Forty Deuce

And Now The Video We've All Been Waiting For...

All joking aside, kudos to the WTA. Lately they've been making a concerted effort to pimp the lesser players. Pimp them for what? I dont know. But pimping nonetheless.

Air Quotes: "Also, I didn't sleep well. And I nicked my forehead shaving. And they only had plain bagels. And..."

Missed this the first time around, but Blah after his loss to Consumption:

Q. How did you feel out there physically?

JAMES BLAKE: Not my best. A little bit of an upset stomach. I don't know if that's from the heat or nerves. I don't know what it's from, but had an upset stomach and didn't feel great. Actually got a lot better in the third set. Maybe because it cooled off, I don't know. But I was feeling okay after that.

My toe was reacting pretty well. That hopefully is not gonna be a concern at all at the Open. That's a positive to take from it.

I'll Have The Two Item Combo, Please

With all this talk about more combined North American events, this little bit slipped under my radar.  Tennis Canada isn't talking about combining the events a la Indian Wells or Miami.  Oh, no, they've decided to be stupid about it:

 Tennis Canada is considering a plan to combine the ATP and WTA events in Toronto and Montreal into one tournament featuring men and women playing at both venues in the same week, starting in 2011.

Under the plan, each city would stage one half of the men's main draw and one half of the women's.

Montreal and Toronto would stage one final apiece, meaning one of the men's and one of the women's finalists would switch cities, making the one-hour trip by private jet.

Setting aside the potential marketing upside to this, how can they possibly think this is a good idea?  Roger is apparently in favor of it, but not so much the ladies:

Q. On a different topic, this tournament is thinking of switching formats in 2011 where half of the women and half of the men will play in Toronto; the other half would play in Montreal until the final when somebody would get on a plane and fly to the other city. I can see by your expression you haven't heard of that. I was wondering what you might react to that. 

DINARA SAFINA: Well, better that they keep it like it is now. It's much more nice, because it's completely going to be different final. Somebody's used to play here, and suddenly you have to fly from Montreal. 
I don't know. Better they thinking one more time about this, because I don't think it's a great idea.
...
Q. This tournament is considering something different in 2011 when the men's draw and the women's draw will be the same week. They're thinking about having half the men in Toronto and half the women in Toronto, half the men in Montreal and half the women in Montreal with the finalists flying to the other city. 
MARIA SHARAPOVA: I think that's a bit ridiculous. 

Q. Really?
MARIA SHARAPOVA: In the same week flying to other cities? 

Q. Well, the finalists from Toronto would have to go to Montreal. The women's finalists from Montreal would have to come to Toronto. 
MARIA SHARAPOVA: Who told you about that one? 

Q. Oh, Tennis Canada is talking about it, a way to generate interest, give Toronto and Montreal a feel for what a mixed tournament is like. 
MARIA SHARAPOVA: I'm not sure I can comment on that one. I haven't heard about that one yet. I think I'll need to get more info before I can comment. 
I thought of both the men and women coming together, but I didn't hear us flying from Toronto to Montreal to play a same tournament. I haven't heard that one before. 

Combined is combined.  This is baloney.  I assume that the top seeds will have their side of the draw in the city where the final will be held and the other half will play elsewhere.  But if you're going to treat this tournament like a high profile Masters 1000/Premier 5 event, then you know what?  Don't turn it into a circus.

Air Quotes: Snarkpova

"Yeah. I'm actually having a competition with myself to see how many errors and double faults I can make and still win the match in two sets. It's pretty interesting."

-- Masha, after her 17 double fault win over Bammer.

Air Quotes: Gold. Pure Gold.

Q. How disappointed are you right now?
DINARA SAFINA: Disaster. I'm really disappointed, but you know, big tournament is coming up in two weeks, so basically it's tough to forget now, but hopefully tomorrow will be better and get ready for the US Open.

Q. What happened with your serve today?
DINARA SAFINA: It's not the serve. It's just my brain. I know exactly what I have to do, but if I'm not using my brain, I'm not doing the things that my coach is telling me. Just too bad from my side and too disappointed with myself.
...

Q. You called your coach down before the third set and then halfway through the third set. What were you asking him to help you with?
DINARA SAFINA: How he can help me if I'm not doing anything. I have a game plan, I step on the court, and I do completely the opposite thing. 
Just for strategy even he left the court, because he says, It makes no sense that I'm sitting there, because you don't do the things. So better lose and do your things. At least you are moving forward. But when I'm telling you one thing and you do completely the opposite thing and you're losing, you're just moving backwards.

Andy Roddick...Headcase?

Could it be? Could that Wimby final have completely rejiggered his brain so that he is, officially, not clutch?

These tight losses are mounting up.  His last 4 losses?  The Wimbly final, DC final in a tight third set tiebreak, Montreal semifinal in a tight three setter, and now second round of CIncy, losing to Sam, 76(11) 76(3).

Afterwards A-Rod would say it was "just a bad night."  Yeah, that's one explanation if you get blown out.  But Sam matched him shot for shot.  Oh, and he blew a 5-2 lead in the first set tiebreak.  I don't know....

Meanwhile, Rafa had to weather the storm (literally and figuratively) to come out on top of Seppi, who played well.  God must be a Fed fan, as the rain caused a number of stoppages in play, most notably during the second set with Rafa facing a break point on his serve.  Of course, because Rafa is Rafa, he came out after the break and boomed an ace.  Awesome.

 

And in the battle of The Sex, Steps won.  Yes, these are the times we live in, folks.

