welcome.. any time lol
Thu Aug 19 2010 03:13:52 (Central European Daylight Time) via web in reply to JohnIsnerTennis

It's gotten to the point that the tennis elder statesmen are on the case:

The BryBros:

 

Lindsay:

Oh, Woz.  You're such a tease.  It's kind of awesome.

(Screencaps from Tennis Forum)