Singles - Second Round
[1] R Federer (SUI) d J Acasuso (ARG) 63 75
[2] R Nadal (ESP) d A Seppi (ITA) 76(4) 76(3)
[3] A Murray (GBR) d N Almagro (ESP) 76(3) 62
[4] N Djokovic (SRB) d [Q] I Ljubicic (CRO) 76(5) 64
[Q] C Guccione (AUS) d [7] J Tsonga (FRA) 76(12) 62
[8] N Davydenko (RUS) d I Kunitsyn (RUS) 62 16 63
[16] R Stepanek (CZE) d [WC] M Safin (RUS) 46 63 61
G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) d [Q] M Youzhny (RUS) 75 63
P Mathieu (FRA) d I Karlovic (CRO) 76(9) 64
[LL] J Benneteau (FRA) d J Melzer (AUT) 62 36 62
T Berdych (CZE) d P Petzschner (GER) 76(8) 67(7) 64
J Chardy (FRA) d [WC] J Isner (USA) 67(1) 63 41 ret.
L Hewitt (AUS) d B Becker (GER) 63 63

S Querrey (USA) d [5] A Roddick (USA) 76 

And As Pinky and the Brain Do Every Week, They Fail.

One day after Venus fell in straight sets to K-Bond, well, all fucking hell breaks lose.  Dinara, the Oracle that she is, foreshadowed her loss to Rezai last week during her post-match interview with Rezai.  What seemed like a random funny would prove creepily true as Rezai took her out in three sets.  The highlight/lowlight of the match?  Zeljko deciding he had had enough and leaving the court for good in the third set.  Oh, and somehow, Dina would still get a coaching violation from the chair.  It's always something with the Coconut.

The next big name to fall on Wednesday was Flavia, who played like crap apparently in her loss to The Gypsy.  Then Caro, who is officially in a slump going into the USO, lost to the always dangerous Jay Z in straight sets.  

The Kimpossible Comeback Train chugs on in Toronto, as Kim scored her most impressive victory so far, taking out Vika 75 46 61.  

Yet another three set loss from Vika who just seems to go away or get dominated in third sets.  Very peculiar from a kid, though I might not like her, seems to have a great competitive streak and be in good shape.  I went back to check her results since Madrid:

• Lost to JJ in Cincy 75 76(4)
• Lost to Pova in Cincy 67(4) 64 62 
• Lost to Serena at Wimby 62 63 
• Lost to Dina at RG 16 64 62 
• Lost to Szavay at Madrid 46 62 62

Peculiar, no?  I really don't know what happens to her in those three setters.

So how else to cap off a spectacularly craptastic day then to watch Ana play solidly (in fact, play *well*) for a set and a half to Lucie, only come back to see that she's been blown off the court in three sets.  I mean, honestly, a loss to Lucie isn't something to lose that much sleep over.  The woman has weapons and from what I can tell, even in the first set, she was on, swinging freely and hitting crazy angles.  Hopefully Ana can take something positive from her early level of play.  I wonder if she'll take a WC into New Haven.  She really really should and I'm sure they'll have a bunch of players withdraw (Sam and Flavs, for example).

Singles – Second Round
Aravane Rezai (FRA) d. (1) Dinara Safina (RUS) 36 62 64
(2) Serena Williams (USA) d. (Q) Yaroslava Shvedova (KAZ) 63 62
(4) Elena Dementieva (RUS) d. Ai Sugiyama (JPN) 63 62
(5) Jelena Jankovic (SRB) d. Patty Schnyder (SUI) 75 64
(7) Vera Zvonareva (RUS) d. (Q) Roberta Vinci (ITA) 63 63
Zheng Jie (CHN) d. (8) Caroline Wozniacki (DEN) 75 63
(WC) Kim Clijsters (BEL) d. (9) Victoria Azarenka (BLR) 75 46 61
(Q) Lucie Safarova (CZE) d. (11) Ana Ivanovic (SRB) 36 75 63
Virginie Razzano (FRA) d. (12) Flavia Pennetta (ITA) 63 61
(14) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) d. Agnes Szavay (HUN) 61 61
Alisa Kleybanova (RUS) d. (16) Dominika Cibulkova (SVK) 61 46 76(4)
Alona Bondarenko (UKR) d. (Q) Alla Kudryavtseva (RUS) 63 60
Maria Sharapova (RUS) d. Sybille Bammer (AUT) 63 76(5)
Shahar Peer (ISR) d. Francesca Schiavone (ITA) 76(2) 64

Doubles – Second Round
(1) Black/Huber (ZIM/USA) d. Kirilenko/Vesnina (RUS/RUS) 64 75
(4) Hantuchova/Sugiyama (SVK/JPN) d. A.Radwanska/Wozniacki (POL/DEN) 64 62
Amanmuradova/Kudryavtseva (UZB/RUS) d. (5) Hsieh/Peng (TPE/CHN) 46 76(2) 105
(6) Llagostera Vives/Martínez Sánchez (ESP/ESP) d. (WC) Kuznetsova/Mauresmo (RUS/FRA) 63 60
Kleybanova/Makarova (RUS/RUS) d. Jans/Rosolska (POL/POL) 76(5) 63

Doubles – First Round
Benesova/Zahlavova Strycova (CZE/CZE) d. Dulko/Peer (ARG/ISR) 61 46 100
Hradecka/Voskoboeva (CZE/KAZ) d. Bondarenko/Bondarenko (UKR/UKR) 61 46 108

Thursday OOP

Stadium (from 11.00hrs)
1. Shahar Peer vs. Elena Dementieva
2. Alona Bondarenko vs. Serena Williams (NB 13.00hrs)
3. Kateryna Bondarenko vs. Agnieszka Radwanska
4. Maria Sharapova vs. Vera Zvonareva (NB 19.30hrs)
5. Kim Clijsters vs. Jelena Jankovic

Grandstand (from 11.00hrs)
1. Samantha Stosur vs. Virginie Razzano
2. Aravane Rezai vs. Alisa Kleybanova (NB 13.00hrs)
3. Zheng Jie vs. Lucie Safarova
4. Kleybanova/Makarova vs. Hantuchova/Sugiyama

Court 1 (from 11.00hrs)
1. Hradecka/Voskoboeva vs. Dushevina/Rodionova
2. Benesova/Zahlavova Strycova vs. Medina Garrigues/Ruano Pascual
3. Stosur/Stubbs vs. Senoglu/Shvedova

"What Do You Want To Do Today, Brain?" "Same Thing We Do Every Day, Pinky -- Try And Take Over The World."

Ahem.

Pinky and the Brain hitting the practice courts in Toronto.


Well, Pinky hit the practice courts.

Brain just hung out in the shade and carried a racquet around to look official.  But come on, dude.  At least make the effort to tie your goddamn shoes.

(Pics from Sodapop)

Pic This: Oh, Kaia

Always good for a lolz. 

OMG, Take Off That Sweater!

Party in the front...


Party in the back.

(Pics from Sodapop)

Pic This: Battle of the Polish Papas

Aga and Caroline are playing doubles together in Toronto, which means some good old-fashioned fun on practice.  I will give Papa Wozniacki some credit for trying (although failing) to get Caroline to pick up the mess of balls behind her.  Oh well, Coconut and her man harem took care of it later.

I'm beginning to think maybe Papa R won't let Aga and Ula have a clothing sponsor just so he doesn't have to wear silly Fila outfits or whatever.

There were times when the Papas were hanging out and chatting.  The times when they weren't were obviously funnier.

Pic This: "And breathe...just breathe..."

That is a really unfortunate hit-face, Elena.

Please. Turn Off That Funky Music, White Boy.

I don't even know what to say about it.  But perhaps the best comment was from kefuoe:

"And what's the track, "Unbearable Whiteness of Being"?"

Hey Oh!

(pic from @BryanBros)

Catch The FeVer

That is Fernando Verdasco.  He is wearing a hat.  On the hat?

FeVer.

My new twitter buddy, Sabrina215 tweeted this to me yesterday and I seriously was in shock.  I sat in disbelief.  Because I like Fer.  I really do.  But this is way worse than "RF".  Why you ask? 

BECAUSE IT'S NOT EVEN YOUR INITIALS!  NOR IS IT A NICKNAME!  YOU MADE IT UP!

Oh, and the story gets better.  Apparently Sabrina and her friend asked FeVer's dad where they could get one.  Daddy FeVer's response?  They're working on it. 

Thanks again to Sabrina for the pic.  And all credit to her friend Amanda for snapping it.  Well done, ladies.

Pic This: "I'm like a bird, I wanna fly away..."

Wednesday OOPs

Toronto:

Matches to watch:  Safina vs. Rezai, Bepa vs. Vinci, Agnes vs. Agi, Masha vs. Bammer, Boots vs. Jay-Z, Gypsy vs. Flavs, Vika vs. Kim, Patty vs. JJ, and Lucie vs. Ana.  Oh, and Kleybs vs. Domi, just for the optical hilarity.



Cincy:

Matches to watch (insane order of play!): Nole vs. Lubey, Marat vs. Steps, Chardy vs. Halpert, Seppi vs. Rafa, Sam vs. A-Rod.

"She's a brick...house...."

(Yahoo is anti-awesome and doesn't have any pics from tonight's match.
So this will have to do.  Pic from maryc)

I'm so glad I was able to find a stream for the Sam/Sveta match because Sammy played great.  Served well (less power, more placement) and really moved Sveta all around the court.  She also had some great opportunities to serve and volley and show how well she can read points.  I do feel really bad for Sveta.  that's a really tough second round draw.  But Sam's win means a potential LA final rematch with Flavs in the next round.  Fingers crossed!

Other than the huge scalping that took place earlier in the day when K-Bond knocked out Venus, it was business as usual for the ladies.  The only other upset (and upsetting it was) was Dani giving up a 4-1 or 5-1 lead in the second set to Svedova and eventually losing 76 in the second set.  Shvedova took a medical timeout and Dani just combusted.  You know, like Dani tends to do. 

Singles - Second Round
(Q) Kateryna Bondarenko (UKR) d. (3) Venus Williams (USA) 16 75 64
Samantha Stosur (AUS) d. (6) Svetlana Kuznetsova (RUS) 64 63

Singles - First Round
(9) Victoria Azarenka (BLR) d. Peng Shuai (CHN) 63 63
(11) Ana Ivanovic (SRB) d. (Q) Magdalena Rybarikova (SVK) 26 63 62
(12) Flavia Pennetta (ITA) d. (Q) Maria Kirilenko (RUS) 63 63
(16) Dominika Cibulkova (SVK) d. Sara Errani (ITA) 64 62
Virginie Razzano (FRA) d. Ekaterina Makarova (RUS) 67(3) 60 62
Zheng Jie (CHN) d. Elena Vesnina (RUS) 63 62
Alisa Kleybanova (RUS) d. Aleksandra Wozniak (CAN) 64 64
Shahar Peer (ISR) d. (Q) Monica Niculescu (ROU) 64 46 76(4)
(Q) Lucie Safarova (CZE) d. Kaia Kanepi (EST) 64 76(3)
(Q) Yaroslava Shvedova (KAZ) d. Daniela Hantuchova (SVK) 76(1) 76(4)
(Q) Alla Kudryavtseva (RUS) d. (Q) Julie Coin (FRA) 26 61 76(6)
(WC) Kim Clijsters (BEL) d. (Q) Elena Baltacha (GBR) 63 64

Doubles - First Round
(6) Llagostera Vives/Martínez Sánchez (ESP/ESP) d. King/Niculescu (USA/ROU) 61 75
Dushevina/Rodionova (RUS/RUS) d. (7) Groenefeld/Schnyder (GER/SUI) 36 76(1) 108
Kleybanova/Makarova (RUS/RUS) d. (8) Mattek-Sands/Petrova (USA/RUS) 62 62
A.Radwanska/Wozniacki (POL/DEN) d. Yan/Zheng (CHN/CHN) 64 46 107
Jans/Rosolska (POL/POL) d. (WC) Fichman/Wozniak (CAN/CAN) 16 76(5) 104

Belly Up

The boys were all about showing off their goods today in Cincy.  Isner scored a huge win over Haasi, in a tight three setter 76(5) 57 76(3).  Really nice win for Halpert.

And Gilly has a two match win streak (what???) with his three set win over Igor.  Man, there is a whole lotta lank going on in that wee little body of yours, Mr. Simon.

But the rest of the day saw quite a few surprising results.  Gonzo retired after the first set to Big Berd, Fer lost to Garcia-Lopez, Lawnmower took out Sods, and Daveed stopped Not!Mario in straights as well.  Add to that list FeLo going down 9-7 in the third set tie break to DoucheStamp, Techno falling to Gooch, and Blah losing to Consumption (ok, maybe that one's not really an "upset") and you have yourself quite the eventful day for the sausages.

Singles - Second Round
[9] G Simon (FRA) d I Andreev (RUS) 76(5) 67(6) 61
D Ferrer (ESP) d [14] M Cilic (CRO) 76(4) 62

Singles - First Round
T Berdych (CZE) d [10] F Gonzalez (CHI) 64 ret. (knee)
G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) d [11] F Verdasco (ESP) 76(4) 76(4)
L Hewitt (AUS) d [12] R Soderling (SWE) 36 76(8) 63 - saved 2 M.P.
[Q] M Youzhny (RUS) d V Hanescu (ROU) 75 62
J Melzer (AUT) d F Lopez (ESP) 57 76(4) 76(7)
A Seppi (ITA) d [Q] J Hernych (CZE) 36 64 61
[Q] C Guccione (AUS) d P Kohlschreiber (GER) 75 26 63
I Kunitsyn (RUS) d J Blake (USA) 76(5) 67(5) 64
P Petzschner (GER) d [Q] S Bolelli (ITA) 76(6) 63
[WC] J Isner (USA) d T Haas (GER) 76(5) 57 76(3)

Doubles - Second Round
[2] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) d R Lindstedt (SWE) / M Melo (BRA) 64 64

Doubles - First Round
M Llodra (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) d J Melzer (AUT) / R Stepanek (CZE) 76(2) 64

Thelma & Louise Take Toronto (Does That Make Brodie Brad Pitt? Huh.)

Inspired by the insightful and elaborate tweeting of the likes of Serena Williams, Carrie and Sodapop have been keeping their minions (like, 7 minions to be exact) abreast of the goings on in Toronto.  For those of you who don't have Twitter, well, far be it from me to let technology bar you from seeing the tournament through their beer goggles.

Their tweets for the past two days, after the jump.

Pic This: Oh Right, I Do Own a Camera

[C Note's Note: As those of you who actually listen to the FD Podcast know, Carrie and Sodapop (and Brodie) are in Toronto for the Rogers Cup for most of the week.  Carrie and Pop will be posting remotely when they're not too busy downing Coronas, fruity liquor, and doing commentary of every single Dina/Z interaction they can get their eyes on.]

And I did have batteries in it yesterday. Unlike Sodapop.  

The black onesie in action... almost losing to a Canadian I'd literally never heard of.

Awesome personified.

Also, we have Ace, the Tennis Canada mascot.  Sodapop has a thing about people in costumes, and it doesn't help that this thing keeps popping up all over the place.  Okay, it's probably also not helpful that I keep taking pictures of it and snickering at her being creeped out.  It is a little weird, though:

Ace watching Amelie/Sveta.

Ace surveying Sammie/Sveta from on high.

Okay, so he maybe is actually the stuff of horror movies.

We have a zillion pictures and some movies from today, but it's late and our connection is slow, so... hasta manana, todos.  

Pic This: I Will Say This, Adidas Makes A Damn High Quality Shirt.

Looks like Sodapop and Carrie finally got their Dina autographs.  Great job, ladies!


Brodie got one too!

 

"I want one."

Air Quotes: The Anti-Rafa

Interesting stuff from the rumored-to-be-engaged Maratski:

Q. You've had your motivational ups and downs in your career. What do you think keeps someone like Federer so motivated all the time?

MARAT SAFIN: Being a fanatic.

Q. About what?

MARAT SAFIN: About tennis. In a nice way. I think you have to really love what you're doing. You have to love it and you have to be a very great competitor, otherwise there is no -- I cannot understand him.

Even though he's on top of his game, and the tournaments he's got, he wanted to be the best of all-time, so he achieve. Obviously he gonna go for it and try to win a couple more. He's playing great tennis and he enjoys it on the court.

He's a player. He's a real player deep inside of him.

Q. More than a lot of other people that are playing?

MARAT SAFIN: Well, he has more ability than others. Maybe a lot other players. Like Murray, he's a player. You can see that he knows what he's doing on the court and he knows exactly at what moment what's he gonna do, and he reads the point pretty well.

Same. They're pretty similar to each other. Federer probably he has a nicer technique, but the rest is very similar to each other.

Q. But Murray is young 20s and Roger is 28.

MARAT SAFIN: That is what I'm saying. They love to play and participate in the game. It's like they enjoy the moment. They enjoy being on the court.  Some people, they have more stress and they're not really enjoying and they're not really having fun in the tough moments.

But them, they enjoy it. The tougher it is -- like Nadal, for example. Same thing.

Q. Were you describing yourself as maybe someone that finds it sometimes stressful and doesn't enjoy those moments always?

MARAT SAFIN: Well, I'm not -- I don't like any sports. For example, I would not play soccer. I would not play hockey. Basketball I hate. I never watch any sports on TV. It's amazing, and I'm a tennis player.

But I don't like it, the competition. For example, if I have to play soccer against neighborhood, I will play for ten minutes and then I get bored. I'm not a player.

Q. How did you last this long at this level?

MARAT SAFIN: It's a miracle, huh? It's a miracle.

Bond. K Bond.

There are actually promo shots of K-Bond in their files?  Did the WTA know something we didn't? 

If you're going to hit 60 UFEs over the course of a three set match (of which you won the first set 6-1), your opponent is probably going to come out on top, even if her name is Kataryna Bondarenko.  And that's what happened, as Venus got Bondo'd out of the tournament, 16 75 64.  The loss to a spectacularly in-form Mono in the Stanford final wasn't much of a concern.  Last week's loss to an en fuego Flavs wasn't too bad, though Venus was spraying the ball everywhere.  But this loss?  To K-Bond?  Just two weeks before the USO?  Not encouraging for Venus fans.

That quarter of the draw (which is on Dina's half, btw) is now completely wide open, with Masha, Bepa, and Aga as the likely beneficiaries.

Killin' Me.

26 63 62.  Pfft.

Bad From Every Angle

Wasn't it Brad Gilbert who told A-Rod to ditch the visor early in his career because no one fears a dude in a visor?  Yeah, for once, BG was right.

Dude got bounced by Garcia Lopez in two tight sets, 76 76. 

And you *know* the visor made all the difference.


With Elf's withdrawal and Fernando's upset, Muzzard has a straight shot to the semis.

Don't fuck this up, Ramjet.

Air Quotes: Sing It, Sister.

Q. Question for Martina and also Monica, and then perhaps afterward Serena can comment. Just some general impressions on the current state of the women’s game with the historical perspective and things that you’re liking what you’re seeing and things you feel could be improved upon, how it is relative to the men’s game right now with Nadal and Federer, et cetera?

MARTINA NAVRATILOVA: I don’t think we need to compare men to women. I think women’s tennis has never been in better shape. We never know who’s going to be No. 1 at the end of the year. With the men it’s been a foregone conclusion until finally Nadal broke the mold last year.

I think women have been very entertaining and intriguing. Like I said, you don’t know who — we still don’t know who’s going to be No. 1 at the end of the year, and it’s just been changing hands so much.

You know, going into any Slam, any tournament, you don’t know who’s going to be at the end. I find it sort of double-dealing with sort of a double standard with — when Chris and I were dominating people, Oh, yeah, it’s always Chris and Martina in the finals. It’s like we always know who’s going to be there. Whereas with men, they have so much depth; you never know who’s going to win.

Now you have Nadal and Federer winning everything for five years, and women have been going back and forth, different No. 1s. Then it’s, Well, with men we have Federer and Nadal. They’re so great. But with women, nobody’s dominating.

It’s like you can’t have it both ways. So I find this double standard really annoying. Now with Kim coming back and playing so well last week, Sharapova is healthy hopefully playing again, we don’t know who’s going to win the US Open. We know who’s the favorite. She’s sitting right over there, but she’s got her work cut out. So I think women’s tennis is in great shape.

Air Quotes: No, I Meant Can You Tell Us Anything About Your Book That We *Don't* Know.

Q. Serena, I have a question about your book. Is there anything in the book that you can tell us about now before it comes out? Anything we don’t know about you that we’ll find out in the book? And also, why did you decide to write a book now?

SERENA WILLIAMS: Wow. I can tell you so much. You’ll learn that I was — being the youngest child, I kind of always got my way and I was a brat, and so when I was writing the book I didn’t realize how bratty and awful I was.

So it’s actually really funny to see as a six- or seven-year-old all the terrible things I did to Venus and all my sisters. I’m so embarrassed, because they reminded me of how awful I was. I was like, Oh, I’m sorry. I apologized to everyone; my sisters, that is.

Twats Prey On Tweeters

If you've been listening to the FD weekly podcasts (which you should, by the way) you know that there's been an attempt to crack down on players tweeting about their matches.  In fact, during the Stanford tournament, the WTA apparently tried to clamp down on players, issuing some sort of directive not to tweet about matches.  Here's one explanation as to why, from Doug Robson:

As previously reported (including on some Twitter postings), the ITF sent out emails the last couple of weeks warning players to be careful about what the Tweet. The rules are not new, said ITF executive director Bill Babcock, but like any messaging system, when players communicate to the public outside of the court, “the current rules could put them in jeopardy” if they disclose sensitive information (read: Something wagers could use). The reminder was prompted in part by media reports of how the NFL is handling the Twitter phenomenon (by clamping down, of course). “It was a simple notice to remember that there can’t be any communication devices on court and be careful off court,” Babcock told me.

So no tweeting about matches.  But if you have books or jewelry to sell, please, go nuts.

Tuesday OOPs

Toronto:

Stadium (from 11.00hrs)
1. Magdalena Rybarikova vs. Ana Ivanovic
2. Venus Williams vs. Kateryna Bondarenko (NB 13.00hrs)
3. Alisa Kleybanova vs. Aleksandra Wozniak
4. Elena Baltacha vs. Kim Clijsters (NB 19.30hrs)
5. Svetlana Kuznetsova vs. Samantha Stosur

Grandstand (from 11.00hrs)
1. Shahar Peer vs. Monica Niculescu
2. Yaroslava Shvedova vs. Daniela Hantuchova
3. Maria Kirilenko vs. Flavia Pennetta
4. Victoria Azarenka vs. Peng Shuai
5. Jans/Rosolska vs. Fichman/Wozniak

Court 1 (from 11.00hrs)
1. Lucie Safarova vs. Kaia Kanepi
2. Sara Errani vs. Dominika Cibulkova
3. Llagostera Vives/Martínez Sánchez vs. King/Niculescu (after suitable rest)
4. Yan/Zheng vs. A.Radwanska/Wozniacki

Court 3 (from 11.00hrs)
1. Alla Kudryavtseva vs. Julie Coin
2. Virginie Razzano vs. Ekaterina Makarova
3. Dushevina/Rodionova vs. Groenefeld/Schnyder
4. Mattek-Sands/Petrova vs. Kleybanova/Makarova (after suitable rest)

Court 4 (from 12.30hrs)
1. Elena Vesnina vs. Zheng Jie

Cincy:

Matches to watch: FeLo vs. DoucheStamp, Sods vs. Hewitt, Big Berd vs. Gonzo (heh), Igor vs. Gilles, Isner vs. Haas, Daveed vs. Tuxedo.

Predictable

I'm not saying the results were what everyone wanted, but let's face it, they weren't shocking.  Maria continued her domination of Nads, winning in straights, 63 64.  Momo couldn't shake off the rust against Tranny, falling in three.  And Mono?  Well...she was Mono.

Oh, and The Cone lost.  But you knew that before the draw was released.

Singles - First Round
Maria Sharapova (RUS) d. (10) Nadia Petrova (RUS) 63 64
Alona Bondarenko (UKR) d. (13) Marion Bartoli (FRA) 64 63
(14) Agnieszka Radwanska (POL) d. Carla Suárez Navarro (ESP) 63 63
Francesca Schiavone (ITA) d. (15) Amélie Mauresmo (FRA) 62 36 61
Samantha Stosur (AUS) d. (Q) Heidi El Tabakh (CAN) 76(2) 76(4)
Patty Schnyder (SUI) d. Anabel Medina Garrigues (ESP) 62 61
Sybille Bammer (AUT) d. Anna Chakvetadze (RUS) 36 64 62
Agnes Szavay (HUN) d. (WC) Valérie Tétreault (CAN) 62 64
Aravane Rezai (FRA) d. Alizé Cornet (FRA) 64 75
Ai Sugiyama (JPN) d. Iveta Benesova (CZE) 63 64
(Q) Roberta Vinci (ITA) d. (WC) Stéphanie Dubois (CAN) 61 62
(Q) Kateryna Bondarenko (UKR) d. (Q) Yanina Wickmayer (BEL) 76(4) 62

Doubles - First Round
Hsieh/Peng (TPE/CHN) d. Azarenka/Zvonareva (BLR/RUS) 46 60 106
Senoglu/Shvedova (TUR/KAZ) d. Chuang/Pelletier (TPE/CAN) 64 64
Kirilenko/Vesnina (RUS/RUS) d. (WC) Dubois/Marino (CAN/CAN) 62 67(5) 106
Amanmuradova/Kudryavtseva (UZB/RUS) d. Koryttseva/Poutchek (UKR/BLR) 76(10) 62
(WC) Kuznetsova/Mauresmo (RUS/FRA) d. Husarova/Parra Santonja (SVK/ESP) 60 64

See? Winning Is Fun!!!

I just.  Want to lick.  His neck. 


Yay, Marat!  He got revenge on Ginepri, beating him in straight sets, 75 76(2). 

Lovely.

Marin bounced back from the early ousting last week to take out JCF in straight sets.  Something tells me Ferrero's running out of gas.  Meanwhile, Ivo scored a nice win over Gael, 64 67(5) 76(2).  So...LaMonf should be well rested going into the USO. 

In other upset news, Daveed took out Stan and Jeremy upset Boredo.

Singles - First Round
[9] G Simon (FRA) d [WC] W Odesnik (USA) 63 62
I Karlovic (CRO) d [13] G Monfils (FRA) 64 67(5) 76(2)
[14] M Cilic (CRO) d J Ferrero (ESP) 63 64
J Chardy (FRA) d [15] T Robredo (ESP) 63 75
[16] R Stepanek (CZE) d V Troicki (SRB) 76(2) 10 ret. (foot)
I Andreev (RUS) d N Kiefer (GER) 61 75
B Becker (GER) d M Vassallo Arguello (ARG) 63 63
N Almagro (ESP) d D Sela (ISR) 64 10 ret. (groin)
P Mathieu (FRA) d M Zverev (GER) 67(4) 75 63
[Q] I Ljubicic (CRO) d F Serra (FRA) 46 63 64
D Ferrer (ESP) d S Wawrinka (SUI) 75 62
J Acasuso (ARG) d [Q] L Kubot (POL) 64 63
[WC] M Safin (RUS) d [WC] R Ginepri (USA) 75 76(2)
S Querrey (USA) d [Q] Y Lu (TPE) 63 64

Doubles - First Round
F Lopez (ESP) / F Verdasco (ESP) d S Huss (AUS) / R Hutchins (GBR) 46 76(2) 10-3
T Berdych (CZE) / P Kohlschreiber (GER) d N Davydenko (RUS) / I Kunitsyn (RUS)  57 76(4) 10-7
R Lindstedt (SWE) / M Melo (BRA) d J Coetzee (RSA) / J Erlich (ISR) 76(3) 36 14-12

"OK, Let's Do It."

I'm sure Brodie's in there somewhere screaming like a little girl.

All Headcase Hour

 

The top ladies looked lovely (well, most of them) for their SEWTA Tour All Access Hour appearances.  I haven't heard any reports of anyone leaving in tears so it sounds like a success.


Girl, you might want to get those nails checked out. I think you might be going into kidney failure.


The face of peace.  Well, not in her head, but you know, in the world.  Generally.


"How many times I have to say?  I didn't make the rankings."


"Will you please excuse me?  I have to go change.  Be right back."


This pic looks straight out of the 80's. 


Good Lord, JJ.  For all the money you've spent on "deviated septums" and whatnot, shell out a few bucks for those eye bags, woman.


I love Venus.  Always the face of calm.  And after being subjected to Serena on Twitter for two months now, I can see why Venus had to develop her Zen skills ASAP.


"I didn't make it.  I just go and I play and the ranking is what it is.  Why you all not listening?  Vera!  Vera!  Talk to them.  I go to room now to play with coconut."

:(

Momo's return was short lived.  She was ousted by Tranny, 62 36 61.

I'm A Little Worried About The Company You're Keeping These Days, Nole.

Nole in the recording studio with the Bryan Brothers. Yeah, wrap your head around that. Also, for some reason he's insisted on wearing clothes again. Bastard.

(Thanks to Victoria for tweeting)

Monday OOPs

Toronto:

Matches to watch: Cornet/Rezai, Momo/Tranny, Mono/Bondo, Nads/Masha.

Cincy:

Matches to watch: Odesnik/Simon, Daveed/Stan, Gael/Ivo, JCF/Marin, Robredo/Chardy, Safin/Ginepri.

Same Shit, Different City

Cincy Men's Draw.

The biggest news from the draw?  Elf and A-Rod aren't in the same quarter.  So that must be nice for Andy.  That said, he is in Fed's quarter.  There's been a lot of talk lately as to how much of a psychological impact that Wimbly final had on Andy.  Did it inspire him and show him his hard work was paying off?  Or did it completely demoralize him and send him into Loveable Loserville?  It's a tough call but if I'm Andy, I'm chomping at the bit to get another shot at Fed.  Here's hoping they meed in the quarters and Andy gets his revenge.  That would be quite the statement going into the USO.

As for Muzz, if he can get some easy early round wins, I give him a good shot here.  He'll probably have to go through either Elf or Fernando (my bet is on Fer given Elf's empty tank), either of which would be fun matches.  Then he would meet either (probably) Fed or A-Rod. 

On the other side of the draw we have Rafa, Nole, Jo, and Kolya.  All eyes are on Rafa, of course, who was pretty jolly after his quarterfinal loss to Elf.  The knees seem fine and the kid can still compete.  He's just gotta hit the rust out.  Unfortunately he's got a tricky draw, where he could face Ivo or Gael, and then a big hitter like Gonzo or Jo.  Not players you can get into a rhythm with.  But at this point I'm pretty sure Rafa doesn't care.  He just wants to get on court.

In the last quarter we have the invisibles, with Nole, Kolya, Gilly, and Haasi.  Nole should come through to the semis, but really, is anyone comfortable counting on him these days?

Breakaway

After three USO Series events, we still don't have a true frontrunner for the USO.  Dina and Serena haven't been able to build too much momentum so far, though (a) does Serena really need any momentum going into a Slam and (b) maybe the run to the finals *was* a momentum builder for Dina.  But of the top 10, no one's really made too much of a convincing statement.

Will things begin to shake out in Toronto?  We'll finally get a full field so we'll get top notch matches from the get-go.

Here's the draw.

Venus and Serena have pretty sweet draws, and Venus finds herself with Bepa, Masha, and Aga and Serena has Caro, Mono, and Ana.  She'll have to deal with a confident Dani in the second round though, and that could be an interesting match.

Coconut, the defending champion, finds herself with JJ, Vika, and Kim, though luck for her, she'll only have to play one of those three, as they're in the other half of her quarter. 

The bloodbath draw?  Kuzzie.  She could play Sam in the second round, Flavs in the third, Lena in the fourth, and Serena in the semis.  A rested Momo is also floating in that section of the draw.

The Battle of Faux #1s

She's baaaaack...


Maybe.

Terrific performance from JJ today, who secured her biggest win and title of the year, demolishing Dina, 64 62 in Cincy.  She dictated play from the first point and really took it to Dina, who seemed completely confused as to what the hell was going on. 

 
You and me both, Dina.  You and me both.

With the win, JJ ties Flavia for the lead in the USO Series.  Here's hoping she can back it up next week in Toronto.  As for Dina, word on the street is that she was in good spirits in her presser and after the match.  Take a nap, hop on a plane, have a bit of chocolate, and go get 'em in Toronto, Coconut.

Ground Down.

Gassed.  Completely and utterly gassed.

That's what back to back tournaments and a grueling 3 setter yesterday will do to you.  More specifically, that's what the new and improved Andy Murray will do to you.  All credit to both players for being able to play their games in rather spectacular fashion (especially Elf for two sets).  I don't know how he was able to dig deep to run down some of those balls and he served so well in tight moments. 

 But Andy did what he did.  He hung in there.  He scrapped and kept his frustration in check to hang in there, even though I was sure Elf was going to run away with it after he broke back in the second set.

 

The hard yards and grueling workouts in Miami were the difference today.  Once Andy took the second set tiebreak the match was over.  There was no way the big guy was going to be able to gut out a third set.  And sure enough, he didn't.  Andy took his second Masters title of the year, 67 76 61.

The win gives Andy a 565 point lead over Rafa going into Cincinnati, where things are just going to get even more interesting.

Cuties.

Congrats, JJ. Now Lose, Please.

Yeah, no shit, Lemon. 

This match sucked and I'm pissed I even have to say anything about it.

Ok, actually, once the rallies got going the quality of the tennis, for the most part, wasn't horrible.  Some impressive shotmaking from Elena and some pretty awesome counterpunching from JJ. 

But Pinky and the Brain went stupid and this whole thing was a joke.  After dropping the first set in a tiebreak, Elena would go on to bagel JJ in the second set.  Then JJ broke early in the third before six straight breaks of serve got us to a tiebreak.  Oh, and let's not mention the fact that JJ had triple match point on her serve before he let Elena break back.  And then the tiebreak, where Elena would have four, FOUR consecutive match points.

JJ won.  So you can figure out the rest.

Now You Know How Nole Feels

  Pwned. 

46 62 75, and he had a match point.

There's no other non-word for it.  Elf is now 3-0 against A-Rod, beating him twice in seven days, in two really tight, could have gone either way, matches. 

Welcome to your first Masters final, Elfie. 

I was really impressed with his composure late in that third set.  He seemed so sure of himself, as though he never doubted he would win.

"What'd you say about my Mama?"

The final will be played at 1:30pm Montreal time.

Happy Coconut

Adorably demonstrative. Also, Rezai. Who knew?

Air Quotes: Belgian Love

Q. How far do you think she can go in her comeback?
DINARA SAFINA: Very far. It's the first tournament, and she beat already Bartoli who just won a tournament. She beat Svetlana who been in a good shape. I think she just need a few more tournaments to get the match rhythm, to get the tournament rhythm. That's all.
I mean, the game she has, and with picking up more tournaments, she will raise her level. Still maybe she doesn't know how we changed. After two years, she doesn't know how we hit the ball.
So play more times and practice more times with us. I mean, just give her three months and she'll be back.

Q. I remember that you played the last match against Justine Henin before she stopped. Now first match Kim coming back.
DINARA SAFINA: Okay, so next it's gonna be Justine coming back. (Laughter.)

Q. First you stop the comeback story of Kim.
DINARA SAFINA: Now I have to make Justine come back.

Q. Maybe.
DINARA SAFINA: I would love her to come back. For me, she was the greatest player. I really admire her. I was looking up to her a lot because of what she managed to do, how hard worker she was, and how mentally tough she was. I'm just -- I don't know, I really respect Justine a lot, and I love her game a lot.

And Now Introducing The New World #2...

Congrats to The Boy Everyone Loves To Hate!  No, not Nole, Andy!!!

He had to weather the Jo-Dub storm but eventually came away a 64 76(8) winner.  Jo, seriously?  You thought dropshotting Muzz was a good idea?  Aw...you're pretty, but you're dumb.

Andy's ability to go further than Rafa in Montreal means that he'll become the new World #2 on Monday.  This will be the first time since 2005 that Roger and Rafa won't sit atop the standings.  FOUR YEARS!  So crazy.  If he keeps on keepin' on in Cincy he could be #2 going into the Open, and Rafa could potentially bet placed in Roger's side of the draw.  Insanity?  Oh, and apparently if Andy wins Cincy and USO he could be #1.  52 weeks, people.  An oh so crazy, 52 weeks.

Of course there will be the haters who say blahblahblah, Rafa's been injured and didn't play Wimbly, blahblahblah fishcakes.  But I'm pretty sure those people will also remember Fed fans saying the damn same exact thing last year when Rafa took over #1 right around this time.  It was bullshit then, and it's bullshit now.

At the end of the day, Muzz didn't pull a Harding on Rafa.  So he can't control what happened around him.  But can there really be any doubt that he busted his ass for this and unlike some people *cough*Nole*cough* won the matches he needed to win in order to get the ranking?

So how about a little respect.  Kudos to Andy.  Onward and upward!  But watch your back.  I hear the rumbling footsteps of a charging bull not far behind.

Also, I'd like to just preemptively give a mighty hearty chuckle at the fan frazzling that's already going on because "ZOMG!!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!! THE ATP HAS A SLAMLESS #2!!!!"  Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

Oh, Flavi, No...

Well the streaking Flavs ran into a brick wall today...


And her name...is Coconut.

Dina blasted Flavs off the court with a 62 60 win.  Now mind you, Dina had a 6-0 H2H against Flavia going into the match, so the result isn't surprising.  But wow, that was one of the cleanest matches I've seen Dina play all year.  Clean hitting combined with a clearly fatigued Flavs equals 2 and 0.  Dina advances to her 9th final of the year.

Coconuts, bagels, and kisses for all!

But Tell Me How You Really Feel

On this week's FD Podcast: Dinara battles a Coconut, does Serena care at all about non-Slams, tips on how to get into a tournament when you don't have tickets, WTA vs. ATP marketing (and the failure of the former), and tennis journalists vs. bloggers, aka, why Pete Bodo can never be a blogger.

We had an agenda this time.  Really we did.  As you can see, it doesn't really help.

Download Podcast

Rusty Bull, Fallen Falcon

Congrats to Elf on his win over Rafa.  He had to fight hard for the first set, eventually winning 76(5) and then cruising in the second set to win 61.  I only saw parts of the first set and though Rafa still looked rusty, it didn't seem like the first set was a "bad" loss.  Not sure what happened in that last set though.

Novak, you ignorant slut.  GET ANGRY!  Play on the edge!  I don't care that it's A-Rod and you're all self-conscious about how you come across to him or to the crowd.  What do you care more about?  Unfortunately, I think I know what the answer is to that question, which is why I don't have much hope for Nole during this USO swing.  Muzz and Rod own him.  In fact, it seems like the one player who can get him up to play with and edge is Feds.  Sigh. 

Pic This: And Dinara Loses Yet Another Friend...

"Yeah, kid, whatever.  See you in New York, choker."